


Visions of Red

by LadyBardock



Series: Darkness [6]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dark, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, M/M, Painting, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rejection, Sibling Incest, Sibling Rivalry, Suicide Attempt, Twincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-11
Updated: 2015-11-02
Packaged: 2018-04-25 20:50:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 26
Words: 59,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4976059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyBardock/pseuds/LadyBardock
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Split upon divorce the twins, Kili and Fili were raised separately. Kili suffers when his twin brother comes to live with them but he fails to realise his brother has also suffered greatly, and the huge gap between the twins causes pain to both to them. Dis clearly loves only one of them and Kili cannot take it any longer...<br/>Sibling rivalry gone down a very narrow path of lust and destruction.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Glancing at the shining golden hair he could think of only one thing, gently brushing his fingers against the thick mane. He loved everything about it, the way it moved, the way it slightly curled when wet. He loved the sight of the gently curled locks, invading the perfectly chiselled face. Those features were worthy of a king. Regular, a strong jaw and a surprising well fitting nose. Everyone single would turn their heads to glance at him, and everyone not single would wish to be single if only for one night. His blue eyes, deep as the ocean, full of sense of humour and light. He loved the way those eyes shone as if tempting to flirt with him, as if always in a good mood and cheerful. He took any chance possible to admire the strong arms, the muscular legs and firm ass. He could never stop admiring that. But what he loved most was the deep sound of his voice. The gently Kiwi tone sounding in his accent despite living in England the last six years. He would often joke around, flirt with people, and then his voice would become even more alluring.

He was like a moth drawn to the flame. He would love to burn in his flame, to come closer and to be tempted to reach out. He felt tempted, but terrified at the same time. Seeing him in the corridors surrounded by girls, or by his team mates. Seeing him play soccer and joke around with his team. Seeing him in class sit along the wall, half listening half drawing something in his notebooks.

He could regret only one thing. That he could not find his voice when near the very person he admired. The very person he should have never dreamt about. He could not come closer to a person who hated him and despised him. A person he should love, but not as deeply as he did. His own twin brother.

The gap between them hundreds of miles deep. One raised by their father and the other raised by their mother, who split them upon divorce. He knew know why they had divorced, their father loved to have fun and a family was not on the list of priorities. It was surprising he took Fili with him to seek adventures in the land down under. While Dis stayed in her family home, with her brother and other relatives nearby. The phone call to pick up Fili from the airport at the age of ten surprised everyone. Seeing the blond boy arrive Kili hoped to find a friend in him. But his brother didn’t want to make friends. At least not with him. He caught all the attention of the family. He was so much more than what Kili was. He was fun loving and witty. Good at sports and languages as uncle Thorin. He looked like their father, but was like a spark of positive energy wherever he went. Everyone loved him, the family accepted him within minutes from arrival. And every following day proved that Kili was pushed to the side.

He always had confidence issues. His dyslexia adding despair into the mix. Any written text seemed to jumble in front of his eyes, becoming an incomprehensible mass of letters. With deep sighs his mother would sit down with him with exercises, but her glances into the living room where Fili was watching TV hurt him every time. He focused as much as possible, he spent countless hours at night practising. He felt so ashamed of his inability and obvious lacking. Whenever he would read a book for school he would lock himself in his bedroom for days and face the dreadful task alone. Separating himself from the family even more.

He could still remember the day cousin Gimli stopped by, when little he was his best friend, but the arrival of the new family member made a change. At first he did not know why the two were whispering in the corners of the house, but when he came to realise Fili was going on a camping trip with Gimli and his family, he just felt a huge wave of pain go over him. After years of practise he did not show any emotion, he did not show he even cared. The casual “I knew you wouldn’t want to come.” From his twin just adding to the bitter feeling in his mouth. Later they would never hide, they would not hide they came over to spend time with Fili. They would not hide that Fili was the one invited to parties, to camping trips and dinners. It was Fili who would go out swimming, playing tennis, football, or video games. Every year adding to the salt already shoved into Kili’s wounds.

One day he just stopped caring at all. He stopped caring if he ate breakfast or not. Stopped caring if he had money for lunch or not. He stopped caring if he had good grades or bad ones, because his were always worse than his brother’s anyway. He stopped caring what his family though about his clothes, his music and his friends. It took seven messages from school to make his mother and uncle realise something was wrong. The only result being they sent him to therapy. At therapy he would just sit there and remain silent. Glancing out the window with hope it would finally end. For show he began eating a bit more, and getting into less fights at school. And after nearly ten weeks of therapy his family settled for the slight positive result.

Fili's paintings and drawings hanging around the house were yet another thorn in his side. Fili was talented, but the display of works was a reminder that Fili's drawings got recognition and his didn't. It was Fili driven two times a week for special art lessons and painting classes. Every family gathering everyone stressed the importance of Fili developing his passion. It took Mrs. Brandybuck nearly a year to convince Kili his works were actually worth something. She kept praising him, but the boy would just raise his head and impassively say he's okay. She tried to convince Dis about taking a closer look at Kili's works, but the woman was so blinded with the uniqueness of Fili, that she didn't even take a look at her other son's work. When Fili chose art lessons at school, and Kili wanted to do the same, he heard he should do something more useful and practical, and after a long fight he signed up for IT just to have some peace. His heart bleeding even more when his brother kept being praised for his drawings. His mother in his memories was the best mother in the world. She used to cook his favourite food, she used to read stories to him. She would take him for long walks in the gardens surrounding their huge house. She would spent time and play games with him. When Fili came to live with them, she focused only on him. She spent time with him, she took him to the cinema, she cooked his favourite food, she bought him the best presents. It was as if overnight she had one son, her new son. She simply became the best mother for someone else.

The day he met Tauriel he was depressed to say the least. She was a new transfer student who joined his class, and after the first glance around the classroom she immediately took a seat right next to him. Later she told him he was the only normal looking person in the whole room. It was Tauriel who pushed him into joining the school archery club. She trained a lot, and her older brother Legolas also became a member of the team. To their surprise Kili turned out to be very good. It took just several tries to learn how to hold the bow, and soon it was evident he was gifted. Not that his family knew anything about it. When their coach insisted on taking him to a tournament he would just say his family doesn't agree. He had to listen to the coach talk a lot about it, but the more he hung his head low, the more the teacher started insisting. Mr. Strider knew about the talk in school about the problems with the boy and simply stopped insisting. During one phone call to Ms. Durin he learnt she had no idea he took part in any club, and from her tone he could tell she was relieved he wasn't calling about any troubles at school, and when he tried to talk about the archery club she firmly said her son had no such interests.

Legolas kept glancing at his sister's friend. Kili was the first person his sister trusted. Out of all the people in the school, she immediately found a person who was equally damaged as herself. The boy was cute, with long brown wavy hair. He was sad and solemn, and introvert. His extroverted sister soon began dragging him around, trying to push him into having some more fun. Legolas did not mind him, the boy surprisingly had a good influence on his sister.

In their previous school she would run away, and keep to her own paths, now at least she had company. Someone reasonable enough to keep her out of trouble. Despite the boy's bad reputation Legolas soon realised he was calm, and he realised the boy desperately tried to avoid any attention from his family. He could still remember the horror when his half sister tried to kill herself. Her presence in their family difficult. She was his father's affair child, born to his own secretary. She came to live with them at the age of thirteen, after her mother's death because of cancer.

His mother hated her from day one. She hissed at the girl, she berated her. And his father didn't give a damn. Legolas tried to keep her sane, he made sure she ate, he made sure she took lunch money and later ate lunch. Kili made it much easier, as if the boy immediately realised how fragile Tauriel was and how much care she really needed. Legolas could only feel grateful for that. His own relations with Tauriel were a bit strained, he tried to help her, but from time to time she would lash out at him without a reason. But still she talked to him more than to his mother and their father. She only talked to their father when she wanted something, and Thranduil feeling guilty for everything would meet any demand.

\-----

“I love your car!” Kili told Tauriel with a huge smile as they were walking around the new BMW. She got a beautiful red cabriolet from her dad. She could see jealousy in his eyes, but she knew not to touch upon the topic. She knew Fili has already done his driver licence, but no one even though of bringing Kili along. And Kili being Kili did not insist or suggest it himself.

“We’re going for a spin!” She jangled her keys and got in. He smirked and jumped in without opening the door. She smiled at him.

“Are you going to be back for dinner?” Thorin asked glancing at the teenage couple in the car.

“No, probably not.” Kili slowly replied.

“Your mother is going to be disappointed.” Thorin noticed.

“He was invited to dinner with my family.” Tauriel quickly intervened.

“Come home by midnight.” Thorin finally mumbled and walked away.

“Dinner at your house?” Kili’s eyebrows went up.

“Yes!” She smiled at him and started the car. “Today is my day!” She teased him with a smile.

Thorin glanced at the disappearing car. He recently realised he barely knew his nephew. Fili was always there, he was demanding attention, talking about ideas and seeking contact. He couldn’t remember a moment when Kili would talked to him out of his own will. He couldn’t remember moment when the two of them would be just alone and talking. Kili with long hair, in black clothes, silent and gloomy. He knew the problems with eating were gone, but the words of the psychologist who evaluated him then still rung in his head. The psychologist suggested that Kili was a great kid, but he needed help. He needed family and safety. His tried talking to his sister later, but she dismissed the whole thing saying Kili had a family. She even underlined the fact that Kili now had a brother and more family to spend time with. He felt worried when the red head showed up as Kili’s girlfriend, but the girl was a Mirkwood, and she had a good influence on him. Despite the long evenings away from home and the fits his sisters was having at the perspectives of joining the two families.

Kili glanced at the huge Mirkwood house, he didn’t really like eating dinner there, but still it as better than eating at his own home. The grim silence at the table shared between the two adults, and the silent pact between the teenagers. To his surprise Thranduil decided to speak just as dinner was ending.

“Kili.” He spoke directly to the boy. “As you know it’s Tauriel’s birthday at the weekend, and she asked for a rather unusual present.” Kili lifted his head and looked at the man, so serious and so solemn he seemed like ice. “It is my daughter’s wish to go on a family trip to Paris, and we decided it would be really nice if you could join us.” Thranduil added with a gentle smile running his solemn image.

“I’d like to, but I’m not sure if my mother would approve.” He spoke slowly.

“I’ll personally talk to your uncle.” Mirkwood spoke in a firm tone. “I’m asking if you’d like to come, not if your mother will let you come. Leave that to me.” He glanced at his daughter waiting nervously. Kili glanced at Legolas and saw an all meaning smirk on his face.

“I’d love to.” He finally replied.

“I’ll arrange it then.” Thranduil nodded with a kind smile. His wife got up from her chair and marched out of the room without a word.

“I love you father!” Tauriel added with a pleased smile and pulled Kili to her bedroom.

As she pushed him on the bed, and jumped next to him.

“Surprise!” She smiled at him warmly.

“You’re phenomenal!” Kili admitted with a smile as she reached for his hand.

“You’re the best friend ever.” Tauriel laughed lightly.

“No, you’re the best friend ever.” His smiled died and his eyes became serious.

“I remember how much you wanted to see Luwr. So we’re going there!” She smiled at him.

“I don’t know what to say...” Kili lowered his head.

“Just be happy for once.” Tauriel gently suggested holding tightly onto his hand. “You have me... I might not be much, but I’ll always be there for you.”

“I wish I could do the same for you...” He noticed grimly.

“You are.” A voice from the doorway startled them. Legolas swiftly sat on the bed next to them. “You made my sister happy.” He told him slowly carefully choosing his words. “You’re like a brother to me.” He told the startled insecure boy.

“I’m glad I met you both.” Kili noticed with a shy smile.

“So are you coming with us?” Legolas smiled honestly. “We’re planning to visit Disneyland as well.” He smirked carefree for once.

“If my family lets me...” Kili noticed with a grim face gain.

“Dad will see it done.” Tauriel smiled mysteriously. “I know how to play my cards well...” She joked lightly with a wide grin.

\----

“What kind of an idea is that?” Dis was royally pissed at the information Thorin told her. “Just because he’s your business partner doesn’t mean he can make propositions like that!”

“He said it was his daughter’s wish to take him along for the trip. And since they will have parental supervision, I don’t see why you would oppose the idea.” Thorin noticed sternly. He had a lot of conclusions towards his sisters parenting skills and not all of them were positive.

“He’s been doing so badly at school! You have no idea how it feels to go there and listen to all that crap they have to say! You have no idea how it feels to see him like this, in these weird clothes listening to that dreadful music and spending time with that Emo girl!” Dis told her brother clearly irritated. “He should be punished, and not rewarded with a trip to Paris!”

“She’s more like a Goth than an Emo...” Thorin noticed gently.

“No fucking difference!” Dis spat at him. “He’s my son and the decision is mine!”

“If he’s such a burden I have a suggestion I would like to make.” Thorin told her slowly.

“What kind of a suggestion?” She asked narrowing her eyes and looking suspiciously at him.

“Let me take over his care.” Thorin told her trying to play her the right way. “I’ve always had a good contact with him, and I think I can talk to him.”

“You had a good contact with him. No one has contact with him anymore.” Dis scolded him.

“His girlfriend has.” Thorin noticed. “Let me talk to him, I’ll set some conditions to this trip thing, and if he keeps to it, I think we should let him go. You’ve been punishing him for a long time now... and I doubt he can see the connection between the reason for punishment and the punishment itself.”

“It’s not like I have been deliberately punishing him. It’s more like I’ve been rewarding Fili for being the best son in the world.” Dis told him “He’s such a great kid, always learning at school, good with people, so friendly and kind. He deserves it.” She finished with zeal.

“Don’t you realise that by making him the best son in the world, you automatically put Kili in the worst son position?” Thorin noticed grimly.

“He was such a good kid, so smart and so nice. Then he became the most annoying brat...” Dis gasped.

“Have you ever tried to talk with him?” Thorin noticed. “Or were you too busy focusing on Fili’s perfection?”

“You can say I lost the heart to try to change him after that eating disorder he had three years ago.” Dis noticed.

“Let me handle him.” Thorin insisted again.

“Fine!” She finally told him. “He’s your problem now...”

Thorin gasped seeing her leave his office. He had a feeling he got into something he wasn’t ready to deal with. Being a full time businessman, and part time uncle, never gave him preparation for dealing as a father figure with a hormone driven teenager. But what was happening to Kili was really disturbing, and he was irritated his sister was blind to the boy’s problems. Thranduil’s telephone was like a bolt of lightning. The idea to allow Kili go for a family trip with his girlfriend’s family was crazy to say the least. But he tried to remember when was the last time the boy took part in any family trip, and to his horror he realised he could not remember such an occasion. It was him, Dis and Fili. Sometimes Gimli, Gloin and Dain. But never Kili, Dis always found a reason to leave him behind.


	2. Chapter 2

Fili sat on the floor in front of his uncle’s office and he was listening in to the conversation between his mother and uncle. It made him feel great hearing how his mother praised him as the perfect son, but hearing his uncle commentary about her making Kili the worst son by default struck him a bit. He never thought of it that way. Kili was Kili. Silent, unfriendly, impassive. From day one Kili hated him, and no matter how hard Fili tried to talk to him, he was always met with a wall of silence. It used to put him off as a child, later as a teenager it irritated him. He simply did not understand what his brother was doing. Going out with that obnoxious girl, staying out all day doing Mahal knows what. Wearing those black clothes and keeping his hair long. Listening to that terrible dark music in his room. His uncle’s words made him realise his mother loved him more than she loved Kili. On one hand it made him feel good, it made the gap in his heart a bit smaller. But on the other hand he felt like being back to New Zealand and all the problems of his past life. He would do anything not to suffer ever again and being the perfect son was the only way to assure that. He suddenly realised their conversation was ending, he got up and ran back to his room.

He heard his brother come home at a very late hour. He saw the black figure walk in darkness towards his room, just opposite Fili’s room. He glanced out and the light coming from the room lit the person in the corridor now frozen with his hand on the doorknob.

“Did you do your English homework?” He tried to sound friendly despite the rage in him.

“What do you care...” His brother replied.

“I just don’t want mom to get mad.” Fili noticed dully.

“She’ll get mad for another reason anyway...” His brother replied in a grim tone. “Keep your nose out of my business.” The dark figure replied.

“If you irritate her it’s my business as well!” His brother noticed in a slightly pitched tone.

“Don’t worry, she’ll have her perfect son, with his perfect grades right around the corner to sooth her irritation.” Kili noticed and disappeared in his bedroom leaving his brother speechless.

Fili stood for a while transfixed with the pain he saw in his brother’s eyes. A first crack appeared on the picture of paradise in his mind. Maybe what was paradise for him, was hell for someone else, he finally understood one of their literature lessons about life. He made it out of hell, and he would do anything to assure not going back that path. His brother wasn’t worth it.

But over the next few days his mind wandered to Kili. He heard Thorin tell the boy he could go, but the lack of smile on his brother’s face disturbed him. His mother threw another fit about school and grades, but uncle told her he will talk with Kili. What was the result of that conversation Fili had no idea, but his brother would come home earlier that usually and less of that awful music could be heard around the house.

He tried to glance discretely at his brother at school. He would always sit at the back, in some dark corner. He seemed to be listening and taking notes, but his grades never showed any result of any work. Fili gently shifted to lean his back against the wall, and pulled out his sketchbook and began drawing anything just to get his mind off the problems of his family. His hand automatically began drawing forgetting about the history lesson and the whole world. When he awoke hearing the bell he glanced at the intricate drawing. Even lost in his thoughts his brother was still haunting him, he noticed grimly taking a look at the drawing he made. His beautiful, irritating, distant brother. He gently traced the picture with his fingers thinking about the slender jaw, the beautiful eyes and cheekbones. His eyes lingered on the slim figure, so much more attractive to his eyes than any girl. He closed the sketchbook quickly, nothing would ever made him endanger his safety and well being, and dreaming of fucking your own brother was not safe at all.

He was very surprised to see his uncle in front of the school after lessons.

“Hey!” He ran up. “It’s a surprise to see you here.”

“I want to talk to some of your teachers.” Thorin told him. “Where is your brother? I’d like to pick him up at the same time.”

“I have no idea.” Fili replied honestly. He never kept tabs on what his brother was doing or where he was spending his time.

“Too bad, I’ll go ask your teachers, and if he doesn’t show up I’ll call him.” Thorin replied. “Don’t you two go home together?” He asked clearly surprised.

“I often have painting or football trainings.” Fili replied trying to find the right excuse. “Not really, we don’t.” He finally replied.

“Then how does he get home, if your mom stopped picking you both up after she bought you your car...” Thorin noticed slightly sternly.

“I have no idea. He probably goes with his girlfriend.” Fili noticed. “I have to go to my painting class.” He quickly left his uncle.

Thorin just glanced at disappearing Fili, still puzzled with what he just learnt. He slowly walked in and headed towards the headmaster’s room.

Gandalf his crazy old English teacher was now the headmaster, which was a huge surprise.

“Thorin it’s so good to see you!” Gandalf noticed with a smile. “What brings you to my humble office?” The man pointed towards a comfortable armchair.

“I’m here with official matters.” Thorin began slowly. “My sister has asked me to look into the matter of her son.”

“Fili is truly a magnificent boy! So bright and talented.” Gandalf noticed with a smile. “I bet you both are very proud of him.”

“I’m not here about Fili. I wanted to talk about Kili.” Thorin told the old man slowly.

“Kili?” The man’s eyebrows went up slightly, and clearly he was very surprised. “I’m puzzled to say the least.” He finally admitted. “I never realised your sister had two children.” He finally noticed.

“He’s in the same class...” Thorin gasped trying not to be irritated.

“Kili, Fili...” Gandalf’s voice hung. “So I wasn’t imagining things!” He finally smiled. “That solves the puzzle! So there are two...” He smiled. “So what do you want to know?”

“My sister has been having problems handling him, he’s become a bit rebellious.” Thorin summed up. “I’m here to sort some things out, and I’d like to talk to some of his teachers, if possible.”

“Now I remember! That’s why I was so surprised with the wave of praise from one side and the wave of complaints from the other, I didn’t realise we were talking about two different boys, both related to you!” Gandalf finally added two plus two. “He’s the Goth type kid, always in black and always in a sour mood.”

“One and the same.” Thorin admitted.

“I can’t tell you much about, I’ve heard complaints, but nothing out of the ordinary.” Gandalf noticed. “Let me see who his form teacher is.” The man reached for his laptop and began tapping in information. “Mrs. Williams.” He finally told him. “She should still be at school, I’ll ask my secretary to call her in. There is little information here, I see he has dyslexia papers, there is also a note from the form teacher about learning problems.” He browsed the information. “His grades are average to say the best. There is a note that the form teacher suggested counselling, but it was refused by the legal guardian.”

Thorin just clenched his teeth hearing his sister refused counselling for the boy, despite the school clearly suggesting it. Gandalf reached for his phone and called in the teacher.

After several minutes the teacher showed up, she politely introduced herself and hearing he came to ask about Kili she just nodded and led him to the adjoining office.

As they sat down she first asked. “I’m sorry to start on a legal note, but before we talk about details concerning the boy I must make sure you are legally entitled to it.”

“My sister transferred her rights to me due to the problems with the boy.” Thorin told her with authority in his voice.

“I’m glad you decided to inquire about him.” She told him with a shy smile. “I have tried to reach out to Ms. Durin many times, but without result. I have no idea where to start, but we should probably talk about the grades first.”

“His dyslexia is still a huge difficulty, his writing and reading clearly affected by it. The problem influencing his learning in general. Normally kids in his financial situation get help and special training, but up to this point any discussion on this matter was not welcome.” She told him vaguely that his sister simply refused therapy. “Setting the learning aside, he is mostly isolated from his peers. His relations both with his class and especially his brother are difficult.” She spoke slowly eyeing her listener. At any mention of this Ms. Durin would usually have a fit. “I’m not sure what his relations to his brother are at home, but I consider it disturbing that twin brothers do not even talk to each other.” She pointed out. “Even the kids that are not friends with Kili, are more friendly to him than his own sibling, and likewise Kili does not approach or have contact with his brother alike.” As Thorin’s brows crossed she stopped to take a deep breath. “I have tried to contact Ms. Durin many times, but after several conversation in person I have ceased insisting. But honestly the boy needs counselling, and along him I believe the whole family should consider therapy. When a situation like this occurs, it’s usually the whole family that has to adapt and try to overcome the problem.”

“So is counselling at school still an option?” Thorin asked slowly.

“Why yes. We have a phenomenal psychologist as a counsellor, and he’s got great results.” The teacher told him with hope in her eyes. “But we would require the written permission from a legal guardian.”

“I am entitled to make such decisions.” Thorin told her firmly. “What can you tell me about his relations with Tauriel?” He asked slowly.

“That’s the only good thing about his relations with other people. From the documents I received about the girl I feared she would cause lots of problems, but somehow becoming friends with Kili, she adapted pretty well. I have seen them many times talking with her older brother and clearly the three are best friends.” She told him with a smile.

“They spend a lot of time together. We were worried at first when he introduced his girlfriend to us.” Thorin told her.

“Girlfriend?” She asked surprised. “I haven’t noticed that kind of relation between them, but I might be mistaken.”

“Is there anything else I should know about the boy?” He asked slowly trying to face the topic of his stubborn sister.

“I’m sorry to say, I have heard several complaints from teachers, that they tried to contact his guardian and she either was unavailable or unwilling to agree to the propositions.” She slowly told him. “The coach was very unhappy she forbid the boy to take part in trainings and taking part in tournaments, but from what I know the boy is still unofficially training in the club.” She decided to trust him and tell the truth.

“What kind of club?” He asked slowly.

“Archery.” She replied. “Coach Strider says he’s very good at it.”

“Anything else?” He asked with a deep sigh.

“The art teacher Mrs. Brandybuck, who unfortunately is now retired, used to tell me about the artistic talent the boy had. I have no idea why he didn’t chose art as a main subject, but if what she said was true his talent is going to waste.” She finally confessed. “The IT teacher is the only one who openly praises him. He says Kili displays a great talent for programming, but again when he wanted to send the boy’s project for some kind of contest last year Ms. Durin...” Her voice dropped.

“Refused.” Thorin prompted. “I agree to counselling. And I would like to talk with the IT teacher and the coach.” He finally told the woman impatiently waiting for his reaction.

“I’ll make an appointment as soon as possible. The coach is still available, I think the archery team is training right now, so we might as well go there and take a look, and later talk with coach Strider.” Mrs. Williams proposed.

“Strider as in Elendir Strider?” Thorin asked slowly.

“Yes, do you know him?” The teacher was surprised.

“He was two years younger than me. We went here to school.” He slowly told her.

“Follow me.” She slowly told him and guided him out of the room and into the training facility.

“The school built a new archery range three years ago, we have one of the best in the country at the moment. They are probably training at the outdoor range.” They went outside and into the trainings grounds. She led him towards the audience stands along the archery range. A group of kids were training at different ranges. Thorin had problems recognising Kili, but then he realised the boy in the green training t-shirt was in fact Kili. He was standing confidently next to his girlfriend and her brother. They were chatting lightly and the coach was explaining something to them.

“Let’s sit down and watch, the training should end soon.” She glanced at her watch. The kids were shooting, but the group Kili was in was standing focused on the coach’s words. Soon each of them did a series of shots, and the coach moved along to check the other groups. Thorin felt really surprised seeing how much confidence the normally shy boy was showing. His arrows hit the mark, and he seemed radiating. Thorin hadn’t seen him in a good mood for what seemed ages. Maybe it was the trip to Paris.

As the kids were heading towards the changing room, Mrs. Williams nodded to the coach to come over to them.

“Thorin! It’s been years!” Elendir greeted him warmly.

“It’s a pleasure to see you again! Archery is still your main thing.” Thorin smiled at the man.

“Mr. Strider we’re here to talk about Kili.” Mrs. Williams interrupted their greetings.

“Is he your relative?” The coached eyed Thorin warily.

“My nephew.” He told him slowly preparing himself for what he was going to hear.

“Mr. Durin has taken legal guardianship over the boy for now.” The teacher explained curtly.

“That’s fantastic!” The coach smiled. “We’re preparing for the grand school league tournament, it would be great if Kili could finally take part. Next year he’s graduating.” The coach noticed. “He’s one of the best I’ve got.”

“I think that can be arranged.” Thorin noticed dully.

“I’m really happy to hear that.” The coach shook his hand clearly delighted with the news. “I was very surprised to see a Durin in my archery team, and more so a Durin friends with the Mirkwoods.” He hinted at the past. “But things do change.” He glanced back at the archery range. “I still remember as this part of the school was just a derelict shack with three stalls.”

“That still got you into the Olympics.” Thorin remembered.

“Yeah, those were good old days.” Elendir looked around. “If your boy would train more seriously since he started showing up, he’d be at Olympic level now.” He added in a grim voice glancing at Thorin. “I hope he’ll be at least able to take part in some tournaments.” He added with hope in his voice, but Thorin immediately caught the negative undertone.

“I’ll sign the papers.” He told the coach. “I’d better get going if I want to catch him before he heads off somewhere.” Thorin noticed the kids walking out of the changing room. He bid both teachers goodbye and went to wait for Kili.

“Do you think something will change?” The coach gently asked Mrs. Williams.

“Let’s hope so, for the boy’s sake.” She noticed grimly.


	3. Chapter 3

“Why haven’t you talked with me about your archery?” Thorin asked in a grim voice as they were driving home. The boy was very surprised he showed up, and he was clearly irritated he got dragged into the car away from his girlfriend.

“There is nothing to talk about.” The boy noticed in a uncaring tone.

“Your teacher says differently.” He noticed.

“No that what he say matters.” Kili noticed in a quiet tone, so quiet Thorin barely caught it.

“Do you remember what we talk about with Paris?” Thorin asked again. In the corner of his eye he noticed the boy clutch his fists nervously. “I’ve changed my mind.” The sigh that reached his ear was so dramatic he felt his heart would break. “I’m not setting you any conditions, you are allowed to go no matter your grades this week.” Thorin gently told him what he meant. “Next time you need anything come and talk to me, your mother decided it was best if I take care of you for now.”

He didn’t hear a sound from the passenger seat. But as they were stopping in front of the gate, he glanced at the boy’s face. And to his horror it was covered in tears. As soon as he stopped in front of the house, the boy darted into the building. Thorin stood there puzzled with the reaction.

\----

Tauriel showed up as soon as Kili called her, she had a bad feeling about his uncle coming to school to pick him up. She did not hesitate one minute, she got in her car, took the latest book they needed for English and drove over.

They spent the afternoon in his room, with her reading him the book. She discovered his problems with dyslexia caused a panic to even think about reading. So later she would get him audio books, or read the books herself, just to make English easier for him. Even with that help his English grades were terrible, mainly due to his tragic hand writing and countless orthographical mistakes. Once she tried rewriting it for him, but the teacher Mr. Denethor yelled at them that she can’t do his home works for him. When he tried bringing in computer written texts, it was even worse because the teacher bluntly accused him of copying it all from the internet.

Fili stood there in front of the door, having almost forgotten why he was there. His mother told him to call Kili and his girlfriend for dinner, but hearing the calm steady voice read a book out loud caught him off guard. He knew the book, he took advanced literature, he knew his brother had trouble reading because of that dyslexia, but why was his girlfriend reading to him out loud? He finally gathered himself and knocked on the door.

The reading immediately stopped, so he gently opened the door to see the beautiful Tauriel Mirkwood laying on the bed with the book, and Kili sitting on the floor next to the bed.

“Dinner is ready, Mother asks if you would join us Tauriel.” He told them curtly, passing on the first invitation the girl ever got for dinner.

“I’ll text my father I’m eating here, and we’ll be right there.” The girl told him swiftly but without her signature smirk. She reached for her phone and quickly wrote a text. “Come on it’s time to introduce me to Satan’s Lap Dog.” She made him smile using the nick name she had for his mother. She nearly dragged him into the dining room, firmly holding his hand as if afraid he would run away. “I’m right next to you.” She whispered encouragingly.

“It’s nice to finally meet you.” Dis was cold as ice, seeing the girl dressed in black.

“A pleasure.” The girl replied curtly with style.

“Please take a seat.” Dis replied with icy cold politeness.

Fili and Thorin soon joined them taking their usually seats. The girl sitting next to Kili, still firmly holding his hand did not change anything. As soon as Fili sat down, his mother smiled at him and asked him about his days at school. The whole dinner was one big conversation between Dis and Fili, about school, about his grades, about his friends. Both of them so lost in the connection they had they did not notice the other three people were silent. Thorin glanced from Dis and Fili, to Kili and the girl next to him. Normally he would talk with Dis and Fili, but today it hit him there was always one person not talking in the room. Kili.

Using the only pause Dis gave him, he immediately asked. “So how are the preparations for the trip to Paris?” Giving the other boy a chance to speak, but Kili just lowered his head and remained silent.

“Very well thank you for asking.” Tauriel swiftly replied for both of them. “We’re leaving next Saturday.” She said as much as she needed without giving much detail.

"Are you going to see Luwr?" Thorin asked gently wanting to know more about the trip.

"Probably." Tauriel admitted. "But I'm not sure, my dad is planning the trip."

"What a fantastic idea, we should take Fili to Luwr he could benefit from seeing all those paintings and works of art!" Dis realized enthusiastically. "I don't know if you realised darling, but Fili is a really talented painter." She changed the topic to her favourite son.

"Yes, I've heard a lot about it." Tauriel smiled her best fake smile. Thorin noticed her hold on Kili's hand became even more firm as if keeping the boy from running away.

"I bet he'll become a famous painter one day, and we'll all go to his exhibitions and everyone will ask us for interviews about him." Tauriel added in a mocking tone.

Dis did not realise the girl was mocking her and immediately continued. "I'm surprised to hear you admire his paintings so much." Dis added with an honest smile."After dinner I'll show you his paintings, and after your trip you could tell us what is worth seeing."

The woman was oblivious to the fake smile on Tauriel's face. But Thorin caught the mocking undertone, and the absurdity of the situation. Kili's face clearly indicated he wanted to run away. He glanced at Fili, who was glaring at the girl with hate in his eyes, as if he also caught the mocking tone.

As Dis was showing Tauriel around the Fili Gallery, as they called the room where Fili's works were hanging, Kili had a look of utter horror on his face. But Tauriel kept him firmly in one spot, right by her side. Fili was walking behind them surprisingly gloomy along Thorin, clearly avoiding looking at anyone. Thorin had no idea if the head down meant he was embarrassed, ashamed or simply mad as hell.

The way the girl was talking with Dis, made him realize the absurdity of Dis's fawning over Fili's art work. The paintings were good, he had to admit it, but as far as his knowledge went they were amateur at best, and the way the girl was playing Dis was hilarious. She had an innocent smile on her face, but the way she was kissing ass to Dis, her slightly mocking tone, her comments made the whole situation absurd. The whole scene made him realise his sister's attitude to Fili's art was unrealistic and clouded with some kind of ill motherly love. He glanced at Kili whose head was down, he avoided looking at the paintings at all, clearly the whole scene was a torture for him.

At the end of the gallery, Tauriel made a worried faced, she glanced at her phone and made a scowl saying her father asked her to come home. Thorin observing the girl for these last two hours, was pretty sure she was acting. And she was a pro at manipulating.

"It was a pleasure meeting you darling!" Dis honestly smiled at the girl.

"Likewise!" the girl replied with a smile.

"I hope you'll come by for dinner more often, you're always welcome at our home!" Dis smiled at her.

"That would be great!" The girl replied approaching the front door, she leaned in to kiss Kili on the cheek. "I'll call you." She mimed to Kili.

"Such a nice sensible girl!" Dis told her family members. "Too bad she's not your girlfriend." She shoved a thorn into Kili's side speaking to Fili directly in front of him. Fili glanced at her, surprised to hear such a mean direct public remark. Fili did not like the implication at all, he had no interest in Tauriel, in truth he had no interest in any girl in the world. But he caught the suggestion, he should have a girlfriend if only to please his mother. He would do anything to never hear that kind of remark in his direction.

"I'd like to talk with you." Thorin asked Dis as the boy headed towards their room.

"What about?" She made a pout, Thorin for the first time really looked at his sister and saw her for who she was. An egocentric selfish spoiled person.

"I think you focus too much on the boy and too little on yourself." He told he gently.

"What do you mean?" She squeaked surprised.

"The boys are almost adults. I know you love them a lot, I know you honestly care about them. But you need to let them grow." He told her slowly. "At their age I was already helping dad at the office, working two afternoons and all summer."

"But they should learn and go to school! They should develop their passions and interests..." She told him, clearly thinking only of Fili.

"They should learn how to manage the company and how to take over the business." Thorin told her dully. "Our whole family relies on the profit from the company and I'm getting old and tired. I need their help, I need to teach them what I know about running the company now until I am still able to." He explained.

"So you want me to just forget I'm a mother and step back?" She hissed.

"No, I want you to remind yourself you're not only a mother. You're a beautiful young woman. I know the failure of your marriage hurt you a lot, but you made it your goal to focus on the kids. But you still have a life to look forward to." He gently hugged her.

"I can't just leave them and start a new life!" She gasped and tears came to her eyes.

"But you must, not for their sake but for you!" Thorin manoeuvred her in the right direction. "It's time to forget about duties and to focus on you, be selfish for once! And be happy!"

"But I can't just leave the boys!" She sobbed in his arms.

"It's time to share the responsibility, I know Villi left you alone with the boys, but I can take the worries off your back. I'll take care of both of them, and you can find yourself!" He gently told her.

"But what will people say?" Dis looked up to him.

"They will say I'm the best uncle in the world, and that the boys are growing up to be great young men." Thorin gently told her.

"What do you want me to do?" She sobbed gently.

"I want you to go to Australia for me." He told her suddenly.

"What?" She gasped.

"I need someone I can trust to test the service in our seven hotels there." He told her.

"You want me to work for you?" She was puzzled.

"No, I need your help." He asked with pleading in his voice. “I haven’t been complaining much, but the condition of the company worries me. We are not making a profit as we used to, we might even be forced to cut down on expenses and sell some family real estate.”

“What do you mean sell?” She looked at him in horror.

“I was thinking we rarely use the house in Cannes, and the apartment in New York. When you visited them regularly it made sense, but now it’s just wasted money, and in our current situation we might need to cut back.” He told her making her clearly very scared. “I need your help, and I need to get the boys into the company.”

“How can I help?” she gasped with terror.

“I need someone trustworthy to go to Australia in my name. I’ve heard rumours that our hotels there are substandard, and since I can’t go there myself I need someone I can truly trust.” Thorin gently told her.

“But I have no idea about hotels...” She gasped.

“But you know how to tell if it’s clean, if the condition are good, if the food in the restaurant is good.” Thorin explained. “I will give you guidelines what to look at, and later you’ll tell me what was good and bad and I’ll give orders to fix it. You would go under a false name, so they wouldn’t pretend in front of you.”

“That’s actually a genius plan!” She noticed.

“I know.” He smirked at her.

“Fine I’ll do it!” She made the decision he wanted her to make. “But you have to plan the trip for me and give me guidelines what to look at. You always have to prepare documents like credit cards and such so that it seems real.”

“I’m going to get it all done. I’m very happy you want to help me!” Thorin hugged her.

“But when I’m gone you need to really take care of my boys.” She insisted.

“I don’t know if you’ve realised, I’ll probably never have any children of my own. They are the closest thing I will have to my own children.” Thorin confessed in a voice full of pain. “Let me be a father to them, the father they never had.”

“I love you brother!” She gasped and hugged him back tightly.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So many comments give you one more chapter as a reward :)


	4. Chapter 4

Fili glanced at his uncle surprised when mother at dinner the next day announced she was going on a trip to Australia alone. For the first time since he came to live with them he felt lost. She was his rock and stone, she was his safety. And despite the respect he had for Thorin, he knew he had to be careful around him. He wasn’t as easy to manipulate as mother.

The next day he was beginning to panic. His mother was packing and preparing for the long trip, and with everyday it was becoming evident she would be long gone. It was actually funny that mother and Kili would leave the same day. He would be left all alone. With uncle Thorin he realised.

He deeply feared uncle Thorin, he was a person who seemed to like him, but he looked at him as if he could see right through him. Fili was trying very hard to keep everyone around him happy, at any sign of contempt he would cover it up with a huge smile and laugh it up. He was straining himself jumping from mother, to teachers, to kids at school. Balancing to keep everyone happy was impossible he soon realised. So he gave up on the one person he couldn’t make happy, his own brother. It hurt him so much to see him. It hurt him so much to hear his deep voice. It hurt him so much to watch him ruin his life, destroying his relations with mother. Kili, his secret obsession. Kili, his curse. Kili his greatest desire. He wanted to be the only son, he wanted him out of his life. He wanted his mother to love him, and to assure that he had to get rid of the one obstacle in his path. He felt so much bitter about him, so much pain was just under the surface of his happy fake smile.

As Thorin drove Kili to the airport and later in the evening again Dis, Fili felt his life slip from his grip. He heard the door open and close. He heard footsteps and a knock on his bedroom door.

“Hey, I’d like you come down and spend some time with me.” His uncle told him firmly.

“I’ll be right there, I just need five more minutes to finish my homework.” Fili replied.

“I’ll be waiting for you.” Thorin told him.

Fili needed just several more minutes, and finally put away his English homework and went downstairs with his heart in his throat.

“Uncle?” He asked surprised he didn’t see Thorin in the living room or dining room.

“I’m in the kitchen.” Thorin yelled.

“What are you doing?” Fili asked trying to behave naturally. “Where is Bombur?”

“I gave him some time off. He needed a holiday. So we’re cooking...” He told his startled nephew.

“I have no idea how to cook...” Fili gasped surprised.

“So it’s high time you learn. After all you’ve only got one and a half year of high school left. And later you will have to face reality.” Thorin told him firmly. He noticed the boy flinch at the very idea.

“Come here!” Thorin encouraged him, slightly surprised he didn’t see the always present smile. “We’ll start with preparing the meat.” He handed Fili a knife and began instructing him how to do it.

After two hours with Fili, Thorin realised he barely knew the boy. In his sister’s presence he would always smile, he would talk about school and friends. But when left alone with him he was surprisingly shy and silent. As if talking in Dis’s presence was easy, and being in his was not. When his mother asked he would answer, but out of his own will the boy had no idea how to talk with him. When asked directly he would answer, but the glances sent his way clearly indicated the boy wasn’t comfortable. Thorin decided to play his cards and provoke the boy.

“I want to be honest with you.” Thorin told him as they were finishing dinner. The boy just raised his head and looked at him. “It’s going to be the three of us for a while now. You, me and Kili. Your mother agreed to give me temporary custody for both of you, and after observing you both the last few weeks I came to the conclusion our family is bizarre.”

Fili’s eyes showed a wave of emotions, but the fear struck Thorin hard. “I will take good care of you.” Thorin told the boy, but the worried look made him realise those were not the words the boy wanted to hear.

“Tell me what you want.” He suddenly told him. He saw him drop his head.

“I’d like to join mom.” Fili finally said.

“I bet you would.” Thorin let the harsh remark leave his lips. “But it’s not going to be like that anymore. You and your brother worry me. You don’t act like brothers should. I had a brother, although you might have not heard about him. Frerin was special in many ways.” He noticed the boy glance at him surprised. “He died at the age of nineteen.” Thorin said suddenly. “He was two years older than both of you. He was like your mother, selfish and spoilt. He was a great manipulator, he loved having fun no matter at what cost. You look like him a lot.” Thorin glanced at the boy.

“I do?” The boy asked in a hushed voice. “How did he die?”

“He overdosed.” Thorin told him slowly. “He was at some crazy college party, got drunk and someone proposed some pills. He was too drunk to know what he was doing, and the pills he took weren’t just for fun...”

“I had no idea...” Fili gasped.

“No one had any idea. I was busy with my university and work, I had different friends and problems. Dis was too young, she was still in high school. We didn’t spend time together, we weren’t really close.” Thorin confessed. “Just like you and Kili.”

“That worries you...” Fili noticed.

“It gravely worries me.” Thorin added. “That’s why I’m happy to spend this week with you. I want to get to know you.”

“I would really like that.” Fili tried using his skills against Thorin the first time.

“Tomorrow we’re going out together just the two of us.” Thorin told him. “And I’d like you to come to my office two days a week, it’s time to teach you some useful things!” Thorin gently touched his arms, but he felt the boy go stiff.

“Office?” Fili gasped.

“You’re going to inherit the company with your brother in the future, so you both need to learn to cooperate and be useful.” Thorin told him.

“Aren’t you going to have any children?” Fili was clearly very surprised.

“I’m not planning to have a family.” Thorin slowly told him and observed his reaction, but instead of greed he saw panic and fear. “I’m gay.” He finally told the boy, and saw true shock in his eyes.

“So that’s why you’re single?” Fili finally managed to gasp.

“No, I simple never found the right person to spend my life with.” Thorin confessed. “I’m not ashamed if that’s what you’re suggesting.”

“I never said...” Fili gasped.

“But you though.” Thorin noticed. “There is nothing to be ashamed of.”

“I’m not sure mom would agree with you.” Fili noticed sternly.

“You mom is a special person. She believes in what she chooses to believe.” Thorin told him slowly. “Don’t get me wrong, I love her, she’s my sister, but she is egotistic. She is spoilt, and she’s been a pretty bad mother no matter how you look at it.”

“But she’s a great mother...” Fili defended her.

“She’s not.” Thorin replied sternly. “She forgets about one child. She forces you to do what she chooses, not really giving you a chance to speak your mind. She ignores what school and teachers are saying, she stopped Kili’s therapy just because it was uncomfortable for her to practise with him, leaving him all alone. You, despite being her favourite, do only what she decides, and you’re so scared of losing her favour you’d do anything for her just to make her happy.”

Fili glanced at his uncle with a strange face. “I know her well.” Thorin continued. “And I know what she was doing was bad for both of you. I need at least one of you two to step up and take over the company, and a puppet or a hurt depressed teenager won’t be able to pull it off.”

“I’m not a puppet.” Fili told him slowly.

“Think about your life. Think about how much you want to please your mother, and then tell me if you really are a puppet or not.” Thorin advised him. “I want to assure you, no matter what happens you’ll always be my family. I will support you, I will protect you and take care of you. But at the same time I want you to learn to make your own decisions, and to live your own life.”

“What do you expect from me?” Fili asked playing his cards in the open.

“Get to know your brother. You don’t have to love him, or be friends. But it would be great if you would be able to talk.” Thorin told him. “When he comes back, I want you both to drive to school together. And twice a week join me at the office in the afternoon, helping out with whatever might be needed.”

“Fine.” Fili replied coldly. “I still have some maths homework, may I go back to my room?” He growled.

“Yes, school is important.” Thorin noticed and watched the boy go upstairs. The seeds had been sown.

\----

Paris was everything Kili hope it to be. He loved the city, he loved the crowd, he loved the Eiffel Tower, and Luwr and all the other galleries. He had lots of fun in Disneyland, with Legolas and Tauriel. His friends were fun people and going around town just the three of them was thrilling. Thranduil gave the teenagers enough space, and enough guidance to assure they were safe.

Kili liked both his friends, but slowly he was becoming worried. When he met them Tauriel and Legolas were practically strangers. Now they seemed almost inseparable, he was important for both of them, but the connection they shared was surprisingly close. He was puzzled by it until one day he walked into Legolas’s room to find them both kissing madly.

“Kili!” Tauriel gasped seeing him. Legolas was pale, and both of them terrified.

“We...” Legolas tried.

“You don’t have to explain.” Kili told them trying to remain calm.

“I’m sorry, I know you like Tauriel...” Legolas tried to talk to their silent pale friend.

“I like her, but...” Kili slowly told them. “But not like that.” He finally told them. “I’m gay.” He finally managed to gasp.

“What?” Legolas seemed puzzled.

“We were really just friends...” Tauriel told him slowly. “But you didn’t want to believe me.”

“So you’re hiding you preference as much as we’re hiding...” He gasped feeling uneasy.

“I told you we could talk with him...” Tauriel scolded her brother.

“You’re okay with this?” Legolas was clearly surprised.

“It’s not like I mind.” Kili told him slowly. “You’re my only friends.”

“Kili I wanted to ask you... Will you officially be my boyfriend?” Tauriel gasped. “This is pretty delicate...”

Kili blinked at her. “Why would you want that?” He asked puzzled.

“As a cover. We spend a lot of time together anyway.” Tauriel made him realise. “I know you’d much rather be my brother’s boyfriend, but that would be... too uncomfortable for me knowing you’re gay.”

“You’re not interested in me are you?” Legolas asked worried.

“I like you, but not like that...” Kili finally managed to tell them.

“So will you help us?” Tauriel asked pleadingly.

“What kind of help?” Kili asked slowly.

“We want to move out from our home. And it would be easiest to organise if you come and join us.” Tauriel slowly explained.

“Are you really okay with this?” Legolas asked clearly worried.

“I’ll help you.” Kili told them with a smile. “And I’d really like to move in with the two of you.”

“Will you go to university with us?” Legolas asked. “We were thinking about somewhere far away, where no one would know we were related.”

“That’s risky.” Kili noticed.

“We know, but having you around would always be a great cover.” Tauriel noticed.

“Can we trust you?” Legolas asked in a strained voice.

“Yes.” Kili told them. “I’d do anything to help you both.”

“You’re the best friend ever!” Tauriel rushed and hugged him.

“No, you’re my best friend ever.” Kili admitted. “And I suspected something.”

“Is it that visible?” Legolas was clearly worried.

“Not at all, I just know you both well.” Kili admitted. Tauriel had tears in her eyes, she held his hand tightly. Legolas stood right next to her and reached for his other hand.

“If you ever need anything, and I’m serious.” Legolas told him slowly. “We’ll do anything for you.”

\----

When Kili returned home we was mildly surprised with the connection he felt between Fili and Thorin. His mother not being there meant no more mean comments and needles. But what uncle had planned out, for them to drive together to school, and the afternoons in the office seemed to be like one big joke. The first day of going to school together was grim silence.

As Fili stopped the car at the school parking lot, he glanced at the dark haired boy next to him.

“I’m driving to the office at three thirty.” Fili slowly told his brother.

“What does uncle expect from us?” Kili slowly asked.

“I have no idea what he’ll expect from you. He makes me make coffee, rewrite letters and deal with telephones.” Fili slowly told him.

“Just fucking great!” Kili gasped.

“You’re such an ungrateful bastard!” Fili growled irritated.

“If I’m a bastard, then so are you...” Kili sniggered and got out of the car. Fili watched him disappear in the school building. He felt his pulse rise and he felt a surge of adrenaline. He felt a bitter sweet taste in his mouth, he wanted to press into those soft red lips, he wanted to punish him. For those insolent words and disrespectful behaviour. For being so alluring and so irritating at the same time.

He got out of the car and slowly walked to his first class. Fortunately for him on Monday they didn’t have any classes together. But it didn’t change the fact that he kept drawing his brother all day, still with that disrespectful smirk on his beautiful face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I began writing this story I had no idea you all would feel so strongly about it. For the first time I have no idea if the comments are actually positive or negative :S Anyway strong feelings means someone is reading, and someone is deep into my story :S Either I'm crap and I'm just irritating you all, or I'm actually doing a good job to give off the minds of a very bizarre group of people and make them realistic enough to evoke such strong feelings :S Anyway thanks to the response you get one more chapter ;)


	5. Chapter 5

Classes were the most annoying thing in the world. Thank Mahal he had Tauriel next to him during English. She would always read the passages, but quiet enough for the teacher not to react. Mr. Denethor got used to her mumbling while reading, and Kili was very grateful for it. Maths it was Kili helping Tauriel, she was hopeless at it, so any help was a blessing. Somehow discovering his best friends were fucking each other should disturb him, but considering his own life, his own darkest thoughts, it wasn’t all that shocking. He would cover for them, he would protect them. They were closer to him than any member of his own family. The day ended with IT, his favourite lesson. He was finishing his new project. His teacher suggested he should try to design a new game. This time his task was an educational game to fight dyslexia and his own problems and experiences gave him many ideas. His teacher kept saying he would manage to convince his mother to send it for the yearly IT competition, but Kili doubted that scenario.

When the day was ending, he felt himself become agitated. He was so emotional about going to uncle’s office, but the real deal was driving there with Fili and spending the day with him.

“So you’ll drop by tomorrow after training?” Tauriel asked. “I’ll pick you up.”

“I’m not sure I’ll be able to.” Kili admitted holding her hand firmly.

“We’ll find time, you need to paint it all out.” Tauriel whispered to him.

“You’re the best friend ever...” Kili leaned in and kissed her cheek.

“Since I’m your girl friend now... I get to kiss you more...” She hissed and pressed a kiss on his lips. Kili just gasped in shocked and looked at her with a puzzled expression.

“Your brother is waiting...” Tauriel hissed as she broke the short kiss. “And so is mine...” She winked at him and with a huge smile went to join Legolas in his car.

When Kili reached the car, he saw Fili tapping the steering wheel impatiently. His fucking perfect brother was showing the first weakness ever, and Kili briefly wondered what could make Mr. Perfect so agitated. Most probably it was his presence in the car. The few days Fili was alone with Thorin, their mutual relation was close. Now Kili was the odd one in the mix, and he felt more rejected than ever.

Driving to the office they were both silent, the only sound in the car was a song by Linkin Park playing in the background. Fili held the steering so tightly his hands were white, his body slightly trembling with the tension. They walked into the office in silence, only greeting the employees they met on the way.

"Come in." Their uncle's voice sounded from the closed door.

"How was school?" Thorin asked noticing the grim silence between the boys.

"Okay." Fili answered.

"Boring." Kili replied in one word as well.

Thorin glanced at the tense boys, they were not looking at each other, their heads were down and both were in a foul mood. "I have a special task for both of you." He began explaining their job.

"And I'm setting a deadline and conditions." He pulled out a big file of papers and set them on his working table. "Here is the new hotel we're building in Madrid. It's going to be a huge enterprise, five star and luxurious." He showed them photos of the building site and the prospect look of the hotel.

"I have already ordered our three interior designers to prepare projects for the hotel, but none of them meets my expectations fully." He slowly told them placing the files on the table. "Your task is, I need the decision made for the interior design, and you are going to make it together." He noticed both boys glare at him. "And a decision like ‘I don't give a fuck, he can chose whatever’ won't work. You will have to justify your decision, and defend it, and I won't go easy on both of you."

"How long do we have?" Fili asked in a grim voice.

"Four weeks." Thorin told them. "You'll get the project of the hotel, all the prospects and the project for the interior decoration. You have to make a decision together on everything starting from the lobby, restaurant, and ten designs for rooms depending on price range. I have attached the budget of our last hotel, and the designs, but those are only for reference purposes."

"What if we can't agree?" Kili asked in a deadly grim voice.

"Then you're both grounded." Thorin gazed at the firmly. "No evenings out, no car, no cell phones and no trips."

"I don't have a car or phone." Kili spoke in a low voice.

"But you have a girlfriend." Thorin noticed seriously with a threatening tone making the boy lower his head.

"Can we redesign it, if none of the projects meets our expectations?" Fili asked glancing at the projects. His brows were crossed, clearly the designs did not please him.

"You may. However the final decision will be mine." Thorin told him firmly.

"Can we do this at home or do you require our presence in your office?" Kili asked slowly.

"You may work from home." Thorin decided to be reasonable. "But no one can help you, not even your girlfriend. And if you fail this task all the others will be done in my office under my personal supervision. And believe me - none of them will be easy."

"Fine." Fili noticed with defeat in his voice. "I'll do my best."

"Kili?" Thorin growled at the silent second teen.

"Fine." The boy finally mumbled.

They returned home in silence again. The huge file of documents on the back seat.

"Where are we working?" Fili asked his silent brother.

"Your painting room." Kili growled his decision, and sent him a firm glare.

"I'll get some paper and pencils." Fili walked to his room after leaving the files on the table. When he returned his brother was lazily leaning against a chair and looking at the designs.

"Do you like any of them?" Fili asked, he was determined to get the task done, with his brother's help or without.

"No." His brother replied after glaring at him for a longer while with strange deep eyes.

"I could draw a new design." Fili told him slowly.

"I bet you could." His brother hissed.

"We have to do this job!" Fili raised his voice.

"I don't really give a shit..." Kili growled back.

"Uncle said we have to decide together." Fili yelled back.

"Like shit, how does he plan to check that?" Kili told him wittingly. "He'll ask if the other agrees, and of course I will agree with anything you do."

“You’re not leaving me alone with this crap!” Fili spat at him.

“You’ll managed better without me Mr. Perfect!” Kili spat back. “So just do what you do best, kiss ass and meet all expectations, I’ll confirm we worked together and agree to anything you want.”

“I don’t kiss ass!” Fili spat back being on the defence.

“You do, all day, every day to everyone.” Kili retorted. “At school, with mom, with uncle...”

“Are you jealous I don’t kiss your ass?” Fili wittingly spat back.

“Don’t you even dare try that... I’ve had enough of shit having you around as it is....” Kili threatened.

“You’re so full of shit!” Fili yelled at him. “Why don’t you shut up for once and do what you are told? Or aren’t you smart enough to realise it’s easier to fulfil orders than to fight the authority that gives them?”

Kili glared at him with hate in his eyes, he always had a feeling his brother never respected him, that he considered him an idiot. “Since I’m such an idiot you’ll do this better without me...” He gave Fili a wide grin and left the room, heading towards his bedroom.

“Fucking shit!” Fili slammed his hand on the huge table. He glanced around at his painting all around, and quickly took them off, he had to have place to focus. He glanced back at the documents on the table. He pulled out the design of the building, and the projects done by interior designers. Then he glanced back at the door. There was no fucking way he would deal with this mess alone.

He ran upstairs and rushed into Kili’s room without knocking. He glanced at his brother sprayed across the bed with a phone in his hand.

“You told Uncle you didn’t have a phone...” Fili told him in a deadly voice.

“Do you always tell everyone about everything?” Kili snapped back hiding the phone in his back pocket and sitting on the bed.

“I’ll tell uncle you lied to him, if you don’t move your fucking lazy ass downstairs and help me!” Fili growled.

“Mr. Perfect needs my help?” Kili mocked him.

“Stop calling me that!” Fili yelled at his brother losing his temper.

“Even if he finds out about this phone, he’ll ask to whom it belongs, and it does not belong to me. It belongs to Tauriel...” Kili spoke in a low threatening tone. “So he’ll ask her to take it back. End of story.”

“You’re so full of shit, I wonder how she manages to stay with a looser like you!” Fili made the insults personal again.

“Says the one who can’t get himself a decent girlfriend!” Kili spat back.

“At least I’m not sleeping around with a slut!” Fili added quickly. The moment those words left his lips he knew he made a huge mistake. The face Kili made, so full of hate and anger, made Fili realised he crossed a magical border of his brother’s patience.

“If you ever insult her in any way, I’ll personally beat the shit out of you, and then I’ll go around and rip every last lousy painting and drawing of yours to shreds!” Kili spat at him angrily, clearly barely in control. “She’s so much better than you, you have no right to talk bad about her!”

“Since she’s so perfect why is she sleeping around with an asshole like you?” Fili taunted again.

“Better me than you!” Kili noticed with a strange smirk on his face. The way he was looking at him made Fili shiver.

“Fine you win, keep your bimbo. Now move you lazy ass and help me.” Fili told him.

“I’ll be down in twenty.” Kili told him. “Otherwise I’m not sure I won’t kill you in the middle of the work.”

“Fine, take your time, but if you’re not down in half an hour, I’ll come and drag you down.” Fili threatened.

“I’ll be there, the sooner you leave the sooner I’ll come down.” Kili told him firmly.

“Fine!” Fili said his last word and closed the door with a loud bang behind him.

Fili stood for a moment still shivering from the adrenaline. He avoided conflict all his life, but the fight with his brother made him feel almost alive for once. He felt the emotions make him tremble with anticipation, as if his soul wanted much more. He glanced at the closer door, and swiftly went to his room. Twenty minutes were all he needed to set things into perspective.

He closed his bedroom door and locked it behind him. He reached into his trousers to ease his throbbing erection. He brother always got the best of him, and the fight now made his desire shift to a new different level. He gently stroked himself, still feeling the wild surge of adrenaline in his veins. It was so wrong on any level, it was so wrong to lust for your own brother, but no matter how wrong it was, it worked better than any porn movie or girl or boy he’d ever met.

It was wrong to do what he was doing now, but it felt different than what he did every night. This time it felt stronger, their recent fight, the fact they actually talked made him even more impatient and lustful.

His mind shifted to imagining it was his brother’s hand touching him, and he came in a silent gasp into his own hand. He had to make sure his brother never found out about his weakness, Fili realised quickly. He had to make sure no one ever found out, because that would mean losing everything he worked so hard for. He had to stay focused and in control. His whole life depended on it.

\----

Kili felt defeated for the first time in over a year. He rarely let the emotions in him get to him, his walls high and thick. But uncle surprised him with the crazy task, and the fact that he had to do it with his most hated brother made it even a heavier burden. He hated both his uncle and brother for pushing him into this mess. But he knew Fili was right for once, they better get it done, and do it diligently, otherwise they would both be screwed. Uncle never threatened without coverage. He would ground them, he would take Fili’s car, Fili’s phone. Forbid them both to go to extra lessons, cut their allowance, not that Kili got any, and separate him from Tauriel. And any separation from Tauriel would be the end of him, her being the only one normal thing in his life.

He stood there for a moment thinking how to play this. Going back down in his current emotional state was out of the question. He could feel the rush of adrenaline, the shivers going down his body, and his mind was clouded with thoughts he did not welcome at that very moment. He had to get down to work and spend several hours with his brother working on the stupid project. And there was only one way he could manage that. He had to get rid of the hard on he got from the fight. Fili, his irritating, hateful, foul mouthed, despicable brother. With the best body in the world, the smartest, most loved, perfect brother. Kili just loved to imagine him on the floor in front of him with his cock in his mouth. He wanted to break that perfect boy imagine, he wanted to spray him with his cum and make him plead for mercy... or for his cock. Just one hard stroke was enough to send him over cloud nine. The verbal fight giving him much more excitement than he thought possible. It was fun, he realised grimly. And this project thing didn’t look as bad now as he was wiping his cum.

He cleaned himself, and grabbed his laptop and went downstairs taking his time. He was a bit surprised his perfect brother wasn’t back in the studio, but he didn’t really mind. He quickly turned on his laptop and opened the websites of several top class hotels. As he was glancing at the various decors and styles, he saw his brother come in.

“Stop playing we’ve got work to do.” Fili scolded him, but with some kind of mean smirk on his face.

“I’m not playing.” Kili replied firmly. “Move your ass and come here.” He pointed to the chair next to him.

His brother slowly took the seat and glanced at the laptop. “What is that?”

“I’ve opened the websites of five of our hotels and three more competing hotels.” Kili explained and began showing him the pictures.

“Are any of them in Spain?” Fili asked.

“No, but they are all the same style as the project we got from uncle.” Kili noticed. “As if someone did a copy paste and just changed the colours a bit.”

“Making all the hotels look the same is not the point.” Fili looked at the projects on the table. “Who would want to spend a fortune to stay at a place that looks just like any other hotel out there?”

“That’s my point.” Kili noticed coldly.

“If you’re a British tourist going to Madrid, you don’t want to stay in a hotel that looks like a copy of Arkenstone in London. You want to pay for something that is different but posh in its own style.” Fili noticed.

“The question is, make it Spain inspired or something original and daring?” Kili noticed.

“Best would be original and daring but Spain inspired.” Fili added both ideas. “Are there any Spanish five stars we can compare to?”

“Of course there are.” Kili noticed grimly and quickly opened google and began typing. Soon they were looking at what looked like a copy of the Arkenstone, but less classy, or some places like cheap imitations of what some designers thought was Spanish style.

“How can we be original and daring in Spanish style, when everything the other hotels offer is pretty much the same.” Fili noticed.

“We have to feel the Spanish vibe to do it.” Kili noticed calmly with a smirk. “But first let’s analyze what we need and how many types of rooms we have to plan out and do the maths first. Then we’re both studying Spanish style independently.”

“We’re not doing anything independently.” Fili noticed. “What do you mean by study Spanish style?” He asked firmly.

“Going into the Spanish zone?” Kili asked with a smirk. “That’s easy, I’m going to watch some Spanish films, then listen to some Spanish music and visit like a hundred websites about Spain.”

“We can do all that in my room, on my wide screen TV.” Fili noticed, trying to hide the fact that he was thrilled with the idea.

“Fine. Let’s make a list of the types of rooms first. We need to know what we’re planning out before we start planning.” Kili noticed confidently.

“Fine.” Fili reached for the project of the building, and the visualization.

“Can you try to find at what stage of development the hotel is?” Fili asked as they were digging in the documents. “I hate that colour.” He pointed at the prospect display of the building.

“Here’s the list of rooms.” Kili passed him a page. He was swiftly glancing at the documents, he was dyslectic, but he was great at seeing numbers and finding information. It was the reading and writing that was problematic. After a long moment he pulled out a sheet of the contract with the building company. “The building is to be finished in six months. They should be building the tenth floor now according to the schedule. So if you’re persuasive enough you just need to convince uncle to the idea.” Kili noticed. “I mean in six months it’s the end of the proper construction, then there is a second subcontractor doing the interior decorations and finishing details.”

“Give me that!” Fili took the sheet from him and checked the information again not trusting his brother.

“So what kind of rooms did the designer plan out?” Kili asked curiously going back to the first sheet he gave his brother.

“Ten types, divided on five different price standards.” Fili told him.

“But the hotel is like six hundred rooms, why make them all the same?” Kili realised.

“I was thinking the same thing. It’s easy to change the colour a bit, or add a different wallpaper.” Fili noticed.

“So we’re set on making a wider variety?” Kili asked looking at his focused brother. Damn he looked even more cute with those thin lips pressed together tightly as he was focusing on the documents.

“For sure.” Fili noticed.

“The rooms are in eight different sizes in every price category. We should make eight designs for each price range.” Fili noticed.

“That’s forty designs.” Kili summed up.

“Plus I think every suite on the top floor should have its own individual touch.” Fili added.

“Like a special feature?” Kili added his idea.

“Exactly!” Fili smiled at the sheet.

“So now that we know what we’re up against, let’s go research the Spanish vibe...” Kili added grimly.

“After you!” Fili noticed and grabbed a sketchbook and pencils.

 


	6. Chapter 6

“So are they doing anything useful?” Thorin asked Bofur for an update on the situation in the house, he called just to make sure both boys didn’t run away.

“I never knew Fili could yell and insult like that.” Bofur dully noticed. “After World War three, they ran to their rooms, later it was World War four. Now they seem to be doing something together in Fili’s room, I think.” Bofur told him slowly.

“But they are together?” Thorin wanted to make sure.

“Seems so, but without the yelling and insulting I can’t be one hundred percent sure.” Bofur noticed grimly. “Do you want me to check on them?”

“No. Just act like nothing special is going on.” Thorin told him smirking to himself. His main goal was already achieved, Fili and Kili were spending time together.

When Thorin came home later in the evening, he took in the mess on Fili’s desk in his studio. There was no sight of the boys.

“Where are they?” He asked Bofur and Bombur who were chatting in the kitchen.

“Fili asked to serve them dinner in his room like an hour ago.” Bombur told him slowly.

“How has it been?” Thorin asked slowly looking at the two brother, who were more like friends than servants.

“Another World War like every half an hour.” Bofur summed up curtly. “They fight and they stop and again after some time.”

“Fili has always been such a good boy, I never thought he could act so vulgarly.” Bombur added surprised.

“I told you, the way those two act around each other isn’t normal. It was just a matter of time that the tension hit the roof.” Bofur noticed.

“Would you like some dinner?” Bombur asked him employer.

“I’m famished.” Thorin complained and sat down to eat with the two of them in the kitchen.

As he was going to his office he heard the boys for the first time.

“You narcissistic egotistic bastard!” He heard Kili yell.

“If I’m a bastard then so are you!” Fili retorted.

“Stop messing around! With your lazy pace we’ll be doing this all night!” Fili yelled at Kili.

“Shut the fuck up and try to do something useful!” Kili replied.

“I’m drawing!” Fili retorted.

“Draw later, now we’re searching for ideas you dim wit!” Kili replied swiftly.

Thorin just stood at the bottom of the stairs and smirked. The boys were talking, even if in an uncivilized form.

The conversation was stopped when a door slammed. Clearly Kili left to go to his room. Thorin just smirked and went to his office.

\----

Kili ran to his room, feeling irritated beyond measure. He had to blow some steam, and running under the shower seemed the easiest way. He dropped his clothes were he stood, and he got under the shower. First he had to get rid of his hard on, like the third time that evening.

He felt the warm water wash over his body, and bring relief to his body and soul. He slowly got out and began drying. When he wrapped a towel around his hips and returned to his room he was startled to see his brother standing there furious.

“Don’t you ever dare run out on me again!” Fili seemed to be steaming with irritation. Kili had no idea that it was his sight half naked that drove him so crazy.

“Uncle is home.” Kili told him. “If you want to fight, make it quiet.” He made his brother realise. “Or we’ll have uncle here in no time.”

Fili closed his mouth and just stared at Kili with a heavy glare.

“Go back to your room, or get some air. I’ll be back soon.” Kili slowly told him feeling the pressure of the glare. “But do not fight with me loudly. The last thing we need is uncle Thorin supervising us, and us working in his office.”

Fili blinked taking in the information, but what really put him off was the deep calm tone. He made several steps forward so that he was standing right in front of his brother.

“Don’t you ever run off like that again.” He whispered feeling a conflict of emotions in himself.

“Don’t yell at me.” Kili slowly replied also in whisper, the way his brother was staring at him made him feel uneasy.

“Why are you whispering?” Fili asked back still in whisper.

“Because you’re whispering...” Kili replied in a hushed tone, the way his brother was staring was making feel jiggery. His eyes automatically shifted to his brother’s lips.

“I’ll join you soon.” Kili slowly repeated.

Fili inhaled deeply, and his eyes became magically darker. He glared at Kili even stronger. “Don’t make me wait.” He gasped and left swiftly. Kili finally began breathing again when the door closed, he didn’t even realise he was holding his breath.

Fili slumped against the door to his room. He tried to calm down, but he never felt so agitated before in his life. Fighting with Kili was making him feel excited, but the proximity to a naked Kili, the smell of his freshly washed body, the gentle trace of dark chest hairs on his chest, the perfect white pale skin, was driving him insane. He was just one step away from leaning in and kissing him. He was a heartbeat away from pressing into him and just doing what he kept dreaming about. “Control, I have to control myself.” He gasped sitting on the floor next to the door and wrapping his arms around his legs.

Kili walked into Fili’s room dressed in shorts and a t-shirt. At first he thought the room was empty, but when the door closed behind him, he noticed his brother sit on the floor on the other side. The way Fili was sitting, with his arms folded, his head resting on his knees clearly indicated he was distressed.

Kili gently extended his hand towards him. “We have work to do.” He told his brother calmly.

Fili looked up to him with a deep dark glare, and slowly took the hand. Fili felt a bolt of electricity hit him, all these years they had never touch one another. Their distance always prevented any even random contact. Now he glared at his twin feeling as if he was touched by a bolt of lightning. And Kili was staring back with equal strength.

“Let’s watch those Spanish films now.” Kili suggested slowly, setting a distance between them. There was no way he would act upon the urge that overcame him the moment their hands touched.

He sat comfortably on the sofa and pulled a blanket over himself. He grabbed one of the notebooks and pencils from the table. Fili made himself comfortable on the other side of the sofa, but he was still sending glares towards his brother.

“A horror or not a horror?” Kili asked browsing the list of films.

“Not a horror.” Fili replied swiftly. He hated horror films, not that he was planning to tell about that weakness to his brother.

“Well there doesn’t seem to be a big choice in the not horror category...” Kili dryly noticed. “Spanish people love horror films, at least so it seems.” He browsed the titles and found a film by Almodovar. “All about my mother?” Kili asked.

“I have no idea what that is.” Fili admitted.

“Let’s see it.” Kili turned the film on.

The film made them both puzzled, it was hard to get any Spanish vibe from it, but what really shook them was the family and people in the movie.

“And I thought our mother was fucked up.” Kili murmured.

“We have a great mother.” Fili spoke in a firm tone again.

“You have a great mother.” Kili immediately corrected him. “I had a great mother.” He added in a grim tone.

“What’s the next film?” Fili gasped changing the topic.

“Orphanage!” Kili added with a grim smile and played the horror movie.

“I fucking hate you.” Fili gasped at the first scary scene.

“But you love the building.” Kili noticed with a smile seeing the drawing Fili was making.

“I love that wallpaper.” Fili noticed as Kili stopped one of the scenes to take a look at the hallway.

“Look at the floor and boarding... I love the way that gentle green compliments the wood.” Kili noticed.

“I like the wallpapers.” Fili added as they continued to watch the film.

As they were watching another scary scene the door to the room opened making the boys jump in terror.

“Uncle you almost gave me a heart attack!” Fili yelled at the figure in the dark.

“As much as I love you both working on the task I gave you, I remind you tomorrow is a normal school day, and it’s almost two am.” Thorin spoke in a grim tone.

“I’ve had enough as it is...” Fili gasped still unable to control his fear. Kili glanced at him surprised, he didn’t think a movie could make anyone this scared.

“Goodnight, you’d better go to bed.” Thorin walked to his own bedroom, further down the hall.

“Are you okay?” Kili asked worried a bit, Fili was extremely pale and clearly agitated.

“I’m fine. I just need some rest. What do you care...” He told his brother and walked to the bathroom.

Kili hesitated for a moment, but then he just shrugged his shoulders and walked into his bedroom.

Fili returned to his bedroom and tried to sleep. But the events of the last day drove him on edge. Being with Kili most of the day had a disturbing influence on him. He hated his brother, there were so many irritating things about him. He hated the attitude, his gloominess, and his influence on him. But he’d love to get his hands on the drawings Kili was making during the film. He’d love to kiss him, and pull him into his lap as they watched the film together. He loved the sight of his half naked body, his slightly curly wet hair. He wanted so much more, and sleep didn’t want to claim him.

With a deep sigh he walked downstairs to his painting room. He moved all the papers to a safe place, and he did the one thing that could calm him down. He began painting.

Kili had no idea what awakened him, but he had a feeling something was off. He got out of bed and decided to get something to drink. On the way to the kitchen he noticed the light on in Fili’s studio. He stood in the doorway holding his glass of water, and he glanced at his brother lost in thoughts in front of a painting. The painting was red, red the only dominant colour. So strange for Fili who usually painted happy placid pictures, to create something in such a vile colour.

Puzzled Kili made several steps forward, it felt funny to him that his brother didn’t notice him coming. With crossed brows he glanced at the painting, and suddenly realised it was his own portrait. In the red background, using different tones of black, red, grey, his own face could be visible. He gasped slighting drawing the attention of the painter.

“What are you doing here?” Fili snapped at him, standing in front of the painting.

“I was just getting a glass of water.” Kili told him calmly. “Can I see it?” He asked slowly.

“No.” Fili spoke in a deep harsh tone.

“Suit yourself.” Kili added grinding his teeth. “Too bad you want to hide the only painting of yours that actually looks good...” He turned around to leave the room.

“What do you mean?” Fili growled.

“I mean, that one looks good, but all the others are just... amateur.” Kili told him from the doorway. “Mother loves your paintings, but I don’t see what’s so special about them.” He added and left, if he had turned back he would have seen the tears flow down Fili’s face.

 


	7. Chapter 7

Fili was silent during their drive to school, and later when they were going back home. Kili felt hurt with the rejection, but he was so used to the blond hating and ignoring him he didn’t think about why his brother was also silent towards everyone else.

When they returned home Fili immediately sat down to work. He started drawing the rooms and trying to get a perspective of the scenery. He glanced at the original projects, and finally placed one in the middle of the table.

“Do you want to base it on this project?” Kili finally broke the silence and asked. But his brother just glanced at him and walked out.

He came back a moment later with a can of white paint. He placed the paint on the table and ignoring Kili completely he pulled out all of his paintings. He later walked into the gallery and took them down one by one.

“What are you doing?” Kili asked as Fili removed the frame and placed one of the paintings on the stall.

“I’m fixing it.” Fili added grimly, and he began over painting the painting white.

“You’re ruining it!” Kili gasped.

“Why keep something that is worthless?” Fili added in a grim voice, as he was finishing over painting the painting.

“It’s your work, you should keep it, not ruin it.” Kili noticed slowly.

“What do you care?” Fili spat at him. “You always hated my paintings, you never liked any of them, so why do you care now?”

“You shouldn’t bring it out on the works. You will regret it later.” Kili told him slowly.

“Just shut the fuck up...” Fili retorted. “I’m done listening to you.”

“We still have a job to finish.” Kili noticed as Fili was ruining the third painting.

“That project is the best of the three.” Fili pointed to the table.

“So you’re just giving up?” Kili asked with spite.

“It’s not like you wanted to do it in the first place.” Fili reminded him. “It was just some sick joke, uncle wanted us to bond or whatever. That one is okay, and who really cares which one will be used. It’s not like we’re going to see it.”

“You’re an idiot.” Kili noticed. “Uncle didn’t want us to bond, he wanted to see if we’ll be able to cooperate. The company will be ours in the future, so in fact what we do with this hotel matters for the company.”

“There is no fucking way we’ll be able to cooperate running the company.” Fili noticed. “We hate each other, and it’ll always be like that.”

“Wouldn’t it be better to prove we can be useful?” Kili gently noticed. “Wouldn’t it feel nice to do this project and one day really go there and see it?”

“You think we’ll be able to do it?” Fili looked puzzled at his brother.

“We started out just fine yesterday. We did decide on a crazy number of designs, but since it’s the two of us, a big budget and four weeks, I think it’s doable.” Kili made him realise.

“You do?” Fili’s eyes were full of hope.

“We have to. There is no way I’ll let uncle separate me from Tauriel.” Kili added with a grin.

“Right...” Fili answered in a meek tone, thinking about his brother’s girlfriend.

“You can ruin all your old paintings later, we have work to do.” Kili gently took the white paint from him and put it away. “Come on.” He extended his hand and when his brother took it, he swiftly guided him out of the room and upstairs into his bedroom. Their joint hands giving them strength and support.

“While you’ve been destroying your old art work, I was searching for ideas online.” Kili told him plugging the laptop to the TV. “You can choose any wallpaper you like.” He told him with a grin and began opening the files.

\----

“Dinner?” Thorin asked walking in the studio. He was surprised to see both boys with a laptop. Kili was pointing to something on the screen and Fili was drawing.

“In a moment.” Fili replied curtly. “I’m finishing our first room.”

“Can I take a look?” Thorin was mildly surprised they got to drawing so fast. Fili gasped and made several corrections and passed the sheet to Thorin.

Thorin glanced at the drawing, it was in a perspective just like classical designs, it was slightly based on the professional designs in terms of format and layout. But it was different. It was different from all the projects he gave them, it was different from Arkenstone and all the other hotels he could think of. The room looked like a cosy bedroom in an elegant house. Anyone would just want to walk in and claim the space as his own. Any woman or man would walk in and feel comfortable and at home. He glanced from the bed, towards the elegant wallpaper, thick carpet. They didn’t miss anything, including curtains, decorations and lighting.

“It’s a good design.” He told them slowly. “Most customers expect something less personal however.”

“So you think guests will not like the decor?” Kili asked surprised.

“I think most people will love it.” Thorin eased the effect his words had. “It’s just a lot different from what people get in other hotels.”

“That’s the idea.” Fili told him. “We don’t want it to look like any other hotel. We want to make it look unique.”

“If you continue this direction it certainly will be unique.” Thorin added. “Let’s go eat, dinner is waiting.”

“I was wondering...” Kili began at dinner. “I talked with Tauriel about this project and she suggested that we probably should go there to see it with our own eyes first. She said it would be best to feel what we want seeing the location and going around the buildings and museums in Madrid.”

“You’re asking me to take you there?” Thorin asked surprised.

“You don’t need to come with us personally.” Kili told him slowly. “It would be nice to skip school on Friday and next Monday, then we could have four days to roam Madrid.”

“Why do I get the feeling your girlfriend will come along?” Thorin asked. “You know you are not suppose to ask for her help.”

“She will not help with anything, she will just accompany us along with her brother.” Kili explained.

“What do you think?” Thorin asked the silent Fili.

“It’s a very good idea.” Fili noticed, but his voice didn’t sound enthusiastic.

“Fine, you may go.” Thorin made the call.

\----

The passing days Fili and Kili made nine of the forty designs they planned to make. They left the special most expensive rooms for the last, when they finally get to feel Madrid’s soul. Apart from drawing and choosing things for the rooms they spent a lot of time watching films about Spain, about the culture and traditions. Fili immediately began catching the language, driving Kili nuts with it. Their mutual relations were very tense, they talked only about the project, trying not to talk about anything personal. That way they weren’t fighting as much as the first day. Sometimes Kili deliberately provoked Fili just for the thrill of toying with him, but it was usually conscious effort to derail him.

Tauriel and Legolas visited them on Wednesday to arrange the details of their trip. Legolas booked everything using their father’s credit card, and they discussed what they want to see and where to go. Fili was slightly surprised how nice Tauriel and her brother were to him, so he stopped his usual witty remarks and listening to them plan out the trip. He just blinked when Legolas booked a suite in a five star hotel, then he glanced at his brother sitting right next to his girlfriend. But they weren’t acting any different than usually, he concluded. And then he realised they acted more like friends than an actual couple.

“We know we can’t help you out, but can we at least see the first projects?” Tauriel asked in a begging voice. Kili glanced to Fili, but his brother just shrugged his shoulders.

“Fine, you can take a look.” Kili told her and gently took her hand and guided her to the studio. She glanced around curiously seeing more of Fili’s works all around.

“I’ve never seen any hotel with this kind of style.” Legolas noticed. “And I’ve seen many hotels.”

“So you two actually managed to sit down and prepare some designs together?” Tauriel gasped seeing the drawings. “I love it!” She leaned in and kissed Kili hastily.

“These designs are very good.” Legolas told them honestly. “I think you know what you should do in the future.” He made them realise.

“I’m not sure we would cooperate well.” Fili gently added glancing at Kili.

“Well if you two would truly learn to cooperate you’d been unstoppable.” Legolas noticed with a grin.

“What are your plans for the evening?” Kili asked them suddenly.

“Why are you asking?” Legolas noticed the rare happy smirk on Kili’s face.

“Let’s watch some films about Spain.” Kili smirked and guided Tauriel into Fili’s room. Legolas stood there frozen with Fili by his side, and both were looking at their joint hands with jealousy. Legolas glanced at Fili, at his tensed posture, at his clenched fists and he smiled a knowing smile.

“Come on!” He gently urged him to follow.

“I’ll bring some drinks and snacks, and I’ll be there soon.” Fili replied in a sad tone as he went towards the kitchen.

“I wish I could hold his hand...” Tauriel told Kili gently as they were alone for a moment.

“I know.” Kili gently replied. “I know exactly how you feel...” He told her slowly.

“So you are in love with someone...” She noticed with a happy grin. “Who is it?” She insisted, but Legolas came in. She noticed his sad face and eyes. “Don’t tell me you’re jealous now...”

“How would you feel if I did something like this...” Legolas gasped irritated, and grabbed Kili’s hand and kissed him deeply.

“What!?” Tauriel shrieked, and a pang of a falling tray could be heard.

“Why did you do that for?!” Kili twisted out of Legolas’s grip.

Tauriel just gasped and sat on the floor right where she was standing. Fili was frozen in the doorway the fallen tray at his feet.

“Just to see the shock on their faces...” Legolas sniggered and lifted the tray with snacks. “Lucky landing.” He noticed looking at the almost untouched tray.

“Drinks?” Legolas asked Fili with a huge smirk.

“They didn’t fit on the tray...” Fili whispered.

“Lucky for you...” Legolas added with a smirk.

“You’re officially crazy!” Tauriel declared. “Next time you feel like kissing my boyfriend, just fucking ask!” She yelled at her brother. “I won’t mind sharing with you...” She added flirtatiously towards Legolas, making him laugh.

“That’s why I love you so much sis... You’re as crazy as me...” Legolas joked.

“You’re both fucked up...” Fili noticed but the craziness of the situation made him laugh wholeheartedly despite the deep sting of jealousy.

“Now you know why I stick around.” Kili told his bother. “I’ll go get the drinks...” He pulled Fili with him.

The moment they were out of the door his smile faded and he looked seriously at his brother. “My friends mean a lot to me, so be nice...” He scolded Fili gently.

“My friends mean a lot to me too...” Fili noticed dully.

“You have many people around you, I only have them.” Kili made him realise. “So no matter how fucked up they might seem to you, keep it to yourself.”

“They are crazy, but cool...” Fili added slowly. “I just hope he doesn’t go around kissing every boy in sight...” He added with a smile.

“Nah, he just likes toying around. Although if I do understand correctly he is bi...” Kili taunted his serious always proper brother. “So playing around with him can be really fun...”

Fili just laughed at that. “I’m not going to do anything to your friendship with them. I’ll be nice and friendly, our problems are our problems.” Fili assured his brother.

“Good.” Kili walked to the kitchen to fetch the drinks.

“Are you coming?” Kili yelled from the kitchen.

“On my way!” Fili yelled back.

“So what would you kid want for dinner?” Bombur asked with a smile.

“Pizza!” Fili insisted.

“Anything for you.” Bombur smiled and passed them a tray with drinks. “I’ll call you when it’s ready.”

“You’re the best!” Fili praised the chef with a wide smile.

Kili slowly walked upstairs.

“Why are you walking so slow?” Fili teased.

“You want me to drop this on your head?” Kili teased back.

Fili opened the door and stepped back so Kili could walk in. He just smiled seeing Tauriel flushed a bit, but at least they didn’t catch them. Kili knew his friends loved the thrill, and making out would be logical in their current situation.

“So what are we going to do?” Tauriel shifted closer to Legolas to give Kili space right next to her, forcing Fili to sit tightly next to Kili at the end of the sofa. Kili was a bit uncomfortable feeling Fili’s leg right next to him, the touch alone sending shivers down his back. Tauriel just grinned at him and clearly she had planned it out. Soon one of her hands was in Legolas’s and the other in Kili’s.

“We’re watching Spanish films.” Fili replied.

“Why not something connected with the Spanish culture, like Cuban?” Legolas suggested.

“We haven’t tried that yet.” Fili noticed and glanced at Kili, slightly cringing seeing Kili’s hand entwined with Tauriel’s.

“Let’s try it then!” Tauriel smiled.

 


	8. Chapter 8

“So the Mirkwoods are here?” Thorin asked after coming home.

“They arrived after school.” Bofur explained. “Now they are all sitting in Fili’s room watching films and eating pizza.”

“Is some pizza left for me?” Thorin asked with a grin.

“Of course!” Bombur smiled and severed him the pizza.

“Come on, it’s time to go home!” Legolas dragged his sister downstairs. “You’ll have all weekend together to get to have fun!”

“Hello Mr. Durin!” Tauriel greeted the older man.

“Tauriel!” Thorin greeted her. “How are the preparations for your trip?” He asked kindly.

“Everything is booked and ready.” She smiled. “We’re leaving tomorrow afternoon.”

“Have fun! I’ll see you at the airport.” Thorin smiled at her kindly.

“Goodnight!” Tauriel bid him goodbye.

Fili was sitting on the sofa still pressed into Kili. The speed at which Legolas pulled Tauriel home, was so abrupt and fast, the brothers were still sitting frozen on the sofa.

“I like your friends.” Fili told him slowly.

“You were nice. I never thought you could be normal.” Kili admitted.

“I’m happy to surprise you.” Fili admitted with a gentle smile.

“Too bad you never were so nice to me...”Kili whispered and got up. He quickly began cleaning the table.

“Let me help you.” Fili got up and put the plates on the tray. “I’m looking forward to this trip.” He finally admitted before opening the door for Kili.

“So am I.” Kili quietly replied.

Thorin just smirked seeing both boys calmly bring in the dirty dishes into the kitchen. They were cooperating, and they weren’t fighting. Removing Dis from the house, and pushing them to spend time together gave good results. Maybe there was a chance for the boys to become real brothers.

The boys didn’t stop to talk, but they greeted him politely, and walked back upstairs saying they had more work.

“Are we going to watch one more film?” Fili gently suggested not willing to separate with his brother so soon.

“A horror?” Kili suggested.

“Fine...” Fili gasped. Fili tried make himself comfortable, but after shifting several times he couldn’t find the right spot to sit.

“If you rest with your legs on the sofa I could do the same from the other side.” Kili suggested with a smirk. He had his notebook in hand and he was scribbling something in it.

Fili shifted several times and gave into the proposition slightly worried their legs would touch, and the feelings that touch might cause in him. Soon he focused on the film, and on the notebook and ideas about what he wanted to do in the next rooms they were planning out.

As the film was progressing and more gruesome scenes were shown he tried to focus on the notebook, but somehow the feel of his brother’s warm legs was clouding his reality. He glanced at his brother and was surprised to see him glaring at him instead of watching the film. He glared back, and they spent a long time just looking deep into each other’s eyes.

“Can I see your notebook?” Fili asked gently. His brother’s eyes turned cold hearing that.

“No.” Kili replied without elaborating. “I think it’s time for bed...” He slowly got up and pulled his notebook and things along. Fili tried to stop him, but the moment he touched his arm Kili nearly jumped out of his skin with surprise.

“Let me help you...” Fili tried to be tactful, feeling in panic that their truce was falling apart within seconds.

“I’m fine on my own.” Kili noticed grimly and left the room.

\----

The next day they drove to school, and left a bit early to pack for their trip. Kili was silent, and Fili didn’t feel like asking him about anything. As the trip was nearing Kili was becoming excited and Fili briefly wondered why such a short trip would cause such a uproar. As Thorin was driving them to the airport, he realised why Kili was so agitated. This was his second trip in a short time, and more so this was his second trip in years. Fili would travel a lot with his mother, but as far as he could remember Kili never came along with them. His mother would always find a good reason to leave him home. Punishment for low grades, punishment for talking back, sometimes she would just not tell him they were going somewhere, and she would thrive seeing his hurt glare when they would leave him behind. Fili always knew he was her favourite, but now he finally realised how unfairly she treated her other son. How hurt Kili must have been to watch them leave every time without him.

“We’re going to have a great time.” Fili gently reached for Kili’s hand. “Stop worrying, everything is going to be fine.”

“I’m not worried about anything.” Kili noticed dully.

“Then smile for a change.” Fili encouraged him smiling his best wide smile. To his surprise Kili responded with a smile as well.

“Happy?” He made a funny grin.

“Yeah.” Fili replied.

Thorin just smirked listening to the friendly exchange.

“Move it, you have just an hour to your flight.” Thorin guided them into the VIP zone.

“Durin!” A voice startled them.

“Mirkwood!” Thorin greeted the tall blond man with a polite smile. “It’s been a long time old friend.”

“You seem to be too busy for old friends.” Thranduil joked lightly, as the two teenagers followed him.

“We have enough time for coffee right now.” Thorin smiled.

“So kids, behave!” Thranduil scolded the teens. “Legolas take care of your sister.”

“I’ll take care of her.” Kili noticed.

“That’s what I’m worried about.” Thranduil laughed.

“Dad, I’m old enough to handle myself!” Tauriel scolded the man with a smile.

“You’ll always be my little girl.” Thranduil smiled. “You keep an eye on her, she likes doing crazy things.” He pointed to Kili with a smile.

“Yes Sir!” Kili saluted causing the Mirkwoods to laugh. Thorin and Fili were surprised with the merry atmosphere between Kili and the Mirkwoods. Clearly Kili have bonded with them better than with his own family.

“I know this is a special mission, but still try to have some fun within reason!” Thorin noticed with a smile.

“We will!” Tauriel smiled and rolled her eyes.

“It’s time to get going.” Thranduil noticed and urged the kids to get up and take their luggage. “Call me as soon as you land!” He instructed Legolas as the oldest of the party.

“We’ll be fine dad!” Legolas smiled, and Fili felt a bit worried with that smile.

“Come on!” Kili urged Fili to move bringing him back to reality.

The flight went by fast, Tauriel placed herself right next to Fili and continuously asked him questions trying to get to know him. She smiled at Kili, who was curiously listening in. “Don’t worry.” Legolas told him with a smirk. “I’ve had it all planned out.”

“That’s what I’m scared of...” Kili noticed with a grin.

Legolas called in a taxi and gave the address to the fancy hotel where they had a suite booked. Kili walked in looking around curiously. This was one of the hotels they’ve seen while designing their new hotel, and seeing it with his own eyes was a great experience just to get the scale of what he and Fili were designing.

Legolas with a wide grin took the keys to their suite and a lobby boy helped them with the luggage. Kili felt suddenly very worried, Legolas was up to something, the question was what.

They glanced around the huge suite. It was like an apartment, it had a huge living room area, and there were two doors to adjoining bedroom. Two bedrooms.

“This must be some kind of mistake.” Fili noticed glancing into one of the rooms.

“Oops.” Legolas gasped trying to seem worried.

“You ass!” Tauriel gently nudged him. Kili just raised his eyebrows and glanced into the big bedroom with a huge double bed in the middle.

“How are we going to do this?” Kili asked glancing at Legolas suspiciously.

“Let’s call them and see if anything else is available.” Fili suggested.

“It was one of the last suites empty.” Legolas noticed still trying to seem surprised. “So I doubt they have anything else vacant...” He added in a grim voice.

“It’s not like we’re strangers!” Tauriel join in. “I’m taking this room.” She dragged her bags inside.

“And you’re not sleeping with my sister...” Legolas added glancing at Kili with a smirk.

Fili and Kili stood in front of the double bed in their room and both could think of only one thing, meaning how to get out of this mess.

“Can we manage somehow?” Fili asked worried.

“We’ll have to.” Kili whispered back in a grim tone. “We might as well work all night and wait till we drop dead. That way we might forget about this... inconvenience.”

“We’re adults, let’s treat this like adults.” Fili tried to assure his brother he was not going to make a fuss.

“Just fucking great...” Kili added, but Fili could not help but wonder what he meant.

“Let’s go, we’re going to town!” Tauriel marched into their room dressed in a very short red dress.

“And I thought you only do black!” Fili noticed surprised.

“Only for school and dad!” She smiled warmly. “I have to keep up my image, here no one knows me. Change into something more comfortable, first dinner and then we’re dancing!” She twirled around Kili and left them alone again.

“Dancing?” Fili looked stunned.

“She loves dancing...” Kili informed him with a grin. “I’m taking the bathroom, you can change here.” He searched his luggage for something appropriate for the occasion.

Kili came back as Fili was pulling on a t-shirt. He got the sight of his brother’s bare back, with firmly lined muscles and delicate pale skin. He glanced at Fili in tight fitting jeans and a blue t-shirt. He looked gorgeous, even more so than normal. Around mother he wore more conservative classic clothes, but in these he looked simply stunning.

“No black?” Fili joked seeing Kili in a green t-shirt and tight fitting grey jeans.

“It’s my time off.” Kili noticed with a smirk. “Let’s go, I’m hungry!”

“Hey, there is a great Spanish restaurant nearby, and I found a music club playing modern Spanish club music.” Legolas told them, and took Tauriel under his arm. Kili grabbed Tauriel’s hand and the three of them walked joint together, making Fili feel a bit rejected.

Kili noticed the sad face Fili made and extended his hand towards him. Fili hesitated for a moment, but later let their arms entwine. Tauriel smiled at that, and used the first chance to let go of Kili’s hand, not to be too obvious. She could hear Legolas giggle next to her, and she snuggled closer to him. They reached the restaurant and got a nice table on the terrace. It was much warmer than in Britain, so they felt comfortable outside and ordered a few strange sounding Spanish dishes in agreement they would share and try everything.

Fili was surprised how nice Tauriel and Legolas really were, but the real surprise was Kili. He had never seen him so relaxed and open. As if all his defences were down, as if he dropped the act and behaved like he really was. He was happy, smiling, witty. He was so different than at home, or school, that Fili felt he wanted to keep this cheerful Kili.

They ate, they chatted, and they laughed. Kili kept glancing at his brother surprised how nice Fili could be. He was relaxed, as if the game he was playing was paused. As if there was no one to pretend in front of. As if all the problems of their reality were left home, as if they were just two people sitting and having a great dinner. As if this was a double date. That last though hit Kili with its irrationality. Fili had no idea Tauriel and Legolas were an item, and he never showed any symptoms of liking him. For all he knew Kili was straight and in a relationship with Tauriel, and her joking around with her brother would never be classified as flirting by any normal person. He only guessed there was something going on, because his own thoughts had been venturing that direction. He could feel Tauriel and Legolas plotting to set him up with Fili. They both probably seen through his defences, but the thought that Fili might respond to this strategy was irrational.

“Let’s go, I need to lose all those calories!” Tauriel gasped and took Kili’s hand.

“Calories run away from you!” Kili noticed with a grin.

“Follow me.” Legolas guided them towards a club nearby. It took a wad of cash and within a second they were in. “No drinking, it’s risky enough that we’re here.” Legolas scolded them before pulling Tauriel to the dance floor where many people were going crazy to the rhythm of some strange music.

“I’ve never been to a place like this.” Fili, the always proper boy, seemed lost enough to confess that to his most hated brother.

“It’s high time the good boy did something crazy...” Kili grinned and grabbed his hand and pulled him onto the dance floor.

“I have no idea how to dance to this...” Fili just stood there frozen.

“Neither do I, it’s just about having fun!” Kili grabbed him and spun him around. “Come on, it’s not that difficult, you should have it in your blood somewhere...” It took a while for Fili to grasp what was going on, but after a moment he gave in and tried to relax in the beat. Kili just rewarded him with a smile. After three songs Tauriel showed up and grabbed Fili and with a huge grin got him to dance a slower song with her, leaving Kili to a smiling Legolas.

“What are you up to?” Kili asked feeling Legolas’s arms go around him.

“I asked Tauriel...” Legolas gasped.

“What did you ask her?” Kili asked him trying not to yell despite the noise.

“If I could fuck you...” Legolas sensually pressed against Kili. “You know I’m bisexual...”

“I know...” Kili replied. “What did she say?”

“She says she can share you with me, and me with you...” He gently nudged Kili’s neck and licked his skin.

Kili just laughed at that. “I’m not sure I want to be shared...” He joked lightly.

“I know... I already know what you want...” Legolas whispered to him. “And if you pretend to like this, you might get it sooner...” He said gently groping Kili’s ass.

“I like you.” Legolas whispered to him sensually. “And if you haven’t realised, I’d love to fuck you. So if you’d like to lose your virginity... I can arrange that.”

“You’re a sweetheart.” Kili noticed with a grin. “But as much as I like you, I’m not into fucking you...”

“Let’s test that... for our mutual pleasure...” Legolas gasped and pulled him even closer sealing their lips together. Kili was tempted to pull back, but the press of the lips wasn’t unpleasant. It was his first real kiss, and feeling the tongue enter his mouth he gasped involuntarily. It was wrong on some level, but his general tendency was gay, so the feel of the male body pressing into him was thrilling. Legolas was handsome, he was fun and daring. And it was evident he was excited with what they were doing now, his erection was pressing into Kili gently sending a signal Legolas was seriously interested.

“We would have so much fun...” Legolas gasped letting his lips free.

“No thank you.” Kili replied with a kind smirk.

“Well, if you ever change your mind...” Legolas gently kissed him again. “Tauriel will share me only with you...” He turned his head to see Fili glaring at them with hate in his eyes. “But it seems your brother won’t share you with anyone...”

“You’re so cute when you’re jealous.” Tauriel noticed with a smirk.

“I’m not jealous.” Fili scolded her firmly.

“Oh but you are.” Tauriel gently nudged him, she was wrapped tightly around him, and she could feel absolutely no reaction, to the moment Legolas began making out with Kili on the dance floor. She suddenly felt Fili go stiff and aroused at the same time.

Fili glared at her, and she glared back. “It takes someone crazy, to spot someone equally crazy. I knew Kili was like us before, but I never realised what was hidden under your good boy mask.” With ever word Tauriel said Fili’s mask was slowly coming back on. “Be our friend, and we’ll be your friends back.”

“I’m not crazy.” Fili gasped.

“And you’re going to try to convince me you didn’t become aroused just by looking at them kissing?” Tauriel joked lightly kissing Fili on the lips. “Girls don’t work for you, do they?”

He just glared back, and didn’t answer.

“Just as I though.” Tauriel sniggered and guided him towards Legolas and Kili. She grabbed Legolas’s neck and pulled him away, pushing Fili into Kili’s arms.

“Strike three.” Tauriel gasped.

“Are your friends always this intrusive?” Fili asked Kili in a sore throat. They stopped dancing and stood at the bar.

“Sorry about them.” Kili gasped suddenly shy.

“If you’d like to be alone with them, just say a word. I don’t want to intrude into this crazy triangle.” Fili gasped standing so close no one else could overhear.

“It’s not like that at all.” Kili told him with his head lowered. “They just like to mess with people, and because you’re so proper you’re the perfect target.”

“And that was just normal?” Fili’s voice was very high.

“No.” Kili admitted. “They never acted like that before.”

“You’re not leaving me alone with them.” Fili ordered his brother in a strained tone.

“As you wish.” Kili admitted.

“Let’s go back to the hotel, I’ve had enough.” Fili asked in a pleading tone.

“Let’s just leave them here, they know the way.” Kili noticed with a smirk and took Fili’s hand.

“Hi handsome!” A tall man stopped right next to Fili. “Why don’t you ditch your boyfriend and come have some fun?”

“Smaug!” Legolas yelled at the man.

“Oh Thranduil’s boy!” The man smiled. “What are you doing here?” He leaned against the counter with a smirk.

“Just passing through with some friends.” Legolas spoke slowly, standing in between himself and his sister.

“You’re into girls now?” The man’s voice was provocative and flirtatious. “Why don’t you introduce us?”

“Maybe next time!” Legolas smirked and pulled Fili away from the man. Tauriel and Kili swiftly followed.

“Who the hell was that?” Kili gasped the moment they exited the club.

“A very dangerous man.” Legolas told him slowly. “Let me say it this way, if you ever see him again do not talk to him and get out.”

“That was Smaug?” Tauriel gasped. “The guy who was dad’s lover like twenty years ago?”

“Yup.” Legolas confirmed.

“Who is he?” Kili asked.

“He’s somehow connected with the Russian mafia, he is known for dangerous friends and fucking anything that moves and has legs.” Legolas slowly told them.

Kili grabbed Fili’s hand for comfort, somehow meeting such an aggressive predator made him feel scared. Fili looked at Kili surprised and just held his hand tighter.

“No more clubs.” Tauriel decided.

“Agreed. We party in our suite.” Legolas smiled.

“Just fucking great...” Kili noticed.

“The target is a foursome anyway...” Legolas smiled flirtatiously.

“You wish!” Kili scolded him.

“Actually I do... My day will come...” Legolas spoke in hushed tone.

“Dream on!” Fili retorted firmly, still holding Kili’s hand for support.

“Suit yourself!” Tauriel smirked and pulled Legolas into their bedroom as soon as they made it to the hotel suite.

“That was the most fucked up evening ever...” Fili gasped and walked lifeless into their shared bedroom.

 


	9. Chapter 9

“May I come in?” Kili asked hesitantly.

“It’s your room as well.” Fili spoke in a deep hushed tone, his eyes on the huge double bed in the middle. “Those two fuckers set us up, didn’t they?”

“They did.” Kili admitted with a lowered head. “I’m sorry.”

“I find it amusing your own friends would put you in such a position.” Fili sighed with annoyance.

“They find this kind of stuff exciting.” Kili admitted shyly. “So how are we going to do this? I can sleep on the couch or on the floor...” He proposed feeling at bit guiltily it was his friend who set them up.

“The bed is big enough.” Fili noticed sternly, trying not to think about what that implicated.

“You should go shower first, I’ll unpack a bit.” Kili told him slowly.

“Fine!” Fili grabbed a clean towel and went in. Kili glanced at the closed door and finally let out a breath. He went out of the room and walked to the other room, he knocked on the door.

“What?” Legolas stepped out shirtless.

“If you ever mess with Fili like that again I’ll kill you.” Kili spoke in a firm tone, sounding so much like Thorin no one would doubt he was the heir of Durin.

“Copy that.” Legolas admitted. “Anything else, I’m kind of busy?”

“My secrets are my secrets, if you play me, I’ll make you regret crossing my path.” Kili taunted him.

“I’m glad you finally got the guts to say stuff like that. I’m your friend, believe it or not.” Legolas told him.

“Goodnight.” Kili returned to his room swiftly. He grabbed some of his stuff and began arranging them in the wardrobe. He pulled out his sketchbook and hid it under the clothes. Soon Fili came back, clean and dressed for bed.

“Bathroom is empty.” Fili told him and lay down in bed taking his laptop.

“I’m still planning to work a bit.” Fili told him.

“Great give me twenty and I’ll join you.” Kili told him and rushed to the bathroom.

When he came out he took his laptop and jumped into bed on the empty side.

“So what are you browsing?” Kili asked.

“Bathroom tiles.” Fili told him. “I was thinking of mixing traditional Spanish, maybe even going into Moroccan, and contrasting it with clear white tiles and perfect white utilities.”

“I have a program somewhere to design bathrooms, we can load the tiles into it and do a 3D project.” Kili began searching his laptop. “Send the tiles you like best and let’s put it all together. Do you have the sizes of the bathrooms?”

“They are somewhere here.” Fili passed him a folder with some papers.

They did four projects, slowly shifting closer and closer to each other. They were now sitting side by side and glancing at each other’s laptop.

“Let’s call it a night. I’m falling asleep...” Fili told him after a while. “Tomorrow is another busy day with your crazy friends.”

“I’m sorry again...” Kili tried to apologise yet again.

“It’s not your fault.” Fili noticed calmly turning off his laptop and putting it away.

“In a way it is... “ Kili gasped and lay down comfortable.

“Turn off the light.” Fili told him.

“No bed time story?” Kili complained with a smile.

“I’m not your automatic audio book.” Fili joked and tried to find a comfortable position.

“So why aren’t you sharing a room with Tauriel?” Fili suddenly asked.

“We haven’t been together like that yet.” Kili slowly told him.

“I noticed.” Fili admitted. “What was that exactly with Legolas?” He tried to sound uninterested.

“Legolas is bi.” Kili told him.

“Are you bi?” Fili demanded in a firm tone.

“No, I’m not.” Kili replied slowly, but Fili did not continue, he had hear enough. In his mind he already added two plus two, and the result was Kili didn’t like boys. His heart ached, but he just tried to hide it best he could.

Fili shifted onto his side, but for a long time sleep didn’t come. His brother’s presence was making him aroused, but the seemingly sleeping figure on the other side of the bed was motionless.

He moved a bit closer, and the moment his legs touched the legs of his brother he felt even more aroused. Then Kili surprised him shifting in his sleep. He gasped something and pressed a bit into Fili as if seeking warmth.

Fili smiled taking comfort for the gentle contact, and soon sleep took him.

Kili fell asleep surprisingly fast, but in the middle of the night he suddenly awoke. He felt strange, on one hand he was very warm from one side, on the other hand he could hear strange sounds as if someone was sobbing. Then he felt the heat shift rapidly. He turned to take a look at his brother, and found him asleep but crying. His prefect beautiful brother was sobbing and mumbling something under his nose. He was having a nightmare. Kili gently reached and shook him, awaking him. As Fili was returning to consciousness, he seems so scared and lost that Kili pulled him into his arms.

“You’re okay...” He gently whispered to him. “I’m here and you’re safe.” He assured his brother gently.

“I’m sorry for waking you...” Fili was still sobbing.

“It’s okay.” Kili gently caressed his hair. “Do you often get nightmares like that?”

“Not often.” Fili lied.

“Do you want to talk about it?’ Kili gently asked.

“Not really...” Fili hugged him tighter finding comfort in the warm embrace. Comfort he didn’t have ever in his life. Comfort he didn’t have in his childhood and later living at his mother’s house.

“You’re safe...” Kili whispered to him softly and continued to stroke his back. “I’m here for you.”

Fili looked up to him finally calming down. “I’m sorry for this...”

“It’s really okay.” Kili gently brushed a tress of blond hair from his eyes. “Everyone has nightmares.”

Fili looked him straight in the eyes taking in the face of his brother in the dark. He glanced at his lips, still remembering the deep kiss Kili shared with Legolas. He kept wondering what that felt like, to kiss someone. His eyes were filled with so much longing and love, that subconsciously he sent a message his brother subconsciously received. When Kili’s lips gently touched his, he felt his heart almost explode. The gentle gesture felt so divine, the soft touch so sensible and so loving. Fili gave into the kiss, gently lifting himself to press deeper.

Kili gasped and shifted to lie more on Fili, pressing their bodies tightly together, and deepening the kiss. He finally had what he wanted, and he wanted his brother for so long, that now it seemed to be in heaven. He stopped thinking, he just gave into the soft press of lips which soon turned to soft touches.

Fili had no idea what was going on, the soft touch turned into a flow of lava. Soon the kiss wasn’t enough, he had dreamt about this so many times that the kiss was like an appetizer. The vivid reaction he got from Kili, proved he wasn’t alone on it. The press of his brother’s firm body, so attractive and so aroused was driving him crazy.

Not before long they were naked, touching each other in a way both dreamt about, discovering their bodies. They were struggling for dominance, but soon it didn’t really matter, what mattered was the friction. They were aroused, and as Kili held their erections together and they pressed hundreds of kisses, it didn’t matter if there was any penetration of not. It was just the touch of their warm bodies and the fact that finally they were doing it together. They held together tightly as their cum gently soiled their bodies. Kili gasped and laid his head on Fili’s shoulder. Fili felt dizzy with all the emotion in him. Soon they feel asleep holding each other tightly.

“That was... not planned.” Fili told his brother when they woke up in the morning.

Kili giggled carefree hearing that strained comment. Fili just laughed with him.

“This changes things.” Fili finally told him.

“For the better I hope.” Kili noticed. “Let’s get cleaned.” He reached for Fili’s hand and pulled him into the bathroom.

“What are you?” Fili was surprised.

“We’re having a shower together. Saves time and water.” Kili giggled and pulled him along.

Fili just glanced at him surprised, blinked one and then twice, and finally let go of what was proper and not proper and joined in only to be greeted with a million tender kisses.

“You’re crazy...” He told his brother with a grin.

“It seems were finally equal in one thing.” Kili gasped as he pressed against him rubbing Fili’s erection with his hand. Fili laughed gently and played along leaving all his reservations back in England.

“What took you both so long?” Tauriel greeted them warmly pointing towards breakfast already waiting for them.

“We worked till the dead of night.” Fili told them slowly.

“Then eat up, we have a busy day today.” Legolas urged them to eat.

“Any coffee?” Kili asked stretching lazily.

“You seem enthusiastic.” Legolas sniggered.

“Our project can’t wait.” Kili noticed with a smirk. “So what’s today’s plan?”

“We’re going to see the construction site. Call your uncle to warn the contractor we’re coming.” Tauriel told them. “Later lunch, and after lunch we’re visiting the Royal Academy, Museum of Industrial design and Modern Art.”

“After that it’s another restaurant for dinner, and the club again.” Legolas added.

“I’ll pass on the club.” Fili quickly added.

“Me too, we’ve got lots of work to do.” Kili explained.

“Don’t become boring just because your brother is here!” Tauriel scolded him. “We can party here instead.”

Fili just raised his brows and continued eating.

After breakfast he went back to his room and pulled out his camera and notebook with pencils. He packed it all into a backpack.

“Are you ready?” Kili asked with tenderness in his voice.

“Yup.” Fili gently avoided his embrace and walked out. Kili glanced at his disappearing brother, he gathered his bag and notebook.

“Hey uncle, we’re heading towards the construction site, call them.” Fili told Thorin on the phone from the taxi.

“I’ll announce you. Just try not to give the main contactor a heart attack.” Thorin told him with a smirk. “Have fun!”

“I’m not here for fun, I’m here for work.” Fili replied imitating Thorin’s serious business tone.

Thorin glanced at the phone surprised, his serious always behaving Fili showed that he had a sense of humour first time in his life.

“That was hilarious!” Tauriel praised Fili.

“Wait till you see the face of the contractor that four teenagers are going to inspect the site.” Legolas added with a grin as they were arriving.

A tall serious blond man was standing in front of the boarded fence. The tall building could be seen behind it.

“I think they are ahead of schedule.” Kili noticed. “That looks like fifteen floors already.”

“Mr. Steward?” Fili asked the tall man. “I’m Fili Durin, this is my brother Kili Durin and our friends. We’re here to inspect the site.”

The man blinked and looked at them seriously.

“Is this some kid of joke?” The man asked finally. “Thorin always had a twisted sense of humour, but this is big even for him.”

“Nope, it’s not a joke Mr. Steward.” Kili told him seriously.

“Call me Boromir. Put on these helmets for safety purposes.” He gave them the helmets. “Follow me.”

“You seem to be ahead of schedule.” Fili told the man perfectly imitating Thorin business tone. “According to the schedule you should be now finishing the eleventh floor.”

“The schedule is planned taking many things into consideration. Weather conditions have been favourable so we managed to speed up a bit. What part interests you the most?” He asked.

“We want to see everything.” Kili insisted.

“I can’t let you to the last floor due to safety regulations, but we can pretty much see everything else.” Boromir led them around the construction. He told them everything about the construction, treating them as if they were a serious inspection. He seemed mildly surprised when Fili began taking photos of the views from the windows, and Kili began scribbling something in his notebook. But he just continued to tell them about everything connected with the building. They finished the tour around noon, and then Legolas called for a taxi to pick them up and drive them to the restaurant for lunch.

“The building is pretty amazing.” Tauriel admitted eating lunch. “I had no idea your job was going to be that big.”

“Me neither.” Kili noticed. “Seeing it in real life changes my perspective on many things.”

“I like the building, but I’m not really sure I feel like Museums all day.” Legolas finally told them.

“We can manage just the two of us.” Fili noticed quickly. “It’s not hard to get a taxi and give the right address.”

“You won’t be mad at us?” Tauriel smiled at them. “I’d love to go shopping.”

“We can meet at seven at the restaurant. Give me your notebook I’ll write down the address.” Legolas told them and scribbled the address in Kili’s notebook. “Here are the printouts about the museums, the addresses and prices included.”

“Are you both sure it’s okay?” Tauriel asked unsure of herself.

“We’ll be fine.” Kili assured her.

Legolas and Tauriel later got into a taxi, and Fili and Kili into another one. Fili easily managed to tell the driver where they wanted to go in Spanish, his brother looking at him jealously.

They began from the Industry museum, and they spent a long time there. Fili was fascinated with many designs, patters and colour setting, and Kili was drawing in his notebook with equal zeal. The second and third museums were typical galleries with paintings, so although interesting they did not change much in their perspective for the hotel.

Fili was a little startled when Kili took his hand in public, but Kili just smiled happily at him, so he could only smile back. They walked around the centre of the old city, taking photos of buildings and analyzing the architecture. Fili felt happy for a change, somehow just walking around, holding Kili’s hand and admiring the old architecture set him at peace. Kili seemed very happy, he was radiating and smiling, Fili had never seen him like that ever before, and the happiness was infectious.

When it was time to take a taxi and get to the restaurant, Fili felt a bit disappointed, but then again they had all night together again.

“So were the Museums any interesting?” Tauriel gasped as they finally joined them at the table.

“Fascinating.” Kili smiled happily.

“Have you eaten a tone of chocolate to make you this happy?” Legolas joked.

“Just seen like several hundred paintings.” Kili told him.

“Use Google next time.” Legolas sniggered. “We already ordered six dishes by random, so we’re tasting again.”

“Great, I’m hungry!” Fili noticed calmly.

“Men are so easy to satisfy...” Tauriel noticed in a mocking tone. “Food, sex and no work, and you’re all delighted with life.”

“How would I know?” Kili mocked her back.

“How would any of us know, since we’ve never really worked or had sex?” Legolas joked in a mocking tone.

“Speak for yourself.” Fili taunted back with ease. Kili blinked looking at his brother, seeing him from a different perspective. A thrilling confident Fili. A Fili with a backbone and a sense of humour and character.

“Yeah right Mr. Perfect!” Tauriel taunted him back using the nickname Kili gave him.

“Pure perfection in its purest form.” Fili spoke with a posh British tone.

“You’re too much! I finally see how you two are related.” Tauriel noticed with a smirk. “So are you going dancing with us?”

“Not a chance.” Kili replied with a grin.

“So we’ll come back in a few hours and if you two will be still up, we’ll drink a beer or two.” Legolas proposed.

“Sound cool.” Fili noticed.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear Readers - I've written a very strong version of this story, but I'm unhappy with it. What would you prefer? A) the school assuming Kili was molested by Thorin and persecuting him, or B) Kili running away? I'm stuck with writing because of this conflict in me - so I beg you help me decide!


	10. Chapter 10

The four of them took a taxi back to the hotel, Tauriel decided she had to change her clothes to go out.

“So what are we doing tonight?” Kili asked his brother with a grin.

“I want to redraw some patterns and try to load them into your fancy program...” Fili told him.

“You’d have to design them on my laptop and pad, we have no method of scanning here.” Kili noticed.

“I’ve never used that kind of stuff...” Fili admitted.

“It’s not much different than drawing, let me show you.” Kili spoke with a smile and pulled out his equipment.

“It’s really easy!” Fili admitted after practising for an hour.

“Go ahead and work on my laptop.” Kili encouraged him.

“What are you planning to do?” Fili asked glancing at his brother.

“I’ll keep browsing on your laptop.” Kili told him taking Fili’s laptop. “I hope you don’t keep any porn here...”

Fili just raised his eyebrows. “Nope!” He finally replied.

“Your system is tragic!” Kili noticed. “When we come home I can fix it for you.”

“You can?” Fili asked surprised.

“I’m in IT classes, and I really like IT.” Kili admitted. “And IT likes me.”

“I’d like that.” Fili told him slowly. “But first I have to copy some files.”

“I need my CDs which are at home anyway, so don’t worry...” Kili smiled to him.

After three hours they could hear Legolas and Tauriel walk into the suite.

“Hey you missed a great party!” Legolas told them.

“Great if you like spending time with a paedophile and your father’s past lover...” Tauriel sniggered.

“Smaug can be very nice...” Legolas corrected her.

“Only when he wants to fuck someone...” Tauriel noticed.

“I’m double glad we weren’t there...” Fili noticed dryly.

“Beer or vodka?” Legolas proposed opening a bag.

“Beer.” Kili replied firmly. “We’re not drinking vodka.” He made the call for everyone.

“You’re sometimes as proper as your brother Mr. Perfect here...” Legolas sniggered.

“Consider it genetic!” Fili retorted swiftly with a smile.

“You’re both fucking unbelievable!” Tauriel grabbed their necks and kissed their cheeks, first Kili and then Fili. “That’s why I like you both so much!” She added and pulled out the glasses from the hotel bar along with some orange juice.

Legolas handed a beer to each of the brothers.

“So has this trip given you the ideas to finish your project?” Tauriel asked curiously.

“More than I thought possible.” Fili admitted. “It was a very good idea.”

“Why you’re welcome!” Tauriel smiled at him sincerely. Fili just smirked at her assuming he was thanking her.

“Tomorrow three more museums and I was thinking of driving towards the Basque region to see the architecture and designs there.” Legolas explained their further plans.

“You’ve really prepared this trip thoroughly.” Fili praised him.

“You speak Spanish after several films and two days here, and I’m good at planning.” Legolas noticed with a grin.

“And plotting...” Kili added with a smile.

“That too...” Legolas admitted.

They stayed up and chatted a longer while, after an hour Tauriel said she was tired and soon she and Legolas went to their bedroom.

“So are we working a bit more or going to sleep?” Fili asked his brother slowly.

“I was thinking about a third option...” Kili noticed with a grin and jump into Fili’s lap. His brother glared at him surprised. But before he could say anything Kili kissed him tenderly.

“Not here...” Fili finally gasped in between kisses.

“Come on!” Kili pulled him towards the bedroom. He glanced at the shopping bag next to the bed and his mind praised Tauriel, she was way too observant and good at strategy.

“Maybe we shouldn’t...” Fili suddenly said before Kili pulled him down onto the bed.

Kili just looked at him sternly and kissed him again. “Tell me you don’t want it...” He pressed against his brother sensually, it was evident they were both equally aroused.

“I...” Fili tried to think but his mind was clouded with lust already. Kili pressed him into the bed and he grinned.

“I thought so...” Kili kissed him deeply, and he felt the vivid response from his brother.

In between taking off their clothes and caressing every centimetre of skin, they didn’t speak. It was all about touching and tasting. It was all about what they both though impossible, and unrequited. Now as their mutual lust was being shared, it was growing as well. Fili was so focused on his brother’s touch he completely lost touch of reality. It did not matter where they were, who they were, only that they were together. Kili felt exactly the same thing, to finally have his dreams come true made it all seem surreal. It gave another dimension to their connection.

“I want to do it fully.” Kili finally gasped.

“What do you mean?” Fili gasped feeling Kili’s hand on his erection.

“You know what I mean. You’re smart enough to know how this works.” Kili taunted him touching him more firmly.

“I never thought about it... or how it should work.” Fili admitted.

“Who said anything about thinking, let’s do it...” Kili gasped and pressed harder against him. “We got all we need...” He pulled out a bottle of lube and condoms.

“I’m scared...” Fili admitted.

“So am I.” Kili told him slowly. “I’m scared I will wake up and find this to be a dream. So as long as this dream lasts I want to make the best of it...”

Fili glanced at him worried. “I...”

“I’ll be on bottom.” Kili finally told him. “First...” He made a wide grin.

“You’re evil!” Fili laughed.

“If I’m evil, so are you...” Kili made him realise their lust was mutual in all aspects.

“So how do we do it?” Fili seemed lost.

“I’ve read about it, it’s all about preparation, and then it shouldn’t hurt...” Kili explained.

Fili looked at him with worry. “Let’s just play around and see if we get that far...” He finally suggested.

“Fine...” Kili gasped and pulled him over his body.

They didn’t go all the way, soon it was clear they were too aroused to actually try anal sex. Within minutes they go so worked up with the very idea, that touching and grinding against each other drove both of them crazy. In between kisses and pressing against each other soon it was clear they both didn’t have the patience. As they lay closely covered in each other’s cum, they held hands and drifted into peaceful sleep.

Fili awoke in the morning and glanced at his sleeping brother. His emotions were all mixed up. He still hated him, he was still irritating and strange. Getting to know him closer proved that Kili was even more crazy than he though him to be. He was unpredictable, witty and daring. He had no borders when it came to sex. He was far more cheerful than at home, and the radiant happy smile made Fili feel like walking on air. Especially when the smile was directed only to him. He had no idea what kind of relationship was between Tauriel and Kili but he was grateful they weren’t showing affection openly. The funny games Tauriel and Legolas were playing seemed to distract him from the actual relationship between Tauriel and Kili. He felt torn, his heart was opening up to the brother he hated all his life. The brother he envied when he was living with dad, and the brother he despised after he moved in with his mother. Somehow next to him his nightmares didn’t bother him as much as normally. Somehow the warm feeling of the body pressing into him soothed his agitated heart and soul. Somehow under the hate he could feel love awake, and that was even more terrifying than the idea of fucking his own brother. There was no way this was normal, and there was no way he could ever let anyone ever find out about his feelings. He gently traced the hair on his brother’s head, he was absolutely adorable. And Fili had to stop the madness.

“I love you...” Kili gently whispered as Fili was gently removing his hair from his face. Fili was scared Kili awoke, but he just shifted a bit and hugged him tighter. Fili’s heart fell hearing those words, there was no way he could let this continue.

His resolve lasted only an hour. When Kili finally awoke and stretched, and beamed a huge smile to him, Fili’s heart melted again. He was so cute and the happy smile made him seem even more beautiful. His brother was fucking beautiful, that was the only conscious though Fili had as Kili pulled him into the shower again, and made love to him again.

That was the only though ringing in Fili’s head as they ate breakfast, went around town to see the museums and later drove to Basque region with Tauriel and Legolas. Everything seemed fucking perfect as he took hundreds of photos of the beautiful Spanish countryside and views, and he wished Kili could be in every single one. As they spent another night together wrapped tightly in each other’s arms after a long session of gentle love, as they played around together kissing and testing and discovering.

As their trip was slowly coming to an end, and as the ideas were developing into solid form, Fili heart felt like dying. Everything he believed in, everything he was taught to believe as right, was rejected by the deep feelings in his heart. By the longing, loving and feeling as if this was the only right thing in his life. That the only thing that mattered was the soft press of Kili’s lips, the gentle touch which made his body burn. By the time they landed, got into the car and drove back home. By the time he entered the doorway to their home, him mind finally drew the one conclusion - he was fucking crazily in love with his own brother and he had to stop the madness.

 


	11. Chapter 11

Kili felt a difference in Fili the moment they walked into the house. In Spain Fili was the real Fili, calm, relaxed, fun loving and witty. Fili in Spain was the perfect lover and boyfriend, because Kili could never call the state when they made love as him being his brother. He was so fun and adorable that instead of hundreds of drawings of Spain, he had two full notebooks of a happy Fili, a Fili so happy and fun like never before.

But now it felt different. The moment Fili walked in the smile was replaced with the fake one. His eyes were no longer happy, but instead he could see resolve and stubbornness in them. As if Fili had made the final decision about something. And Kili soon found out about what, the moment he tried to kiss him when they sat down again to work, he felt the pain of rejection. Fili’s face became pale and his eyes shone with anger. Then he whispered the words Kili prayed never to hear.

“Don’t you ever do anything like that again.” Fili spoke firmly.

Kili just gazed at him with pain in his eyes. “Back home we’re back to the hate?” He asked saddened.

“That was just a moment of madness, a moment of weakness.” Fili spoke through clenched teeth.

“And you do not welcome any madness or weakness in your life...” Kili summed up grimly. “So I’m just a weakness to you? Our love is just a burden?”

“What love?” Fili asked in a tensed tone. “You were just there to relive the tension.”

“So I was just an easy fuck?” Kili asked on the verge of breaking down.

“It’s not like we really fucked.” Fili noticed clearly indicating why they didn’t do it fully.

“You’re a heartless bastard.” Kili just told him with spite in his voice as he ran to his room to cry his heart out.

Fili sat there for a moment trying to ignore the huge pain he felt in his heart, but this had to be done. Things had to be set back in the right perspective. The madness had to end, and the heartache couldn’t last forever. There was no fucking way this heartache would last forever. Because if it did it would mean his heart was right after all... that Kili was the only love for him.

The next days blurred in a phase of pain for both of them, they were no longer talking, the only thing making them sit down together was the project. They were slowly finishing, both pouring all their love into the project. It was slowly clarifying and the last rooms were the most passionate and interesting.

Thorin supervised them with a smile taking in the exotic and original project both boys were preparing. He had never seen such a daring design for a hotel, and glancing at the sophisticated project he felt thrilled it was created by his own nephews. The result of the experiment proved to be more than satisfying. They boys proved they could cooperate, they proved they could work together, but the stunning project was proof they were both extremely talented. He had his decision already, but he wanted to set one more test in front of them.

He called the board meeting at the deadline of the project. He invited all the important directors like Gloin, Oin, Dori, but also his design department members. The projects they were doing were now so lifeless he was actually considering firing all of them and giving the next projects to Kili and Fili. But he knew that was unrealistic considering the fact that the boys still had to finish school.

As Kili and Fili were facing the meeting, with the task to convince nearly twenty people to their project, it was Fili who took the lead. He felt it as a challenge, and his people skills gave him the strength to show their project and explain why they did it that way.

“According to research customers want to stay in a neutral background.” The director of the design department clearly felt threatened and attacked the unprofessional project prepared by two teenagers.

“What research?” Kili suddenly asked taking the floor for the first time. “After reading seven surveys my conclusions are opposite to yours. People want to stay in an friendly environment. They want to relax and switch off completely feeling comfortable and cosy. I’m not sure in how many top class hotels have you actually stayed in, but we have experienced many.” He easily referred to the status of their family. “And we feel most comfortable in a cosy environment. This design is not about a job or making money. We designed a hotel in which we would both like to stay for our holidays.”

“Since this hotel belongs to our family we wanted to show what he think is class and style. We wanted to show what makes us relax and feel comfortable, and when showing some of the design to our friends we were assured any of them would prefer to stay in this kind of setting.” Fili supported his brother immediately.

“The design is stimulating in a Spanish oriented style, giving the guests a feel of Spain in any part of their room. Starting from the wallpapers to the bathroom. It’s the epiphany of comfort.” Kili added supplementing his brother’s speech.

“What about the price of commissioning?” The director of the design department asked. “Most material and patterns presented would have to be custom made.”

“And that would make the hotel unique. All the patterns are copyright, hand drawn by Fili.” Kili indicated it was his brother who drew them. “The cost does not exceed the budget for the last hotel, we already contacted several manufacturers who are more than willing to produce them at reasonable prices.”

“I have made my decision.” Thorin interrupted the interrogation. “I love this project, and it’s much more than I thought capable from my boys. We will do it, and as head of the design department you Mrs. Kendell will be responsible for seeing the project done.” The woman just grinded her teeth clearly irritated. “And if you don’t think you are capable, I will point another person in your department to take over.” The woman lowered her head and did not reply for a longer time. Finally Thorin made the call. “Mr. Lindir you will take responsibility for this project and you will personally see it done.” He made the final call before the woman could protest.

“With pleasure Mr. Durin.” The dark haired man replied with a smile. “It’s a magnificent project.” He added clearly very pleased with the silent promotion.

“The meeting is herby dismissed.” Thorin told them firmly and guided both boys out.

“I’m very proud of both of you!” He told them the moment they arrived at his office. “You did a remarkable job.” He glanced at the boys, but their faces did not show happiness but relief. “I hope in the future you two will be able to cooperate together, as we already discussed two afternoons a week are mine. You will come to the office and do any set task.”

“Yes uncle.” Kili’s head was hung low.

“As you wish uncle.” Fili added calmly but without eagerness.

“The project you did really proved you both have artistic taste, the one good thing you could inherit from your father. I hope you will also prove you got some things from me as well.” Thorin continued. “Madrid needs more work, and you will take part in the last phase choosing the last details, but with my team.” He told them. “You may go home for today, have some rest you both deserve it.”

“Thank you uncle.” Kili replied timidly.

“Let’s go.” Fili urged him to leave. He signed deeply as they left the building.

“Could you drive me to Tauriel?” Kili asked him gently.

Fili just glanced at him and nodded. “What’s the address?” He finally asked. Kili told him and they drove in silence.

As they arrived Fili couldn’t take the silence anymore. “I don’t hate you.” He finally told his brother tenderly.

“We’ll never be able to be friends.” Kili noticed grimly sitting in the car.

“Let’s just not be enemies.” Fili noticed coldly trying to ease the huge pain he felt.

“I’ll never be your enemy.” His brother noticed sternly and got out of the car trying to hide his tears.

Fili’s heart fell seeing Kili cry as he ran to Tauriel’s home, but there was nothing he could do to ease his pain. There was no way they could continue on the path they started in Spain.

Kili felt like running, he rushed into Tauriel’s house, the last few days were the most painful in his life. He had no idea what Fili wanted, but it was evident he didn’t want him. He rejected him so deeply that Kili felt suffocating. Today’s words just added to the ashes in his mouth.

Tauriel wasn’t at all surprised to see him, but seeing his tears she simply guided him to his room. The moment she realised he loved painting she gave him a room in her house where he could paint out all his troubles. He silently grabbed his paints and without a word began pouring out all the pain. Seeing him so focused she didn’t have the heart to ask what happened, she knew already Fili rejected him.

“It’s funny how everyone praises Fili’s art, but the real talent is Kili.” Her father startled her. Thranduil liked taking a look into the art room where Kili would spend most of his time in their house.

“One day he’s going to be famous.” Tauriel added confidently.

“I’ve been thinking. Elrond is going to visit us after Christmas, make sure the best ones are out.” Thranduil told her.

“You mean Elrond Rivendell from Rivendell Galleries?” Tauriel asked with a smirk. “I didn’t even know you know him.”

“It’s an old friend I recently came in touch with. I have to think of my future son in law.” Thranduil added with a smirk. “Especially since my son is officially gay.”

Tauriel glanced at him surprised. “You know about that?”

“Of course I do.” Thranduil noticed sternly. “Anyway since you’re stubborn we might as well assure that your boyfriend goes somewhere.”

“You’re the best!” Tauriel kissed his cheek.

“Don’t tell him, if Elrond doesn’t like his art no harm will be done to his pride.” Thranduil noticed.

“I know dad. Thank you.” Tauriel assured him.

They both glanced at the red portrait slowly emerging from under Kili’s swift moves. It was Fili, but the image was so dark and so gloomy Tauriel felt shivers come down her back. That kind of mood was just what pushed her to slash her writs just two years earlier, and she would do everything to keep Kili safe.


	12. Chapter 12

Fili came home and headed straight to his studio. He had only one thing on his mind, and his visions were red as blood and painful as hell. He had to paint his pain out, and the canvas were a patient listener.

Tauriel drove Kili back home after dinner. He was sad and depressed but after painting nonstop for many hours he was less agitated. He walked into his room feeling uneasy. There was one thing bothering him, and he couldn’t just take it. He walked to Fili’s studio surprised to see him still there. Fili was all covered in red paint, the painting in front of him stunning. It was a vision on Spain in different shades of red. And as Kili painted all day in red, his brother was also obsessed with red. He stood there watching him in silence and slowly he came closer.

“So you do have some talent in you.” Kili noticed glancing at the painting. Fili nearly jumped out of his skin shocked with the voice next to him.

“What are you doing here?” Fili asked sternly.

“I wanted to talk with you.” Kili slowly told him.

“About?” Fili asked.

“I want to see your photos from Spain.” Kili slowly told him.

“The camera is over there.” Fili pointed towards the table.

“You should go to sleep, it’s late.” Kili told him tenderly.

“I won’t be able to sleep.” Fili noticed.

“You have to sleep.” Kili told him worried.

Fili glanced at him with tears in his eyes. Somehow the tender worried deep voice reached deep into his soul, and the tears began pouring. Kili pulled him into his arms and wrapped his arms tightly around him. Fili let him, leaning on his brother’s shoulders he gave into the warm soothing touch. They cried holding each other tightly, but the embrace gave them more comfort and strength than anything else.

“Come with me.” Kili gently pulled him upstairs to Fili’s room. He led him towards the sofa and forced him to sit down not easing the tight embrace not even for a second.

“I’m here for you.” He gently told him, “No matter what happens I will always be there.”

“I’m sorry but this is just so difficult.” Fili gasped still sobbing.

“It’s difficult for me as well.” Kili admitted. “We should talk more.” He added.

“Talking to you is so fucking difficult...” Fili noticed sternly. “I have no idea how to talk to you, I have no idea what I feel around you. It’s like my whole life is upside down when you’re next to me.”

“And my life is only right when you’re next to me.” Kili added slowly. “I’ll come back in a minute.” He gently forced Fili to release the embrace. He ran down stairs, picked up the memory card form the camera and then took some snacks from the kitchen. Coming back up he took his laptop and rushed back to Fili’s room.

“What are you doing?” Fili asked surprised as Kili set the snacks on the coffee table, next to his laptop.

“I’m not leaving you alone.” Kili smirked and plugged the laptop into the TV, and inserted the memory card into the slot in the laptop. In a few swift moves he downloaded the photos onto the laptop. Later he grabbed a blanket and set the laptop to do a slide show on the TV.

“Since you feel mixed up now, let’s put things into perspective.” Kili grinned and got under the cover hugging Fili tightly. “Since you can’t sleep, we might as well remember the good times.” He glanced at the screen still holding Fili tightly.

They spent nearly an hour looking at the photos, Fili finally calmed down. Feeling Kili next to him was soothing, but the reason why he insisted on the distance between them was still there. But Kili was behaving, Kili was acting normally like a brother should. It was something in him that felt the need to hold him closer to kiss him and touch him. But the glance Kili sent his way when he felt Fili stare at him, clearly in his eyes Fili could see the same longing. Gently Kili leaned in and pressed a soft gentle kiss on his lips, and pulled back swiftly with a apologetic smile.

“You’re really really talented in photography.” Kili noticed stopping the slideshow with the remote control.

Fili glanced at one of the views of Basque region. “It was beautiful there. It’s easy to take good photos when the scenery is that beautiful.”

“No, it’s not the scenery, not the weather, not the place. It’s you.” Kili spoke in a low hushed tone. “You’re old paintings were good, but nothing all that extraordinary. Your new paintings are pretty good, but your photos are better than anything I’ve ever seen. I won’t advise going into professional painting, but photography is your element.”

“You really think so?” Fili gasped surprised with the praise.

“Yes I do.” Kili admitted with a smile. “If you want we can spend the holidays travelling together, and take as many photos as your heart desires.”

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea.” Fili noticed sternly.

“As brothers.” Kili stressed the last words. “Let me be next to you if only as brother.”

“I’m not sure that will work either.” Fili gasped tears appearing in his eyes again.

“You think too much.” Kili scolded him. “Go with the flow, I’m not going to cross the boundaries you set.”

“I’m hungry.” Fili realised. “I skipped dinner tonight.” He complained.

“Go and get some food, I’ll chose a film.” Kili suggested with a smile.

“Sounds great.” Fili noticed with a shy smile.

Fili came back fifteen minutes later with a plate with sandwiches and lots of snacks and drinks. Kili just smiled seeing the amount of food, but he quickly made room on the coffee table.

“So what are we watching?” Fili asked sitting down and handing Kili a plate.

“Another horror.” Kili replied and turned it on.

“Spanish?” Fili asked grimly.

“Nope. British.” Kili pointed to the title ‘28 days later’. “It’s a zombie movie.”

“Just fucking great.” Fili mumbled and made himself comfortable under the blanket.

“You love horror films, don’t you?” Fili asked seeing another brutal scene in the film.

“Don’t you feel more alive when you watch them?” Kili noticed.

“More like closer to death you mean?” Fili replied.

“It just puts things into perspective for me.” Kili noticed. “I keep wondering what I would do and how I would react.”

“It’s not like these things happen.” Fili noticed.

“Shit happens to people. Tauriel is the best example.” Kili noticed slowly.

“What do you mean?” Fili looked at him surprised.

“She’s not really Legolas’s sister, she’s his half sister. She was born as a result of an affair between Thranduil and his former secretary. She was raised by her mother, but then her mother died to cancer and she had to live with Thranduil.” Kili began explaining. “She came to live with them at the age of thirteen, and Legolas’s mother hates her.”

“How did Legolas feel when she came to live with them?” Fili noticed the similarity to their life.

“He said he hated her at the beginning, but now they are best friends.” Kili told him. “But first Tauriel went through depression and despair. She felt lost and rejected, and she tried to kill herself.”

“What?” Fili gasped surprised.

“She cut her wrists, that’s why she carries all those bracelets all the time.” Kili explained. “Later they moved here and Legolas did everything to fix their relations. Legolas keeps saying our friendship made her stabilize.”

“That’s why you spend so much time with her.” Fili noticed.

“She needs me, and I need her. She’s my only real friend.” Kili explained.

“So if I ask you to leave her for me, you won’t want to hurt her?” Fili asked in a strained tone.

“Will you ask me?” Kili asked with despair in his voice.

“No...” Fili’s head hung low.

“Let’s go to sleep.” Kili suggested.

“I won’t fall asleep, I’ve been suffering from insomnia lately.” Fili admitted.

“Not, if we sleep together.” Kili told him slowly. “Just sleep.”

“We can try for just one night.” Fili finally told him.

“I’ll always be there for you, on any terms you give me.” Kili gently reached his hand towards Fili.

“You know what?” Kili suddenly told him.

“What?” Fili asked curiously as they were lying down in his bed.

“When the final decorations will take place, we should hang your photos everywhere.” Kili told him firmly.

“I’d like that, but let uncle tell us his opinion first.” Fili spoke trying not to hope too much.

Kili gently embraced him and they lay together, closely but not in an erotic way. It was a bit difficult for both of them, but Kili would keep to his word, he would do everything Fili would ask from him.

 


	13. Chapter 13

“What are you doing?” A female aggressive voice awoke both of them.

Kili blinked and opened his eyes to look at their mother standing there at the feet of Fili’s bed. “Mom?” Fili’s voice was full of love and enthusiasm.

“Why are you two together here?” Dis’s voice was cold as ice.

“We watched films together till the dead of night.” Fili explained slowly taking on Dis’s attitude. He gently motioned Kili to get out taking on their mom’s bad humour on himself knowing how fragile Kili was when it came to their mother.

“Why are you here?” Dis looked at Kili firmly.

“I asked him to stay with me.” Fili suddenly spoke.

“You did?” Dis’s voice as ice cold. “Why would do that?” She asked firmly.

Fili just lowered his head.

“What’s all the commotion since early morning?” Thorin walked into the room. “You shouldn’t be in here.” Thorin scolded Dis. Kili shrunk thinking those words were directed to him.

“I’ve been gone for several weeks and the whole house went crazy!” Dis spoke loudly. “You go back to your room!” She yelled at Kili ignoring the tears in his eyes.

“Let me make you some tea to calm down. I’ll talk to the boys later.” Thorin spoke calmly.

“Why talk to Fili? It is obvious whose fault it is...” She continued talking as Thorin guided her out of the room.

“You should go to your room.” Fili told Kili slowly.

“We didn’t do anything wrong.” Kili sobbed.

“This time.” Fili added grimly. “Just go, we’ll talk later.”

“Will we?” Kili spoke with hope in his voice.

“We will.” Fili confirmed and pressed a tender kiss to Kili’s cheek. “Go.” He urged him.

\----

“So when did you arrive?” Thorin asked Dis surprised she was home so early. “You could have called, I would pick you up personally.”

“I know how busy you are so I didn’t want to bother you.” Dis told him. “I’ve become an independent woman.”

“I’m happy to hear that.” Thorin noticed. “Where is Bofur?” He glanced around the living room.

“He’s preparing rooms for our new guests.” Dis spoke in a light tone.

“Guests?’ Thorin’s eyebrows rose.

“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and I found the perfect solution for all your problems. While in Australia I found the perfect personal assistant for you. And since he had to move I decided it would be best that he comes lives here with us.” Dis chatted away forgetting about the Kili and Fili situation.

“Live here?” Thorin was speechless.

“He has a nephew, so it would be best.” Dis added quickly.

“We’d like to meet them.” Fili told them as he entered the kitchen and sat with his signature smile and cheerful manner. That always worked on his mother.

After sometime Kili joined them and silently sat down pretending not to be there.

Soon they heard Bofur calmly talk to someone about how the house looked nice.

“It’s a really stunning building.” The soft Australian accent spoke calmly.

“It’s beautiful uncle.” A soft childish voice added.

“Breakfast will be served shortly, you must be hungry.” Bofur added kindly.

“A bit, but for us it’s more like supper due to the time difference.” The calm voice replied again.

As the two people came closer, Dis stood up and guided the short blond man towards her brother who seemed stunned.

“Thorin this is Bilbo Baggins, and his nephew Frodo.” Dis introduced them.

“Bilbo meet my brother, this is my son Fili, and that is his brother Kili.” She spoke quickly at the last introduction.

“I hope you like it here.” Fili added with a smile, aiming at the shy child hiding behind his uncle.

“Hi.” The meek childish voice answered and finally they could see the cutest face framed with dark locks and highlighted with deep blue eyes.

“I thought you only had one son.” Bilbo noticed quickly looking at both boys.

“There is not much to talk about.” She added quickly not minding that she was hurting Kili.

“Mr. Baggins I would like to talk with you in my office after breakfast. Fili and Kili will take Frodo to his room for rest.” Thorin spoke in a tone of authority.

“With pleasure.” The small man replied calmly not phased with Thorin’s grim demeanour.

\----

“I don’t know what my sister told you but I don’t normally let her hire my staff.” Thorin noticed grimly looking at the man. “Especially those with infamous surnames.” He added.

For a brief moment he gazed at the extremely cute face, taking in the golden locks framing the cute face. And the slightly hurt expression in those cute blue eyes.

“Not everyone has the fortune of having a family they can rely on.” Bilbo noticed grimly thinking back to the story of his family.

“With my family it’s also pretty complicated, as you’ve noticed my sister is the mother of two boys, but in reality she has one son.” Thorin added in a solemn voice and pointed to a comfortable armchair. “Why did she hire you, and why do you think you can do this job?”

Bilbo just cringed thinking that in fact this was his real job interview, a job be was assured he already had. He had nothing to go back to in Australia, they had lost everything. Dis was very convincing when it came to dragging him here, just to leave him in the lion’s den.

“I have a degree in accounting, management and law.” Bilbo slowly noticed there was no surprise in the eyes, most people only settle on one degree but he wanted to be perfect at what he did. “At the age of twenty two I took the first job in my family company and at the age of twenty six I was the CEO.”

“So why would a person with your qualifications take a lower position?” Thorin noticed grimly.

“The company belonged in 30% to me, 30% to my cousin Primula, and 30% to my cousin Lotho, the last 10% belonged to my aunt Lobelia Sackville.” Bilbo began explaining. “Primula was never interested in working, she was an actress and she never wanted to take part in the company, so I managed her part along with mine.”

“Having the controlling 60%.” Thorin noticed quickly. “With that kind of advantage you should manage fine.”

“Lotho had a degree in financing and for the last five years he was the financing director of “The Bag End”.” Bilbo continued. “Last year he committed suicide.” Bilbo added in a desperate tone. “And when things cleared out it became evident the company was ruined, Lotho had defrauded most of the company funds and lost it gambling.”

“And you had no idea? Despite your degree in accountancy?” Thorin asked grimly.

“I trusted him.” Bilbo lowered his head. “And then Primula died in a sailing accident with her husband, so now it’s just me and Frodo, and aunt Lobelia hates me because she’s blaming me for Lotho’s death.”

“So that’s where the gossip comes from?” Thorin asked adding all the facts together.

“Because of all the gossip it was very difficult to find a job. Dis met me at the worst time of my life, working a job unsuited for me. She asked me about everything and she proposed this job to me.” Bilbo lowered his head, clearly he felt overwhelmed.

“Your family story is pretty dramatic.” Thorin noticed. “But what’s done is done. You will have to prove your worth, take any task without complaint.”

“I need this job.” Bilbo spoke clearly grasping the ray of hope. “And I will do anything.”

“Anything?” Thorin taunted with a wicked smile.

Bilbo slowly nodded clearly beaten.

“So by assistant you will work along me under my personal supervision. And you will do any task no matter how bizarre.” Thorin clarified. The small man slowly nodded.

“And if after a year if you prove trustworthy I will transfer you to a position matching your qualifications.” Thorin added slowly.

The smaller man’s eyes lit up. “That would be great.” He noticed.

“Good, so go and rest. Your works starts on Monday.” Thorin decided to be civil and give the man time to adjust with the time change.

“Thank you.” Bilbo smiled, he hated charity, but he would do anything to give Frodo a good life.

Fili and Kili took Frodo upstairs and the boy silently showed them which room he got. His bags were all around and the boy was clearly falling asleep.

"Go to bed, your uncle will talk to our uncle and everything is going to be fine." Kili gently told him and urged the boy to go to bed.

"I don't know where my pyjamas are..." The boy gasped and looked at them with weary eyes.

"We'll help you find them." Fili quickly added and began opening the bags.

"Is this fine?" Kili easily found a set of pyjamas with dinosaurs.

"I don't like those..." Frodo gasped and pouted like a typical little boy.

"Great! They're mine now! I love dinosaurs!" Kili noticed and began naming the dinosaurs on the clothes. The boy followed his finger pointing to the dinosaurs and he silently began repeating the names. As Kili later folded the pyjamas and wanted to put them away, he glanced at the boy who was watching him with hawk eyes.

"Did you change your mind?" Fili asked with a smile and the boy slowly nodded.

"Too bad, they would be too small for me anyway..." Kili handed the pyjamas with a grin.

"The bathroom is over there, we'll wait till you change." Fili guided the boy into the bathroom.

"But you won't leave me alone?" Frodo asked in a worried voice. Somehow the two teenagers made him feel comfortable.

"We'll wait till your uncle comes here." Kili assured him with a smile.

They didn't have to wait long. Soon the short blond man arrived and he just smiled seeing the boy asleep in his least favourite pyjamas.

"How did you manage to convince him to put them on?" Bilbo asked them in a hushed tone.

"A little persuasion." Kili grinned.

"We'll leave you both to rest, It was a pleasure to meet you." Fili told him slowly.

"Which one is older?" Bilbo asked glancing at the brothers.

"We're twins." Fili answered quickly pulling Kili out of the room.

"What a day..." Bilbo gasped taking a look at the sleeping boy.

 


	14. Chapter 14

"So what happens now?" Kili asked Fili coming back to reality.

"Nothing. Ignore mother, and we're not sleeping together again." Fili replied firmly.

"Even if you can't sleep?" Kili asked worried.

"It's my problem and you have to stay off mother's radar." Fili told him firmly. "For your own good." He added.

"So for my own good I'm suppose to stay away from you?" Kili asked grimly. "Everything comes back to the good old hatred times?"

"No quite." Fili noticed. "Nothing will ever be the same, but in front of mother it has to be the same."

"That's practically the same thing." Kili noticed sternly.

"We'll be going to uncle's office and school together." Fili told him. "When alone we can talk normally."

"Just fucking great..." Kili mumbled and walked to his room. "I'm going shopping with Tauriel soon."

"Would you mind if I come along?" Fili asked in a tense voice.

"Yes I do mind." Kili added in a bitter tone thinking about the destination of their shopping trip. As he walked out he couldn't help but notice the tears in Fili's eyes.

“Fine, I’m not as heartless as you.” He finally told him grimly. “I thought I could be as cold as you, but I can’t.” Kili gasped with despair. He reached out his hand.

“I’m really trying to be cold.” Fili noticed sternly.

“Trying does not really work for both of us, doesn’t it?” Kili gently hugged him.

“Why is everything so difficult?” Fili hugged him closely resting his head in Kili’s neck.

“Tauriel is going to be here soon, so you have like five minutes to get ready.” Kili nudged him to go to the bathroom. Holding his hand tightly he forced Fili to wash his face.

“Ready?” Kili asked as Fili changed his t-shirt and got ready to leave.

“Let’s go.” Fili replied slowly, not smiling but not crying anymore.

“Where are you going?” Dis asked surprised to see them walk to the front door together.

“Shopping.” Fili replied curtly.

“Together?” Her voice was cold as ice.

“Yes.” Fili replied shielding Kili from her.

“Ms. Durin?” Tauriel chose that moment to arrive.

“It’s great to see you darling!” Dis was clearly happy to see her, Tauriel immediately smiled widely. “So you’re going together with Tauriel? You should have said so earlier.” She smiled encouragingly. Kili just rolled his eyes thinking about the implication and clear suggestion she wanted Fili to spend more time with her.

“So how was your trip to Australia?” Tauriel asked politely with her best wide smile.

“Fantastic! I’ve seen many beautiful places and met so many nice people! Wait a moment darling I got something for you!” Dis rushed to her room.

She returned within several minutes with a beautiful box. “Here you are darling.” She handed Tauriel the box with a smile. “The best what Australia has to offer for my future daughter.” Her smile became even wider.

Tauriel hesitantly opened the box, and her fake smile became real when she saw what was in the box. “Real Australian Opals?” Tauriel gasped delighted as she pulled out a beautiful necklace.

“It’s called Australian Black Crystal.” Dis told her the name of the opal.

“They are magnificent!” Tauriel gasped and hugged Dis honestly. “It’s the best present ever!” Tauriel added with a smile.

“Have fun during your shopping trip!” Dis bid them goodbye as Tauriel grabbed Fili and Kili’s hand and dragged them both to the door.

“Goodbye Ms. Durin!” Tauriel smiled at the woman.

“I have to admit, your mother is fun to toy with!” Tauriel gasped as she guided both of them towards her car.

“She’s still our mother...” Fili noticed grimly.

“Well at least she has good taste in presents.” Tauriel grinned packing her new necklace. “So are you coming with us?”

“If you don’t mind...” Fili immediately sensed the uneasiness.

“Well, we were planning to go to...” Tauriel looked at Kili’s distressed face and stop midsentence. “Oh well since you’re coming with us, you’ll help me choose the best present for my father.” And she winked to Kili.

“I’ll gladly help.” Fili replied slowly feeling they were keeping something from him.

“Let’s go.” Tauriel smiled and started the car.

Fili later spent nearly two hours walking around the biggest shopping centre with them. It was fun up to the moment when they met Dain and his girlfriend Candice.

“Fili!” Dain yelled. “What are you doing here with the school losers?” He asked with a low snigger.

“Dain.” Fili said curtly in a tone Dain never heard for him before. “I would appreciate if you wouldn’t offend your own family.” He noticed grimly.

“Since when do you consider him your family?” Dain hissed clearly very surprised.

“Dain, no matter what you say he is my brother, and it is my duty to defend him.” Fili pulled Dain aside. “Stop the black talk, or I’ll start talking about what I know about your adventures and perils to Uncle Nain.”

“You wouldn’t...” Dain hissed irritated.

“Try me.” Fili replied. “You don’t have to like him, you don’t have to love him. Keep your opinions to yourself and your tongue in your mouth.” Fili added in a low threatening tone.

“So now he’s your brother and you’re going to defend him?” Dain asked surprised clearly in shock.

“Now I’m adult enough to see what you’ve been doing is attacking our family.” Fili noticed sternly. “Cut the crap and keep your distance.”

“Fine.” Dain slowly told him with a forced smile. “You’re slowly becoming the new head of the family and since you state your laws so firmly, as your cousin I will respect your wishes.”

Fili looked around but he didn’t see Kili anymore. Tauriel was waiting for him with a frown on her face. He just glanced at Dain and went to Tauriel. She immediately took his arm and made a grin at Dain.

“Where is Kili?” He asked surprised.

“He’ll be back here soon.” She told him telling the truth instead of lying or answering fully.

Fili glanced at her, and she knew he knew she didn’t tell the full truth. “One day he will tell you, when he finally learns to trust you.” She whispered.

“What if that never happens?” Fili asked in a low whisper bringing her closer.

“It will, but only if you let it happen.” Tauriel answered in a hushed tone. “He wishes for nothing else than to be next to you.”

“And being next to me is not a good idea.” Fili answered.

“You keep telling yourself that, and one day you might believe it. Unless your heart breaks into a million pieces before that day.” Tauriel made him realise.

“You have no idea how it feels..” Fili told her.

“Contrary my dear future brother in law, I’m probably one of the few people in the world who could truly understand.” Tauriel moved her fancy bracelets to show him the mark on her skin. “With every drop I felt closer to death and further from my reality. And then my reality crashed into my face and saved me.”

“What are you implying?” Fili asked in a tense voice.

“Stop rejecting what your heart says is right, because nothing else matters in the whole world.” Tauriel whispered to him as she finally saw Kili show up on the horizon. “At least then when the world goes to hell you won’t be alone.”

Fili glared at her coldly, and she shivered under the strong glare. “Ask him.” She whispered as Kili was making his way towards them.

“Legolas should arrive in less than twenty minutes, and then we’re going to the cinema.” Tauriel told them with a huge smile. “He said there’s a great horror movie playing!”

“Just fucking great...” Fili noticed with a pout.

“First we’re eating dinner!” Tauriel decided. “There is a great American restaurant around here, I feel like real hamburgers!”

“I love hamburgers!” Kili added with a shy smile directed to Fili.

“So do I.” His brother finally admitted.

She firmly grabbed Kili’s hand and pulled them towards the restaurant. Soon Legolas joined them and the four of them ate dinner and went to the cinema.

Fili felt thrilled when he felt Kili’s hand sneak into his in the middle of the film. He still hated horror films, but watching them with his brother who held his hand and comforted him at the same time was not that bad. Their entwined fingers giving him safety and pleasure at the same time. He kept glancing at Kili, and he couldn’t stop but think that his brother was beautiful.

“Take my car!” Legolas gave Fili his keys. “We’ll drop by for it tomorrow.”

“Will you trust me with your car?” Fili smirked.

“I trust you with my sister. And that should say it all.” Legolas grinned and grabbed Tauriel under her arm and led her towards her car.

“Let’s go.” Fili urged Kili to get in.

“I’m hungry.” Kili complained.

“Let’s swing by Pizza Hut and go somewhere nice to eat it.” Fili suggested.

“Sounds great!” Kili smiled happily. They got the pizza and Fili confidently drove back home, but instead of going into the house Fili guided Kili into the garden. Kili knew exactly where his brother was leading him, to what used to be his favourite spot. A hidden alcove deep into the garden.

“Bon appetite!” Fili opened the pizza box and began eating with his hands.

“Enjoy!” Kili smiled and grabbed a slice.

“I love the view here.” Fili gazed at the sky.

“Have you ever painted the sky?” Kili asked gently.

“I’ve been thinking about it.” Fili replied.

“We should paint something together someday.” Kili suddenly noticed.

“You’d correct what I screw up?” Fili smirked and taunted.

“Exactly!” Kili noticed with a grin.

“It’s funny now that we are talking, talking with you is as if we’re reading each other’s mind.” Fili suddenly noticed.

“And when we hate we hate equally. When we’re sad we’re sad equally, and when we’re angry we’re angry the same way.” Kili noticed.

“That means we should never fight ever again.” Fili noticed.

“Silence over fighting?” Kili noticed. “Because today is okay, but tomorrow you might decide not to talk to me ever again.”

“I might.” Fili noticed sadly. “This is all so fucked up... I can’t handle it.” He finally admitted.

“Neither can I.” Kili noticed. “The question is, are we not going to handle it together, or are we not going to handle it separately?”

“I have no idea.” Fili slowly replied.

“Neither do I.” Kili gasped for a deep breath.

“I feel like painting.” Fili noticed.

“It’s funny you say so, because so do I.” Kili laughed gently.

“I’ve never seen you paint.” Fili noticed suddenly.

“That’s one thing you don’t want to see...” Kili smiled evilly.

“Let’s go it’s getting cold.” Fili extended his hand and entwined their fingers again.

“You can come later to my room if you won’t be able to sleep.” Kili whispered to him gently. “You can always come.”

“I will remember that.” Fili leaned in and kissed him deeply.

Kili smiled radiantly at him. They threw away the pizza box and walked in the house innocently.

“Painting first.” Fili slowly went to his studio.

“Goodnight!” Kili told him loudly just in case someone was around and with a smirk he walked upstairs to his room.

As soon as he made it there he pulled out one of his sketchbooks and began drawing, but first he texted Tauriel “You’re the best!” and within seconds he got the reply “No, you’re the best! We both love you!”. She was truly his salvation.

He began drawing, a mixture of emotions gave him a wave of sadness, lust and happiness all at the same time, and the three gave him a drive to draw.

He missed the moment someone entered his room, at first he thought it was Fili, but as he glanced happily at the figure at the doorway he was startled to see Thorin stand there and watch him.

“Did you have a good day?” Thorin asked slowly seeing the radiant smile die the moment the boy noticed him, as if he was expecting someone else.

“Yes, it was okay.” Kili replied without emotion.

“Can I see what you’re drawing?” He asked firmly. But Kili immediately hugged the book tightly and shook his head.

“I thought you didn’t have a phone.” Thorin glanced at the phone laying on the bed.

“It belongs to Tauriel.” He explained.

“And she gave it to you so you could use it.” Thorin concluded. “What else has she been giving you and paying for you?”

Kili gazed up at him clearly startled with the conclusion. Then he lowered his head again.

“For everything.” Kili finally replied.

Thorin sat down and looked at him seriously. “What do you mean for everything?” He asked in a firm voice.

“Lunch at school.” Kili finally said.

“Your mother didn’t give you a credit card with money for that?” Thorin’s tone was grim, and the boy just shook his head.

“What else?” He demanded.

“Everything.” Kili just lowered his head even more.

“So you’re actually saying that despite being from one of the richest families in the world you had to rely on getting everything from your girlfriend?” The way Thorin spoke it made the boy shrink even more.

“Mother... she stopped giving me any money four years ago.” Kili finally told him. “It’s not like I ask Tauriel for anything, she just keeps buying things for me.”

“Why did your mother stop giving you money?” Thorin’s vice became cold as ice.

“It was before the trip to Florida.” Kili finally replied. “She said I got low grades so I will never get any more money from her, and she said I couldn’t go with everyone for the trip.”

“So your laptop, your clothes, your books for school, your lunches and everything else is all Tauriel?” Thorin finally realised what Dis did to the boy.

“She never hesitated. For her money isn’t important, and I really didn’t have a choice. When I would tell her not to buy anything she would just buy it and leave it here.” He tried to explain in a desperate tone.

“I’m not mad at you.” Thorin made him realise. “I’m really mad at your mother. You should have come and talked with me.”

“I thought everyone hates me.” Kili lowered his head. “And that failures like me don’t deserve anything.” Tears slowly formed in the corner of his eyes.

“You’re not a failure, no matter how many times your mother might say it.” Thorin assured him warmly. “May I see the sketchbook?” He asked gently, but the boy shook his head again.

“Hey, are you okay?” Fili entered the room and stopped dead in his tracks seeing Thorin there.

“Shouldn’t you be in bed?” Thorin asked glancing at Fili’s night shorts and t-shirt.

“I was just going, but I wanted to check on Kili.” Fili lied in a blink.

“Why would you do that?” Thorin continued the interrogation.

“He said he wanted to show me his drawings.”Fili quickly gave a plausible argument for visiting Kili’s bedroom so late.

“He did? That’s funny I’ve been asking to see that sketchbook since I got here, but he keeps refusing.” Thorin wittingly noticed. “Maybe once you get your hands on it, you’ll tell me what’s in it.”

Fili glanced at Kili and the wave of emotions he saw in his face made him realise he said the worst thing he could have said. Kili was on the verge of a break down and the way he was glaring at him with a silent pleading so desperate and distressed, made Fili realised that whatever was in the book was trouble for both of them.

He gently approached Kili turning his back to Thorin he mimed ‘trust me’, and took the book from him. In a swift move he said “Goodnight I’m really tired, I’ll tell you about it tomorrow if you don’t mind!” and he walked to his bedroom taking the book with him.

“Well let’s call it a night. Tomorrow we will come back to the topic.” Thorin told him and slowly he walked out.

Ten minutes later Fili returned with the book, Kili had been crying and his brother locked the door behind him and took him into his arms sheltering him from the dark. Kili quickly hid the book so that Fili could not see it.

“I didn’t look.” Fili told him slowly. “But I was really tempted. You should simply show me.” He finally told him.

“Maybe one day...” Kili was still very fragile.

“Can I stay?” Fili asked. “I doubt he will be checking on us tonight.” Kili just nodded and pulled him under the covers.

And Fili was wrong. Thorin did check on them in the middle of the night, first to find Kili’s room locked and then to find Fili’s room empty. His brows crossed as he was taking in the information, but he had no idea how to interpret it. He wanted them close, but he had a feeling this was not really what he wanted.

 


	15. Chapter 15

_Their first meeting was at the age of ten. Kili felt unusually anxious, with a deep heavy feeling in his gut. His uncle and mother were talking in hushed tones, and no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t hear what they were talking about. Then Thorin drove to town and his mother was baking frantically, which never meant anything good._

_“Mom is everything okay?” Kili asked gazing his deep brown eyes into her pale blue eyes._

_“Yes darling. Everything is actually more than fine.” She told him smiling. “Uncle is bringing back home a surprise.”_

_“What kind of surprise?” The ten year old asked suspiciously._

_“You’ll see soon enough.” Dis smiled and continued preparing the cake._

_Kili heard his uncle car pull into the driveway in front of the house._

_“Uncle!” He yelled happily running towards the front door._

_As he reached the door, his uncle opened it and Kili found himself looking into a pair of deep blue eyes exactly the same height as he was. He just stood there shocked without limit._

_“Fili, this is your brother Kili. Kili meet Fili.” Thorin gently introduced the boys._

_“Hi!” Kili smiled his best happy smile, but deep inside he suddenly felt unsure of himself._

_“Hi.” The blond boy replied staring at him._

_“Fili!” Dis ran from the kitchen. “Oh my God you look so much like Frerin!” She gently hugged the blond boy and caressed his blond hair._

_“Let’s show you to your new room.” Thorin gently guided the new boy upstairs. While Dis ran back towards the kitchen._

_Kili stood there staring at the stairs still puzzled with what happened with a sudden deep feeling of being lost._

Kili awoke to a dream he didn’t have for several years now. At the beginning that first day would come back to him, when sad the vision of standing at the bottom of the stairs would haunt him. Opening his eyes he had only one though, he had to paint that vision out.

He gently eased out of Fili’s grasped and pulled out his sketchbook. Drawing would have to do for now, but he desperately felt like painting. He got back into bed and got under the cover. Fili immediately wrapped his arms around him, but Kili remained seated and drew. Drawing his dreams and memories was his only way of dealing with the past and the bitter feelings.

“I’m really curious about your drawings.” Fili’s voice startled him.

“There is nothing special about them.” Kili replied in a dry throat.

“If there is nothing special you shouldn’t be anxious about showing it to me...” Fili noticed slowly.

“It’s a bad memory.” Kili told him. “This way it becomes less real and less painful.”

“I’d really like to see.” Fili insisted.

Kili looked at his beloved brother with a hurt expression and slowly he handed him the book. Fili’s brows crossed seeing the sketch.

It was the bottom of the stairs in their home from the perspective of the top of the stairs. The door was partly open and a thin hand was reaching into the house, but the door seemed to be on the verge of closing, cutting the hand. There was snow coming from the half open door and the picture seemed to be freezing cold.

He was fazed with the drawing, it was magnificent. The simple pencil lines carrying so much emotion and perfection at the same time.

“I remember that day.” He told Kili slowly. “May I?” He flipped to an empty page. Kili just nodded.

“This is how I remember that day.” Fili told him and began drawing using the same book and same pencil. Kili was following his every move as the double image was slowly appearing. He could see it was the same place, but the hand was different and the style was different. As the picture was slowly emerging, Kili could see the sun shine. The memory Fili drew was a contrast to his, it was bright and happy. The staircase was beautiful, and the entrance was warm and cosy. But what made Kili’s heart jump was him. Fili drew him on the doorstep with a wide happy smile. The little Kili so cute and so happy it made the picture seems surreally happy.

“I always kept glancing at you in wonder if I would see that smile again.” Fili slowly told him. “I wanted to see your smile again.” He told Kili looking into his eyes.

“You did?” Kili gazed at him deeply, blue eyes alluring brown ones.

“Yes...” Fili gently sealed their lips together, kissing him tenderly. Kili’s arms automatically went around his neck, the sketchbook discarded on the bed as their bodies collided with lust and tenderness at the same time. Their kiss evolved into a tender game of teasing, tongues twirling and hands roaming.

A sudden knock pulled them apart clearly startling both of them.

“Just relax.” Fili whispered. “And go open the door.”

Kili slowly took in a deep breath. He got up and walked to the door, as Fili swift moved to the armchair with the book and pencil. Fili slowly nodded to Kili as Kili reached for the door.

“Uncle, did you want something?” Kili asked calmly.

“Yes.” Thorin pushed into the room, taking in the sight of Fili in the armchair. “It seems I need to talk to both of you.”

“About?” Fili asked unfazed.

“About why you are here.” Thorin said slowly.

“I’m drawing.” Fili replied slowly.

“Why here and why so early in the morning?” Thorin asked again.

“I had problems sleeping.” Fili weighed his options and lied a bit.

“So bad that you didn’t even try sleeping in your own bed?” Thorin laid his cards on the table.

“There are many nights I don’t sleep at all, like tonight.” Fili admitted truthfully.

“And spending the night in Kili’s room, locked from the inside helps in what way?” Thorin sniggered.

Fili went silent and glared at their uncle.

“You wanted us to bond.” Kili gently told Thorin sitting on the bed.

Both boys glared at him strongly.

“There is a slight difference between bonding and sleeping together.” Thorin noticed grimly.

“Is there a law forbidding us to spend time together? Forbidding us to watch films all night and draw?” Fili regained his composure.

“So what film have you watched last night?” Thorin asked wittingly.

Both boys glared at him again in silence. Thorin gazed at Kili’s sketchbook in Fili’s hands.

“May I finally see it?” Thorin asked calmly, thinking about how to play this.

“It’s rather private.” Fili told him slowly.

“So private your only uncle can’t take a look?” Thorin noticed grimly.

“It’s painful.” Kili slowly told him.

“Why is that so?” Thorin asked with crossed brows.

“Kili draws bad dreams.” Fili slowly explained, knowing his assumption was most probably correct.

“I’d like to see it.” Thorin slowly told them. “I’d like you to tell me about the bad dreams and about the sleepless nights. I’d like you both to trust me enough to tell me about what’s bothering you.”

“Kili?” Fili asked gently.

“Show him the last page.” Kili lowered his head.

“This is what Kili drew.” Fili flipped the page and handed the sketchbook to Thorin.

“It’s so sad...” Thorin gasped and gently traced the intricate picture with his finger tips. “I remember that day, it was very emotional for all of us. It was the day Fili arrived to live with us.”

“That’s why I was drawing.” Fili slowly told him. “To show Kili how I remembered that day.”

Thorin flipped the page to see the second image. “It’s so different.” Thorin looked carefully at what Fili drew. “It’s like a mirror image but the opposite view. You two draw completely differently. I had no idea you drew Kili.” Thorin glanced at the brunette.

“It’s not like my drawing was ever welcome.” Kili noticed grimly. “So I just don’t go on rambling about it all day and putting it on every wall.”

“That was all mother.” Fili grimly replied.

“Was it?” Kili asked in a strained voice.

“Why didn’t you take art at school?” Thorin asked him slowly.

“Mom forbid me.” Kili lowered his head. Thorin gasped with annoyance.

“You don’t need to hide your drawings from the two of us.” Thorin told him confidently. “And you if you suffer from insomnia, there are meds that can help, we just need to see a doctor. Keeping your brother up all night is no solution.”

“I don’t really mind.” Kili noticed.

“Do whatever you prefer, but never lock the door.” Thorin told them grimly.

“Clear.” Fili quickly noticed. Kili quickly grabbed his book and pulled it to his chest, as Thorin got up to leave.

“Breakfast is in half an hour.” He told them before leaving.

As he finally closed the door Fili took in deep breath. “That was too fucking close.” He noticed. “What’s so bad inside that you were so scared?” Kili glanced at him and invited him onto the bed, by tapping it. Kili shivered but slowly flipped to the beginning and passed it to Fili.

Fili watched in horror the detailed images in the book. They had only one thing in common, all of them were sad. In each and every one, there was either sadness, death or horror. Most were twisted version of real events, probably twisted in dreams. Fili’s eyes filled with tears at the sheer amount of sadness pouring from the memories.

“I had no idea you felt so much pain.” He slowly told Kili.

“It’s been difficult.” Kili told him slowly.

“Especially since when I arrived...” Fili noticed.

“Especially.” Kili confirmed.

“My life changed when I came here.” Fili told him slowly decided he could trust him. “I know exactly how you feel, my life before was as bad...” He told him slowly. “That’s why I can’t sleep...”

“Have you tried drawing it out?” Kili gently asked.

“So many people poke and prod at my drawings that I was too scared someone would find it.” Fili confessed.

“Let’s try it together.” Kili told him slowly.

“Let’s go to breakfast before uncle come here again.” Fili noticed looking at the time. “I need to get some clothes on.”

“I’ll see you downstairs.” Kili gently smiled at him. Fili impulsively kissed his lips with a smile and he left with a happy grin. Kili couldn’t help but smile as well.

Fili felt a new wave of emotions flow over him, just glancing at Kili’s drawings he could feel his brother had lots of talent. And he was dead set on getting Kili to paint. He was very curious what would happen if someone of Kili’s skill began painting.

He still felt torn, the raw emotions in him were boiling. He was limited by what he thought was right, by the rules he was conscious of. He knew anything between him and Kili was wrong, he knew the rules of society forbid them to be together. He knew if mother or Thorin ever found out, they would be separated just like in childhood. The time when they didn’t talk was much safer, that way he knew Kili would always be there. If his secret ever came out he knew there was a chance he would lose Kili. Now knowing his brother shared the same feelings made him feel even more vulnerable. Losing Kili now would ruin his life, he was Fili’s everything.

“I’m glad you finally decided to join us!” Dis told Fili when he came down. She was roaming the kitchen with Bilbo. Frodo was sitting on the stool and cutting some vegetables.

“We’re having omelettes, what kind would you like?” Bilbo asked.

“French.” Fili quickly made the call. “With jam.”

“Coming right up!” Bilbo smiled warmly. “Will your brother come down soon?”

“Yes, he should be here soon.” Fili noticed, but his mother sent him a stern glare. “So how are you feeling before your first day at work with uncle?” Fili asked Bilbo gently.

“I’m a bit anxious, but hopeful at the same time.” Bilbo smiled.

“You’ll do just fine!” Dis smiled warmly, and Fili glanced at her curiously, she was unusually warm towards Bilbo and Frodo.

“I’ll see you at the office in the afternoon, uncle wants me to learn how to work, so I’ll be spending two afternoons a week there.” Fili smiled.

“That’s a very good idea.” Bilbo smiled. “What have you been doing there so far?”

“We’ve done a huge interior design project for the new hotel in Madrid.” Fili told him.

“You did what?” Dis gasped clearly very surprised. “Why haven’t I seen it yet?” She was clearly very enthusiastic.

“I’ll show you the project after dinner.” Fili assured her.

“Hey! What kind of omlette would you like?” Bilbo asked Kili with a smile. Dis just glare at him.

“Cheese please.” Kili replied meekly feeling his mother glare at him.

“So tell me more about this project. I knew you had it in you to do great things!” Dis smiled at her favourite son, not noticing the other being saddened by her words.

“Uncle wanted us to choose one of the projects for the hotel, but all three prepared by the design department were pretty standard and boring, so we did a new project from scratch and uncle decided that was the one which will be used.” Fili spoke using the plural form, but Dis acted as if she heard only about him taking part in it.

“So you drew a new project?” Dis smiled. “I’m so proud of you.”

Bilbo glanced at Dis to Kili to Fili, the tension radiating from the dark haired boy was intense. Fili was trying to speak honestly, but it was as if she was only hearing what she wanted to hear.

“I think it’s amazing you managed to create a project like that, I’d love to see it as well.” Bilbo slowly told them, and when Dis heard that line she immediately started talking about how Fili was talented at drawing and painting, changing to her favourite topic.

As they were finishing Bilbo gently stopped Kili and asked him to help cleaning the table.

“Can we talk for a moment?” He asked the shy boy gently. The boy nodded as he put the last dishes into the dishwasher.

“I was wondering about your mother.” Bilbo gently told him. “She loves Fili.” He said curtly, he noticed the boy fold his hands nervously. He saw how anxious and furious the boy was at the same time. “She loved him too much.” Bilbo added.

“That’s why uncle sent her to Australia.” Kili slowly told him.

“I can understand why.” Bilbo gently smiled at him. “If you ever need to talk or any help, I’ll gladly listen.” Bilbo gently patted his back.

“So tell me about the project?” Bilbo gently urged him, and slowly the boy began opening up. Kili slowly explained why they rejected the professional projects and about how they got the ideas for their new version.

“Let’s go and see it.” Bilbo encouraged the boy calmly, happy the wave of emotion was over.

“This is just so beautiful!” Dis was fawning over the project in the studio. “I love the tiles, where did you get that idea? I can’t wait to see it in real life.”

Bilbo glanced at the intricate design. “It’s unlike anything I’ve ever seen.” He said with a smile.

“You should take a look at the VIP suites.” Fili pulled out more sheets and laid them on the table.

“Amazing!” Dis began analysing the design. “I love the subtle connection between the wood and green walls!” She complimented one of the many things Kili had insisted on.

“I love the wallpapers!” Bilbo added his bit taking a look at the second suite. “You should consider doing this professionally.” He added.

“Only with loyalty to the company!” Dis smiled.

“Of course!” Fili smiled easily and glanced at Kili, who was listening to the exchange with wide eyes. He clearly had no idea how people would react to the design.

“They will get a new project soon. Although not this grand.” Thorin’s voice startled everyone.

“What kind of project?” Dis asked curiously.

“I’ve just made a decision about our Cannes house.” Thorin told them. “Since we’re not using it, I want to change it into a luxurious guest house.”

“My Cannes house?” Dis smile faded.

“It’s not yours, it belongs to the company.” Thorin made her realise. “And it’s not used and wastes money.”

Dis hung her head. “What if I started visiting it more often?” She suggested.

“We need to cut costs and find profit.” Thorin bluntly noticed. “You’re using that house more would generate cost and not cut it. Of course we can make a deal if you cut your shopping expenses.” He added slowly.

“Less shopping?” Dis opened her mouth like a fish clearly in shock. “Is the situation that bad?” She gasped.

“Not yet, but we’re heading in that direction.” Thorin added grimly.

“So the Cannes house?” Dis gasped with defeat.

“For a start.” Thorin noticed.

“What next?” She seemed panicking.

“Erebor Castle.” Thorin noticed.

“But that’s our home!” Dis yelled.

“Our home is here, the castle is practically empty all the time.” Thorin noticed. “And there are many people willing to pay a fortune to rent a real castle.”

“But all our family antiques! The family gallery!” Dis was clearly startled.

“I was thinking of redecorating here and bringing the most valuable objects.” Thorin noticed. “But that’s as the last step. First Cannes.”

“Cannes!” Fili smiled. “I love that house! I have like a million of ideas how to do it!” Kili just nodded, he had no memories of the place being always left behind.

“But if you want to turn it into a guest house you would have to find the right staff...” Bilbo noticed.

“I have it all worked out, we’ll talk about details in the office.” Thorin cut that discussion.

“Where is Bombur by the way?” Dis finally realised she hadn’t seen the chef in the house since she got back.

“He’s on holiday at the moment.” Thorin informed her. “But he’s not coming back here. I decided we could use him better in another venture.”

“What kind of venture?” Fili asked curiously.

“I’m opening a restaurant.” Thorin smiled. “Anyway since we have a new assistant who likes cooking.” He glanced at Bilbo. “And two people who can cook, why have a chef here all the time?”

Dis looked as if lightening had struck her. “But we always had a chef here...” She seemed shocked.

“We’re cutting back on that as well.” Thorin noticed dully. “Bombur is a phenomenal chef, but he also needed a change in his life. Bofur is going along with him to work as a manager.”

“So you’re expecting us to clean and do everything around the house?” Dis was very worried.

“Of course not! Mrs. Bringsbee is taking over as the house keeper, she’ll handle shopping, oversee the cleaning staff and gardening staff.” Thorin informed them.

“So for Bofur it is like a promotion?” Fili asked with a smile.

“He’s got a degree in management...” Thorin noticed dully. “Keeping him here is a waste.”

“Very wise.” Bilbo shyly noticed.

“I’m cooking lunch!” Thorin made the call. “So I expect everyone to eat at home today!”

“You’re cutting back on the restaurants as well?” Dis sniggered.

“No, I’m putting family in the first place.” Thorin told them firmly.

“But I was going to go with Tauriel...” Kili whispered to Thorin as everyone was going about their business.

“Invite her over.” Thorin insisted.

“I’d like that.” Kili smiled and rushed to his room.

Bilbo glanced at the tall man with wonder. Around the boys he saw a different side to him. Reading about him, knowing the business world and the opinion this man had, he never realised that he could be so warm towards his family members.

“I never knew Erebor was having any financial difficulty.” He noticed glancing at the intricate designs again as the two of them were finally left alone.

“Keep that to yourself.” He heard a firm threatening undertone so famous in the business world.

“Of course.” Bilbo meekly added. “The design is phenomenal.” He added gazing at the renown businessman.

“The boys are very talented.” Thorin noticed showing a small smile.

“I was wondering about the imbalance...” Bilbo began slowly.

“I’m working on it.” Thorin cut the topic.

“Kili needs more encouragement.” Bilbo added unfazed with the firm glare he got.

“He does.” Thorin agreed. “Tomorrow you’re going to spend the afternoon with the boys.”

“What do you expect from me?” Bilbo asked.

“Next three weeks you’ll test their knowledge in accountancy.” Thorin told him. “They need the knowledge to run the financial side of the business. Find out which is better in that, but don’t tell them.”

“Fine, it’s actually easy.” Bilbo admitted.

“Don’t think that’s your only job.” Thorin added grimly.

“Of course!” Bilbo just smiled. “I was wondering about Frodo and how to organise everything...” He asked gently.

“Don’t worry about him, Fili will drive him to school and pick him up later. If he won’t be available I’ll get Dis to do it.” Thorin noticed. “She needs more things to do.”

Bilbo smiled. “That would be great!” He noticed.

“He’s a nice kid.” Thorin added. “And she needs less time thinking about Fili and everything connected with him.”

“Do you need some help with lunch?” Bilbo gently proposed.

“Cooking is not officially in your duties, so as long as you feel like it...” Thorin stated.

“I love cooking.” Bilbo added.

“Fine...” Thorin headed towards the kitchen followed closely by his new assistant.

 


	16. Chapter 16

Bilbo was shocked with his first real task. Thorin asked him to arrange Elrond Rivendell to come over to check out Fili’s works, as a way to put Dis into her place. Thorin assured Bilbo he knew the boy wasn’t at professional level as a painter, but the idea was to make Dis realise it. So after a very nice lunch Bilbo locked himself in his room with his laptop and did the research needed to approach Mr. Rivendell. He was also very surprised meeting Kili’s girlfriend Tauriel. The girl dressed unorthodoxly but her strange role of being an intermediary between the boy and his mother was invaluable. She was an unusual young woman and Bilbo could feel she understood the poor boy better than anyone else.

His first day at the office was difficult. Thorin pushed the most difficult tasks at him, clearly testing his abilities. But Bilbo felt the man was very suspicious of him, and there was a lot of contempt in him. He was a complicated person and Bilbo was dead set on proving his worth and keeping this job. He had to do this for his own and Frodo’s sake. They had nothing to go back to, their home auctioned and their heritage in ruin.

\----

Fili was surprised Kili did not jump at the idea of painting, he tried to persuade him to use his studio but his brother was stubborn as a donkey. But what really put him off was Tauriel. His relations with Kili were developing in a strange way, on one hand he needed him, he lusted after him, but on the other he couldn’t just stomach his beloved brother had a girlfriend. Even as nice and as fun as Tauriel. They spent some time in Kili’s room before she returned home before dinner. There was no way he would risk everything, just to be with someone who officially wanted to be with someone else.

But what really put him off was a phone call he got from Dain. Dain had insisted he show up for some kind of party, he was promising lots of alcohol and girls and their football team. But when Fili asked Kili to come with him, he heard a firm no. Kili didn’t feel like any parties, and more so, any parties with Dain, Gimli and Fili’s team. Fili was very disappointed, so much he finally decided to simply go alone.

Kili watched him leave from his bedroom window, he felt like confining in him, but on the other hand he didn’t know if he could really trust Fili. He was perfect and fun, he was thrilling and attractive, but he was unreadable. He wanted him, he wanted to be with him. But Fili set one demand Kili could never agree to, leaving Tauriel. He felt like explaining why, but there was no way to do that without explaining the role he played in hiding Tauriel’s secret relationship with her own brother. It was not his secret to tell.

With every passing day he felt lost, Fili almost stopped talking to him again, he would glare at him with lust, he would drive him to school. But it wasn’t open and warm as in that brief time they were together. As Christmas was slowly approaching Fili was spending less time at home again. And Kili desperately wanted to know why.

The day when Fili introduce Sigrid as his girlfriend to the family, Kili’s heart bled a sea of tears. He watched the kind shy girl politely chat with their mother. Dis was slightly surprised but the girl was nice enough for her withdraw any sniggering remarks. She wasn’t as open as she was to Tauriel, the red head clearly her favourite, but she was kinder than to Kili. Tauriel held Kili’s hand firmly as the girl politely tried talking to him, only to be meet with a wall of silence. Later she would always politely greet him, but she had no idea why her boyfriend’s brother treated her like air.

The real crash came when Elrond finally found the time to judge Fili’s art. Fili was prepared to hear the truth, that his art wasn’t top class. But Dis wasn’t. She nearly exploded as the kind man gently tried to tell her the paintings weren’t exhibition quality, and she ended walking out with a pout murmuring something about his blindness to her son’s perfection. Fili and Thorin excused on her behalf.

Fili felt torn like never before, the hurt he saw in Kili’s eyes as he spoke to Sigrid. Those glances full of tears and despair. Fili wanted him to realise how much it hurt him to see Kili with Tauriel. He wanted him to understand the same pain, but what he got was bitter pain. He liked Sigrid, she was shy and polite. She never tried anything, and she was happy enough to hold his hand. Other girls approached him in a sexual manner before, but she was reserved to Fili’s relief. He could pretend to be nice, he could hold her hand, but there was no way he could pretend true sexual interest. With every passing day it was more difficult to come up to him and just say what was in his heart. He knew he loved Kili more than anyone else ever, but he knew it was impossible to dream of being together.

The surprise came to him in the form of Legolas waiting for him in front of his classroom. Fili just raised his brows as the tall blond motioned him to come over.

“Hey, Do you need something?” He asked politely with Sigrid handing on his arm.

“Can we talk in private?” Legolas asked glaring at the girl.

“If you insist.” Fili motioned Legolas to follow him, they walked together to the car park and Fili opened his car.

“So what’s so private you want to talk about?” Fili demanded not looking at him.

“You’re hurting him.” Legolas told him suddenly.

“That’s none of your business.” Fili noticed dully.

“It is. Because he’s venting it all in our home. You should stop fighting it.” Legolas told him slowly.

“I’m not fighting anything.” Fili glanced out of the window.

“You are. You’re desperately trying to be blind.” Legolas sniggered. “You’re killing him.”

“He has Tauriel.” Fili noticed sternly.

“A friend will never make up for the love of your life.” Legolas noticed and got out of the car. “Ask him what’s between him and Tauriel.”

“That door is closed.” Fili noticed grimly.

“Only because you chose to close it.” Legolas added and left him.

Fili couldn’t just stomach what Legolas tried to insinuate. It sounded as if he knew, and that scared Fili shitless. His life was based on the presumption no one knew and no one will ever find out. He had to hide his relation with Kili, he had to bury his feelings deep, but now it seems someone knew. And there was only one possibility, Kili told him. The feeling of pain turned to raw rage. Fili could feel a shot of adrenaline, and a wave of anger flow over him. Kili couldn’t just keep his mouth shut...

Returning home he drove Sigrid back to her house. She asked like a million times what was wrong, but Fili could not force himself to utter a word. He rushed into his studio as soon as he came home with only one thing on his mind, red...

\----

“Red again?” Tauriel gasped seeing the painting Kili was working on. She noticed long ago his mood swings often resulted in red paintings. All those most significant were red. It could be scenery, bloody visions, but most often the red finally took shape with blue eyes staring back. Eyes she knew belonged to Fili. In most paintings he was unrecognisable, those visions full of demons and angels, those visions full of rivers of blood and gore. In powerful strokes Kili painted his heart out, and she knew best his heart was bleeding.

\----

“I have already seen Durin’s paintings and it wasn’t worth my time.” Elrond stubbornly told Thranduil.

“Where and when if I might ask?” Thranduil asked unfazed.

“I got an invite from Durin like two weeks ago.” Elrond finally told. “His sister is the most annoying woman in the world not seeing reality and wooing over her son.”

“That means you saw the paintings of the favourite son, not the talented one.” Thranduil smirked sipping on his wine.

“What do you mean?” Elrond looked at his surprised.

“Contrary to what you might hear from the Durins, especially from Dis, there are two who paint, and what I want to show you will grasp your interest.” Thranduil insisted.

“Fine, if you insist, I will spend a minute taking a look at another worthless Durin collection.” Elrond gasped irritated.

“Follow me.” Thranduil led him to the painting room.

“Why does he paint here?” Elrond asked surprised.

“His family does not respect his art.” Thranduil noticed dully and opened the door.

Both men stared at the red painting drying on the rack. Elrond swiftly walked up to it and glanced with amazement at the design.

“For once my dear friend I do have to admit. You were fucking correct...” Elrond sniggered taking a closer look at the paintings laid out front.

\-----

“Kili we need to get home now!” Tauriel pulled him towards her car.

“But I’m supposed to be at the office...” Kili tried protesting.

“This is fucking more important for once...” Tauriel insisted and pulled him into the car. “Text them or something.”

“What happened?” Kili asked her surprised.

“You’re going to have an exhibition at Rivendell Galleries.” Tauriel dropped the bomb on his head as she pulled into her driveway.

“What?” Kili gasped suddenly white from emotion.

“Move it!” She grabbed his hand and pulled him into the house and rushed towards his painting room.

“There you are!” Thranduil greeted both of them. “I was just telling my friend Elrond about you, he saw your paintings and began asking me lots of questions I cannot answer.” He smiled a wide bright smile and winked to Tauriel.

“So you’re the person who painted these?” The tall sever looking man glanced at the young boy with surprise. “The Durin the family does not acknowledge?” He asked with a kind smile. The boy just nodded anxiously. “I believe you’re going to be Durin the famous.” The man added with a meaningful smile.

“So are you interested in organising an exhibition?” Tauriel asked gently.

“I’m coming by tomorrow with my lawyer, and we’re signing a contract. I want to have exclusive rights to your exhibitions and auctions.” Elrond made his mind immediately. “And you’re not going to regret it.”

“Our lawyer will be here tomorrow.” Thranduil added.

“If you insist.” Elrond noticed. “Now dear boy, show me everything you’ve got...” Kili just nodded and with Tauriel’s help he pulled out all his works from the last three years.

“You jump from style to style, and make it anew like you own it.” Elrond noticed with a smirk. “What else have you tried?”

“I still got a few at home...” Kili shyly noticed. “And I’ve got some photography as well...”

“Bring it all over tomorrow.” Elrond decided. “I’m going to make you famous boy, so you better focus on painting from now on. I hope you have art in high school?”

“No...” The boy shyly lowered his head. “I’m specializing in IT.”

“Have you tried computer graphics?” Elrond asked, but the boy shook his head.

“He’s done industrial design as well. For Erebor inc.” Tauriel added.

“If it was under Erebor we can’t exhibit it, but I’d like to take a look anyway.” Elrond noticed with a kind smile.

“I told you you’re the best!” Tauriel hugged Kili and kissed his cheek.

“And I’m sorry I never believed you.” Kili noticed quietly.

“Thank you.” He told Thranduil and Elrond with a shy smile.

 


	17. Chapter 17

“Where is your brother?” Thorin asked sternly as Fili showed up alone.

“I have no idea.” Fili replied.

“You were suppose to talk to him.” Thorin noticed grimly but the boy just lowered his head.

“I’ll call Tauriel and you get to work. Bilbo needs help with those last calculations.” Thorin sent Fili to Bilbo’s office next door. His new assistant was slowly proving his efficiency, and slowly thanks to him Fili and Kili were grasping accountancy and official documents.

He hesitated a moment, he had Tauriel’s phone number, but after a moment he decided to call Thranduil instead.

“Do you happen to know where my nephew is?” He asked without any politeness.

“We’re having a little crisis over here and he came to help. Or should I say my daughter forced him to help. I hope you don’t mind?” Thranduil asked.

“I do actually.” Thorin spoke bitterly. “You have your own heir to slave, so when it’s Kili office time he should be in the office.”

“I’m surprised you still haven’t realised dear friend, there are things far more valuable than any office and far more important than practising accountancy. If you’d ask me the boy is genius with numbers already as he is.” Thranduil replied unfazed with the harsh tone.

“How would you know that?” Thorin was bitter.

“Contrary to you, I seem to know your nephew.” Thranduil noticed and hung up.

Thranduil glanced at his phone and then back to the overjoyed teens celebrating the event.

“You know what? Since you all managed to pass this semester, you can chose any academy you want, I will pay for your studies.” Thranduil spoke lightly. And noticing their shocked glares he added the magical line. “For all three of you.”

“You’re the best dad in the world!” Tauriel grabbed her father with tears in her eyes. Kili was still standing there with disbelief.

“But my family...” He gasped.

“They don’t give a shit about you.” Legolas spoke bitterly. “We’re your family now!” He grabbed the boy and pushed him towards Tauriel and Thranduil.

\-----

“Where have you been?” Thorin jumped Kili the moment he entered the house at a very late house.

The boy lowered his head and remained silent.

“I thought we had an understanding.” Thorin spoke slowly. “You’re testing my patience boy, and it’s slowly ending.” He spoke harshly and he noticed the boy shrink with every word.

“You will look at me when I talk to you!” Thorin told him brutally.

The boy slowly raised his head and glanced at his face. Thorin shivered seeing the rage and hate in those deep brown eyes. As if the boy was utterly unhappy, and as if anything Thorin told him didn’t really matter.

“You’re grounded till the end of next week, and then we’ll talk again.” Thorin made his decision and noticed the boy shrink even more. “Tell your girlfriend to pick up any things she has here, the phone included.” He noticed a gasp of pain appear in those illusive brown eyes.

“Anything else?” The boy whispered quietly.

“Go to your room.” Thorin told him curtly and watched him walk up the stairs quietly with a feeling he just made a mistake.

\----

“I’m grounded.” Kili told Tauriel on the phone.

“Don’t worry father will arrange it.” Tauriel assured him.

“He said you have to come over and take all your things.” Kili spoke in a low voice.

“Your phone?” She gasped.

“Included.” Kili murmured.

“Does he know about the laptop and things?” Tauriel asked slowly.

“Yes...” Kili inhaled.

“Can I show up tomorrow and pick it up?” Tauriel asked.

“Yes... but apart from that I have drive with Fili.” Kili noticed.

“I’ll think of something...” She began speaking.

“I have to end now, someone is knocking.” Kili whispered and hung up and hid the phone.

He walked up the door and opened it slowly. Fili was standing there with a sour face.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Fili asked and walked in closing the door behind him.

“What the fuck do you even care?” Kili gasped and stepped away from him.

“It was better for a while, but you couldn’t just keep in line?” Fili hissed in a low voice. “Was it that difficult to show up for two meetings with Bilbo a week? Or was it my company that put you off so badly?”

Kili didn’t answer, he just hung his head low unable to face his brother.

“Stop ignoring me!” Fili grabbed his arm and quickly realised his mistake. Not touching was a rule he followed diligently, any touch a risk. The feeling of electricity in his arm was like a bolt of lightning yet again.

“What are you doing with me?” He shivered in terror. “Can’t you just fucking disappear from my life! I wish you were never born!” Fili spoke in such a harsh and bitter tone that Kili finally looked up to face him.

“Since that is what you wish...” Kili gasped and showed him the door. “That is what you’ll get.”

“What is that suppose to mean?” Fili hissed with spite still standing in the same spot.

“I hate you, and you hate me.” Kili whispered in a low voice. “That’s all there is to it. It’s our choice what we do with our lives, and since you want me to disappear I promise to do just that.”

“Like hell you will...” Fili gasped and pulled him closer sealing their lips firmly.

He brutally pressed his brother against him with strength. Fury in his veins fuelled him to push Kili against the bed. His brother under him was responding with thrill. Kili was grinding against him, kissing back and touching. Not before long they were both naked, their clothes discarded on the floor, two naked bodies fighting for dominance. As Fili pressed his brother firmly into the bed, as he grabbed the lube his brother had in the bedside cabinet, he could think only of one thing. That this felt just right. The feel of the lithe body taking him in, the warmth of his brother engulfing him, was the best thing in his life. He held Kili down firmly and pressed harder against him, his brother didn’t seem to mind being on the bottom, he was moaning and gasping with delight at each strong move. His breathing became even more erratic and chaste, and as he pressed into him he felt his world explode.

He was startled when he heard his brother cry. His slim body shaken with sobs and shivering.

“Did I hurt you?” Fili asked suddenly unsure of himself.

“Get the fuck out, I never want to see you again.” Kili whispered in between sobs. Fili got up and grabbed his clothes, in a split second he was out the door.

Kili cried like never before in his life, the beautiful connection they had and the hate their shared was driving him insane. He needed to paint but he couldn’t, he needed to yell but his voice was lost. He felt lost in his own feelings, he wanted him and hated him more than anything in his whole existence. And not being able to be with him truly was killing him. He needed warmth and comfort. He could still feel the pressure of his body pressing him into the bed. No matter how much he loved the feeling of Fili’s seed filling him, he wanted to be clean. He felt dirty like never before. Since Fili wanted him out, that’s what he would do at the first chance.

\----

Next day Tauriel drove by after school and she helped Kili pack everything he thought as forbidden. She just gazed surprised as he pushed two paintings into the car, ones she had never seen before.

“We need to sit down.” She told him pulling out a folder.

“What’s that?” Kili got into the car next to her.

“Your contract.” She told him briefly. “Read and if you like it sign it, if not I’ll tell my dad’s lawyer to renegotiate.”

Kili focused on the document, he glanced at the terms and financial conditions. “It looks good.” He noticed. “And it means freedom.” Kili grabbed the pen and signed it quickly.

“You have just ten weeks till your birthday, do you think you’ll manage so long?” She asked carefully, she glanced at his shaking hands and grim face.

“I have to.” Kili gasped and got out. “Even if I get grounded till my birthday.”

“Kili!” She yelled at him. He leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. “Take this.” She gave him a wad of cash. “Be careful and if anything happens you know where to find me.”

Kili quickly hid the cash and watched her drive away. He had a strange feeling those last three months before his birthday were going to be hell.

 


	18. Chapter 18

Christmas passed with a numb feeling in Kili. Bilbo and Dis went very far at decorating the house. They bought a huge tree, and Frodo decorated it. Kili felt so alone and miserable, and the sight of Fili walking around as if nothing had happened hurt him even more. Both girlfriends dropped by before New Year’s Eve, but Thorin made it clear it was time for family and not for friends. Bilbo did his best to spend as much time as possible with Kili, he could feel the boy needed help, and Thorin made it clear he needed help with Kili.

The boy was a mystery to Bilbo, he acted as if he had suffered some kind of trauma, but the family story did not indicate it. He knew Dis was a horrible mother, but the problems of the boy were so deep and profound he was honestly worried.

Fili felt frustrated. His brother was the most annoying person in the world. He would sit there silently at the table, never answering uncle or mother. At school it was even worse, the teachers seemed to be hunting down Kili even more, asking him question and watching him suffer. His friends like Dain and Gimli began sniggering again, somehow Fili’s warning about back talking about family did not work at all. Then it was Sigrid. The most boring spineless girl in the world. She was so placid and timid, he honestly felt bored. His smile always on his face fooled everybody, but with every day it was more difficult to force himself to smile again and again. He often though back to the good days, when they were working on the project. To the nights in Spain, to the horror watching, to the joking and kissing. To the feeling of immense happiness.

He wanted him so badly, he wanted to be with him. To kiss him, to tell uncle and mother and everybody else that he loved him. With everyday the bitterness was rising and he felt a strange sense of panic in his heart.

He kept drawing him even more now, all his sketchbooks filled with Kili. All his thoughts focused on him. He wanted him badly. And the fear he noticed any time those deep eyes glanced at him, made his heart ache with unbearable pain.

He lasted one week before seeking him out again. He stood in the doorway as Kili still held the doorknob. He didn’t say a word, and neither did his brother. Fili made the call and he slowly walked in and closed the door firmly behind him. When the strong click of the closed door broke the silence Kili glanced at him deeply with fear in his eyes. It hurt Fili to see that glare, but on the other hand it irritated him beyond measure.

He didn’t even say a word, he just took a step closer, Kili looked startled by it, but he didn’t react. Fili grabbed his chin and forced him to look up, and the mixture of the same emotions he felt made him feel thrilled. He also saw hate and attraction at the same time. They couldn’t run from what was between them, he slowly realised as his lips pressed into Kili’s with zeal. He tugged on his clothes, he forced him to get rid of it all, and he pressed into him. As Fili urged him to turn around and later to slightly bend over, as he gently penetrated him, he finally could breathe. He held onto him tightly, his moves becoming more rapid and lustful. He wanted him so badly he could barely take it.

Kili just complied, he let Fili take whatever he wanted. His heart was bleeding with pain, but the warm feel of Fili’s body gave him a deep sense of belonging. It seemed so natural. His foul mood adding to the submissiveness. He found thrill in the way his perfect brother lost control when in him and around him. He thought it amazing that his perfect brother had one weakness, and it was sex with him. He kept wondering if he fucked that girl yet or not. And feeling him fuck him, made Kili realised he couldn’t take her around him, he couldn’t share Fili with anyone. He felt those strong finger grind harder into his hips, probably giving him bruises, but the rapid last movements assured him his brother loved what he had done, as his seed was filling him shamelessly. He felt a gentle caress of hair, and before he could even react he was left alone again.

\-----

Thorin was surprised with the phone call from Radagast the school counsellor he met several times to talk about Kili. But he cancelled a business meeting and went to the school.

“Mr. Durin, please come in and sit down.” Radagast was unusually serious.

“You called.” Durin stated simple.

“We need to talk.” Radagast began, he desperately tried not to show any emotion. “Kili has been showing unusually strong symptoms of stress recently. Has he been punished for something at home?”

“Yes. He got grounded like two weeks ago, he failed to show up for his lesson in accountancy without a plausible reason.” Thorin told him slowly.

“That’s it?” Radagast glanced at him. “His symptoms are far too serious for that.”

“Nothing else. He spends his afternoons at home, or with us in the office.” Thorin clarified.

“By us you mean?” Radagast asked curiously trying to continue the conversation off the touchy topic.

“Me, Fili and my assistant Bilbo.” Thorin clarified.

“Well, I do not want to push you into anything, but I think it’s time the punishment was over. Maybe lifting the curfew would ease his tension.” Radagast suggested.

“Why do I get the feeling you’re not telling me something?” Thorin suddenly realised.

“I’m simply very worried.” Radagast added. “He’s a very troubled boy, and his problems grew suddenly in the last few weeks.”

“Becoming an adult is never easy.” Thorin noticed. “Is that everything?”

“Yes, I believe so.” Radagast noticed. “Actually do you mind if I talk to Fili about his brother? It might help Kili.”

“You may.” Thorin gave his permission.

“Thank you.” Radagast smile for a change, one ray of hope he might solve the puzzle.

\-----

“So what do you want to talk about?” Fili asked with his standard fake smile. The counsellor seemed to buy it.

“I’m very worried about your brother.” Radagast spoke slowly.

“I doubt I can help you on that topic.” Fili noticed slowly. “We’re not really close.”

“That’s what worries me.” Radagast noticed. “Could you please explain why?”

“We have little in common?” Fili easily lied. “We have different friends, different interests and different preferences.”

“But why?” Radagast insisted.

“Probably because of our childhood.” Fili resulted into telling him well known facts.

“What do you mean?” The man insisted.

“I was raised in childhood by my father, and Kili by mother. I came to live with them at the age of ten.” Fili explained with a smile.

“Why did you came to live here?” Radagast asked slowly taking in the slight change in the boy’s eyes. This was clearly a very touchy subject.

“Dad wasn’t the best went it came to making a living and when it stopped being fun to play daddy he just packed me and called mother to pay for the plane ticket.” Fili gave him a short simplified version that was repeated so many times he could almost believe it himself.

“Was it really?” The man gently smiled. “Coming to live here must have been difficult, the climate different, the accent, and living with a bigger family.”

“Actually that was the easy part. Mom was great and very welcoming, uncle was great.” Fili slowly explained.

“What about Kili?” Radagast asked gently.

“Kili?” Fili’s voice hung a bit. “He didn’t like me much, but we just ignore each other.”

“Ignore?” Radagast gazed at the boy sensing a lot more than just an ‘ignore’ in the air. He gazed at the boy’s hands, now clenched in his lap, the slight shiver didn’t escape his keen eyes.

“He lives his life, and I live mine. We barely spend time together.” Fili added.

“But you do spent time together?” Radagast insisted wanting to see more emotion from this boy.

“Only when driving to school, sometimes we have classes together. We also spent two afternoons a week at the office with uncle.” Fili explained truthfully.

“That doesn’t sound like barely... Tell me do you talk during this time?” Radagast insisted.

“If you’re asking if me confines in me, than no.” Fili decided to play safe.

“No, I’m asking if you talk, like at all.” Radagast insisted.

“Sometimes, when we really have to.” Fili became tense, and Radagast noticed it immediately.

“Do you fight?” Radagast asked gently.

“Not really. It happened several times, but only verbally.” Fili stated.

“Do you hate him?” Radagast pinpointed the problem.

“No, I don’t hate him.” Fili stated curtly.

“You may go now.” Radagast told him feeling he had no more questions he could openly ask. He reached for his phone and texted Gandalf to show up as soon as possible.

“What did you find out?” His friend sat on the chair and observed him carefully.

“Honestly?” Radagast asked.

“Honestly and off the record.” Gandalf confirmed.

“He was molested as a child.” He suddenly decided to speak. “He was sent here and he adapted immediately. He’s an extremely good liar and he knows how to keep up appearances. His life is one big role, he plays to please his family, teachers and friends. He does only what is thought of as normal and acceptable. Everything he does starting from the clothes he chooses, to the topic of his essays finishing on every friend and conversation, is calculated.”

“You got that from one conversation?” Gandalf was surprised.

“No, I simply put the pieces of the puzzle together.” Radagast stated. “He manipulates everyone around him, with only one exception the person who did not subject to his charm – meaning his brother. Kili is his target, and he will do anything to be more important than him.”

“Would he go as far as to hurt Kili?” Gandalf was surprised.

“I’m not sure.” The counsellor stated. “It’s more than ordinary sibling rivalry. Fili arrived and took control for his own benefit, and Kili was pushed aside. No normal family would allow that, but somehow their mother is obsessed with Fili and she allowed it to happen.”

“And Thorin tried to prevent it when he took custody of the boy.” Gandalf realized.

“He tried to bring balance, that’s why he probably pushed the boys to spent time together.” Radagast realized. “Fili is the reason for everything, he’s the key.”

“Do you think he’s molesting or hurting Kili?” Gandalf added the elements together.

“It’s not impossible. A child molested or beaten in childhood, often grows up to be socially withdrawn and continues the circle of violence.” Radagast noticed. “But there is no reason why Kili would defend him and withhold his name. In his situation he would immediately seek justice and punish the perfect brother, discredit him.”

“Good that we’re speaking only theoretically and unofficially.” Gandalf suddenly told him. “This cannot leave this room.”

“What about the Durins?” Radagast asked suddenly. “I think Fili needs help, professional therapy.” Radagast added.

“Nothing for now. I’ll look into the matter personally.” Gandalf noticed impassively.

 


	19. Chapter 19

“Kili I need to talk to you.” Thorin called the boy into his office slowly taking in how pale and silent the boy had become in the last days.

“Yes uncle?” The boy’s voice was hesitant.

“Tomorrow you can invite Tauriel for dinner. Your punishment ends on Saturday morning.” Thorin tried to smile but it didn’t work somehow the state the boy was in made him really worried. “You can spend the weekend as you like.” He told him slowly and saw a light came back into the boy’s eyes.

“Thank you uncle.” The boy lowered his head politely.

“Kili?” He asked as the boy was about to leave.

“Remember you can always come and talk to me.” He reminded the boy, the boy didn’t even blink at that news.

A few minutes later Bilbo showed up.

“May we talk for a moment?” His very polite assistant was looking at him with a strange glare.

“What about?” Thorin glanced from his laptop.

“Kili. I’m very worried about him.” Bilbo told him. “He has problems focusing on even simple tasks, I think he doesn’t sleep well and he’s more gloomy than ever.”

“I know.” Thorin told him in a bored voice. “I’m dealing with it.” He cut the topic.

“Just one last remark, there is something strange going on between Fili and Kili, and I have a bizarre feeling I shouldn’t have left them alone.” Bilbo added in a hushed voice.

Thorin raised his head and glanced at his worried assistant. “Fili’s the nicest kid out there.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that...” Bilbo’s soft whispered barely reached his ears and his assistant was leaving the office.

Thorin gazed at Bilbo and followed him into the corridor. Bilbo was standing in front of the closed door and it seemed to be all silent on the other side. Thorin wanted to open the door but Bilbo with a silent glare grabbed his hand and motioned him to be silent. They both stood taking in the unusual unnatural silence on the other side of the door. Bilbo gently reached the handle and opened the door.

The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. Thorin immediately saw the boys weren’t working but glaring at each other with some kind of heaviness.

Kili seeing them lowered his head and Fili immediately took on his fake business smile. Thorin couldn’t see the difference, but Bilbo already knew the significance. With every day Bilbo saw Fili as more complicated than at the first glance.

“Have you finished your work?” Bilbo asked gently.

“Of course.” Fili passed him the file.

Kili just glared at the papers in front of him as if not seeing them at all.

“Kili?” Bilbo gently asked, and that calm tone and the warmth in Bilbo’s eyes pushed Kili to run out with tears in his eyes.

“Kili!” His uncle’s furious voice filled the corridor.

“I’ll talk to him.” Bilbo stopped Thorin from going out.

“Are you okay?” He asked the dark haired boy who was now sitting on the floor in the toilet.

“I’m sorry...” Kili sobbed, Bilbo gently hugged him and brushed his hair.

“Everything is going to be okay...” Bilbo gently assured the boy. “You can always come and talk with me, I’m here for you.”

“I’m such a failure...” The boy cried desperately. Bilbo motioned Thorin to step out before the boy noticed him.

“Those are just calculation exercises, you can do then.” Bilbo gently tried to ease the boy. “I’ll help you...” He assured the boy.

“I’m going to get punished again...” The boy sobbed in terror and held onto Bilbo.

“I’ll talk to Thorin.” Bilbo gently assured him. “Don’t worry...”

“I’ll stay with him till he calms down.” Bilbo assured Thorin and he pulled Kili towards one of the more comfortable meeting rooms after a longer while. He forced Kili to sit in an armchair and held him tightly.

“Fili?” Thorin noticed the other boy leaning against the wall with a worried face. He saw so much emotion in his eyes but Thorin had problems reading him.

“I’ll talk to him.” Fili made the call and approached the door. “Leave us.” He told Bilbo gently.

“I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.” Bilbo noticed grimly, but he immediately noticed the reaction in Kili. Kili’s hand reached out to Fili, and Fili took it without hesitation.

Bilbo glanced at Thorin with crossed brows and a worried face, Thorin seemed equally puzzled with the strange connection between the boys.

“Come Bilbo.” Thorin called Bilbo to follow him. They locked the door but stayed behind the glass wall and watched the teens.

Fili pulled Kili into a hug and sat on the floor in front of his brother. The brothers held each other tightly as if holding onto dear life itself.

“I’m sorry...” Fili whispered to Kili gently.

“There is no fixing what has been done.” Kili told him.

“Calm down.” Fili instructed him in a firm voice. “Calm down, I’m here. Don’t make this more public then it has to be.” He kept petting his brother’s head and trying to control the urge to kiss him and hold his the way he really wanted.

“I’ll come to you at night and we’ll talk... But now I beg you calm down for both our sakes.” Fili whispered so that no one could overhear.

Kili desperately held onto his only salvation and chocked down the sobs.

“I wish I could hear what they are talking about.” Bilbo whispered to Thorin looking at both boys. At Fili holding and calming Kili down.

“Me too.” Thorin murmured.

Finally after what seemed eternity Fili led Kili back to the office, holding his hand firmly.

“Are you alright?” Thorin asked Kili worried, the boy gently nodded.

“I think it would be best if we go home.” Fili noticed looking at their uncle seriously.

“Fine. Bilbo will go along with you.” Thorin immediately made the decision not to leave the boys alone, something was wrong and he had to find out what.

“I’ll just get my things.” Bilbo nodded and quickly gathered his things and followed both boys to Fili’s car, first sending a slight nod to Thorin.

Thorin just smiled seeing the smaller man look after Kili, he was trying to think realistically, but Bilbo as an assistant seemed to read his mind both in professional matters and family matters as well.

\----

Bilbo gently knocked on Kili’s door and slowly opened it.

“May I come in?” Bilbo asked the teen sitting on the bed.

Kili was wrapped in a blanket, his eyes and cheeks still red, but he wasn’t crying anymore.

Bilbo hesitantly sat on the bed. “I’d really like to know what really happened to you.” But the boy just shook his head.

“Who hurt you?” Bilbo asked with the warmest tone he could muster.

“No one hurt me.” Kili spoke in a firm voice.

“Would you please tell me who it was?” Bilbo asked hesitantly.

The boy just shook his head.

“Do you love him?” Bilbo asked suddenly, Kili glanced at him with wide eyes. Then he looked back down again.

“You do.” Bilbo summed up. “Are you ashamed to be in love with someone else? Are you afraid Tauriel will find out?” Bilbo questions rang in the air. “Or does she already know?”

“She does, doesn’t she?” Bilbo insisted.

“Yes she does.” Kili admitted.

“And she’s been helping you manage with it all.” Bilbo realized. “So this all is about dealing with your preferences? I can relate to that.” Bilbo noticed, and Kili glanced at him curiously.

“What do you mean?” Kili asked.

“It’s funny I never officially came out.” Bilbo admitted. “My mother was the only one who knew I was gay. You’re the second person in the world.”

“Did you ever fall in love?” Kili asked.

“Yes I did. And it didn’t end well.” Bilbo slowly told him. “He broke my heart, and later pretended that everything in between us was just a game. He’s married now and has two children.”

“How did you manage?” Kili gasped with despair in his voice.

“I cried a lot. Then I thought of killing myself, and then I decided to write it all out.” Bilbo told him. “My mother helped me, and then Frodo came to live with me and that made me realize I wasn’t alone anymore. I lost a lot of people in my life, but I know I have still a lot to live for.”

“Does it ever stop hurting?” Kili asked.

“It often comes back to my mind, but no it doesn’t hurt anymore. Not as much at least.” Bilbo told him with a smile.

“So did he reject you?” Bilbo gently asked.

Kili looked down ashamed.

“I see.” Bilbo gently hugged him. “I’m here for you.” Bilbo hugged him. “Go to sleep, we’ll talk in the morning.”

He left the boy in a better mood wrapped in the blanket.

“So what did you find out?” Thorin asked slowly.

“His heart is broken. He fell in love with someone else, and he has problems dealing with it.” Bilbo slowly told Thorin.

“Does Tauriel know?” Thorin’s brows crossed.

“Yes she does.” Bilbo confirmed. “The problem is it’s a boy.”

“Oh shit!” Thorin gasped.

“The main problem is the sexuality, he might be bisexual, but he might also be gay and rejecting it. Anyway his love rejected him, and he’s in huge pain.” Bilbo summed up.

“Now that makes things fucked up.” Thorin realized. “It’s never easy with this topic. And I thought Tauriel was perfect for him.”

“But she is.” Bilbo noticed. “No other girlfriend would accept him the way he is so openly and still be with him. She’s very special and she must love him a lot.”

“I’ll talk to him tomorrow.” Thorin told Bilbo slowly still amazed with the empathy and warmth of this man. “You’re special, I hope you know that.” He gazed at him warmly.

“Few people ever appreciated that, so it’s a pleasant change.” Bilbo smiled


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter for Hdburke and xNamikaze and especially Eldariel84. Have fun reading ;)

Fili waited patiently as Bilbo talked with Kili. He sat near his door and listened in for movement in the corridor, with a sketchbook in his hands.

He kept thinking about everything, about the strong emotions he had for Kili, about the sex, about the strong attraction. He knew deep down he didn’t really hate Kili. But keeping a distance was easier than dealing with what was truly going on. He knew he hurt Kili, he knew Kili deserved much more. What was between them was predominantly wrong, and although Fili had no moral remorse, he had to deal with what everyone else though as normal. His whole life was a game, a game in which balance was key. He strived to be the best he could be, the best student, the best nephew and the best son. Fucking his own brother would endanger that, he would lose everything, starting from the prime position their family name and fortune gave, to the favour of his mother and uncle. His heart kept telling him Kili was the only person for him, but in reality he knew it was too risky. And one thing was certain Fili never risked anything he valued. And after all those nightmares of his childhood he valued peace and stability most. Control. He had to control everything.

He heard Bilbo walk down the corridor and decided to take his chance. He promised to talk to Kili, everything going on with him was worrying, and he was dead terrified their secret would come out.

He glanced into the dark corridor and slowly he closed his door and gently opened Kili’s so that no one would hear.

Kili glared at him from the bed.

“Lock the door.” Kili whispered, and Fili just nodded and locked it and walked up to the bed. He sat right next to him. He glanced at his beloved brother wrapped in a blanket slightly trembling.

“I’m sorry Kili.” Fili noticed in a very low voice.

“You regret having sex with me?” Kili gasped in a low voice.

“I’m sorry, I just can’t control myself around you. I know this is so very wrong...” Fili lowered his head.

“It’s not wrong.” Kili interrupted him. “What’s between us is just what should be.”

“It’s immoral and wrong.” Fili noticed. “It’s even illegal.”

“Only if we get caught.” Kili dryly noticed.

“We have to salvage what we can now.” Fili told him. “First of all you have to calm down. And I’m serious calm down, no more acting up, no more zoning out at school. If you need help with lessons, sneak into my room in the late evening, I’ll help you, but for our sake you have to calm down.”

“It’s not that easy...” Kili began swinging back and forth. “I can’t take not being with you. It’s just too difficult. Spain was beautiful, and those days with you, working on the project... It made me happy. I want to go back to that.” Kili began crying.

“Kili, it was the best time of my life as well, but anything between us is considered incest. If it comes out we’ll both go to jail, we’ll be disinherited, discarded and rejected by everyone.” Fili dryly told him.

“And what others think is most important to you... you’re so vain...” Kili noticed.

“I’m not vain. I just know how the world functions. Mother loves me only because I don’t cause any problems. My friends spend time with me only if I pretend to be just like them. Everyone expects something, and by meeting the expectations I get respect.” Fili slowly told him.

“That’s bullshit.” Kili noticed. “By doing that you’re living your life for others, where is your happiness in all that?”

“Is being happy for a short time more important than your safety and welfare?” Fili asked back.

“I might as well die, as long as I get to spend at least a tiny part of my life with you.” Kili noticed with tears again in his eyes.

“Surprisingly I get what you mean.” Fili shivered. “But the risk is huge.”

“We can go away, go to university somewhere away. Rent a flat and just be together. Come back for holidays act like brothers and then go back to fucking each other every day.” Kili whispered in a sensual tone.

“That would be like a dream.” Fili noticed. “But there is no way I can risk my life for a few moments of happiness. Even if I’ll be unhappy for the rest of my life.”

“So you’d like to be with me but you chose not to.” Kili summed up dryly.

“More or less yes.” Fili confirmed.

“My life sucks.” Kili noticed.

“Mine too.” Fili noticed. “I feel like getting drunk and watching a horror film.”

“You hate horror films.” Kili noticed with a smirk.

“If we spend more time as brothers will you be able to cope with everything better?” Fili asked gently.

“No sex?” Kili gasped with dissatisfaction.

Fili inhaled deeply with disillusion. “We’ll try without.”

“You honestly think that’s possible?” Kili asked. “Especially if we get tipsy?”

“Kili... You’re asking a lot of me.” Fili noticed. “Take my offer or leave it.”

“Fili, will you be nice to me and gentle?” Kili asked hesitantly.

“I’ll try.” Fili promised.

“Will you spend more time with me?” Kili asked with hope in his voice.

“Yeah, I’ll help you with school stuff and I’ll just hang out with you.” Fili promised.

“As a brother?” Kili asked with doubt in his voice.

“That’s the only thing we can be for each other.” Fili added grimly.

“Then I don’t have a choice do I?” Kili shivered again.

“Calm down, that’s for starters.” Fili told him slowly. “And before you go haywire again come and talk with me. We’re in this together no matter how you look at it, and even though we cannot be what we both dream of, we can support each other.”

“I can’t take your girlfriend...” Kili clenched the covers in his hands.

“And I can’t take yours. Leave Tauriel and I’ll leave Sigrid.” Fili cut it short.

“I can’t leave Tauriel.” Kili gasped.

“So deal with Sigrid in my life. It’s not like I fuck her or anything.” Fili noticed. “Why are you with Tauriel anyway, it’s not like you love her...”

“It’s just a ploy for spending so much time with her...” Kili confessed.

“The questions is why...” Fili’s eyes narrowed, but before he could insist more there was a firm knock on the door. Kili looked at Fili startled.

Fili got up and walked to the door, there was no point hiding, if it was uncle his room would have been the first to be checked.

“I told you not to lock the door.” Thorin spoke in a very firm voice. He glanced at Kili wrapped in the blanket and then back to Fili calmly standing by the doorway.

“A reflex.” Fili noticed without any emotion in his voice.

Thorin glanced at him. “What are you doing here?”

“We were talking.” Kili replied from the bed.

“Were you really?” Thorin asked grimly. “Would you please let me speak to Kili. Alone.” He spat the order, Fili glanced at Kili’s shaking form, he felt Thorin wanted to separate them to get even more from Kili.

“Kili?” Fili wanted to make sure he was fine.

“Just go.” Thorin repeated. Kili slowly nodded to Fili and with a aching heart watched him leave.

“Tell me please what’s bothering you...” Thorin asked Kili gently, but the boy did not respond, he looked down and began shaking again.

“Kili! Stop hiding! You’re a smart, handsome young man. Soon you’ll graduate and you’ll be able to take up any profession of your choosing and live your life! Don’t throw it all away because of a broken heart.” Thorin tried to break the shell around Kili.

“Will I truly be able, or will you or mother decide for me?” Kili asked almost silently.

“I’ll pay for any college or university. There is only one request, I want you to work later in Erebor, any post you feel like.” Thorin set the conditions.

“What if I don’t want that?” Kili asked.

“I’ll still pay for your studies.” Thorin admitted.

“Kili your mood swings and school problems really worry me.” Thorin tried to point out everything bothering him.

“Fili promised to help me with school.” Kili whispered.

“Did he really?” Thorin encouraged him to speak, and the boy nodded.

“Tauriel said she’ll help me as well.” Kili infirmed him.

“I was thinking, maybe you need some time away from all this?” Thorin gently suggested. The boy glanced at him with hope in his eyes. “I was thinking the two of us could go away for a bit, I’d like to see the Cannes house before we renovate it.”

“The two of us?” Kili gasped a bit disappointed.

“Would you like someone to come with us?” Thorin gently asked.

“I’d like Fili to come along. We were to do the design together.” Kili noticed.

“Would you really like that?” Thorin asked cautiously. His main goal was to spend time with the boy alone and keep Fili away for a bit.

Kili glanced at him with strong eyes. “I thought you expected that.” Kili assured him.

“I’d like to go just the two of us.” Thorin felt the need to insist. “We can take photos and you can work with Fili later back here.”

The boy glanced at his hands and stopped looking at Thorin. “If that is what you wish.” He finally mumbled.

“We’re leaving tomorrow afternoon.” Thorin told him gently. “You’re not going to school tomorrow.”

“Sounds great.” Kili hesitantly admitted.

\-----

Thorin stopped in front of Fili’s door, but when he knocked there was no answer. He glanced into the empty dark room, without a trace of Fili.

He walked down slowly and saw the light on in the studio. He opened the door to find Fili in an old t-shirt painting. The boy was so focused he didn’t hear the door open. Thorin glanced at the red painting, it was a view of a forest. The forest was menacing and tall, and the ground was covered in blood. Thorin stood there entranced, the painting was so much more than what Fili typically drew. There was so much emotion, fear and depth in the painting. Fili never pained like that, the paintings Dis praised so much were standard, typical course book classics. This was another story altogether.

Fili nearly jumped when he turned around to see Thorin stand there emotionlessly.

“You scared me uncle.” Fili noticed with a smile immediately on his face.

“Since when have you been painting like this?” Thorin asked surprised.

“It’s just a new idea.” Fili told him carefully weighing his words, not sure if that comment meant Thorin liked it or not.

“It’s different than anything else you’ve ever done.” Thorin came closer to the painting.

“It’s nothing really.” Fili tried to ease the situation. “Just an experiment.”

Thorin gazed at him, clearly seeing the boy was nervous about it all and about the questions.

“I want it.” Thorin suddenly made the call. “I’d really like to hang it in my office.” Thorin surprised the teen.

“It’s not finished yet.” Fili noticed.

“When you finish.” Thorin insisted.

“As you wish uncle.” Fili gently agreed.

“You should paint more like this.” Thorin gazed at the painting.

“What do you mean?” Fili wanted to make sure he heard correctly.

“From the heart.” Thorin noticed. “It’s like all those past paintings were fake and this is a real one. It’s like you finally began painting as you, not as somebody else.”

“So you like it?” Fili asked surprised.

“I love it.” Thorin confirmed, forgetting for a moment why he sought out the boy and why he wanted to talk to him. “You should always be yourself, and paint for yourself. Your mother might be a bit overbearing but it’s your life and you should live for yourself.”

“I’ll try uncle.” Fili confirmed. “Why are you here?”

“The question is why are you here. Are you having problems sleeping again?” Thorin asked cautiously.

“I’ve been worrying about Kili.” Fili changed the topic gently.

“I’m worrying about what’s going on between both of you.” Thorin bounced the ball back.

“If we had been raised together everything would have been different.” Fili noticed and gazed back at the painting.

“True.” Thorin noticed. “But we can’t change what happened, your parents couldn’t stay together, and we should have insisted on you staying with us.”

“You should have.” Fili noticed grimly making another stroke on the painting. “Everything would have been different.”

“Would you like to go to therapy?” Thorin asked gently.

“I don’t need any therapy.” Fili noticed. “Kili’s a bit unstable, but I think he’ll get better.”

“I’m leaving tomorrow with him.” Thorin told him gently. “I want to get him away from all the problems at school.”

“No.” Fili dully noticed. “You want to get him away from me.” He wittily noticed.

“Are you offended?” Thorin gazed at him.

“Not at all. Anything that will make him stabilize is for the better.” Fili noticed, he was bit worried with the news, but he knew Kili would keep them safe from Thorin no matter what.

“What have you done to him?” Thorin gazed at the boy trying to get the truth out of him.

“I haven’t been the brother I should be.” Fili noticed with remorse continuing to paint, giving Thorin as little information as possible.

“The question is are you planning to fix it?” Thorin noticed.

“Yes.” Fili confirmed.

“Go to bed.” Thorin told him and left the room with millions of thoughts in his head.

He walked up the stairs and towards his own bedroom, but he stopped seeing a light come from under Bilbo’s door. He gently knocked.

“What are you doing up so late?” Bilbo asked opening the door. He was wearing a robe and a pyjamas with a strange pattern.

“I’ve been thinking.” Thorin told him. “Are you having problems sleeping?”

“From time to time. Would you like to join me for a glass of wine?” Bilbo invited him in.

“I’d love that.” Thorin smiled and entered the room, he glanced at the wine bottle and the laptop. “I hope you weren’t working?” He asked gazing at the laptop.

“When I can’t sleep I usually sit down and write whatever is on my mind. It’s my way of dealing with troubles.” Bilbo told him and pulled out a clean glass from the cabinet. He poured Thorin a glass and sat on the armchair opposite him.

“So what’s been keeping you up?” Bilbo asked.

“Can I trust you?” Thorin gazed at the smaller man.

“I believe you can.” Bilbo noticed.

“I keep thinking about my nephews. I honestly think...” His voice hung before admitted the truth.

“They are both troubled?” Bilbo noticed.

“So it’s not only me...” Thorin sipped on the wine.

“I’ve been suspecting something was off from the first day I met them. They were so happy and cheerful then, and then they finished the project and kept their distance.” Bilbo explained. “I think Fili needs therapy as much as Kili.”

“Fili is the one who is setting the distance.” Bilbo noticed as Thorin gazed at him with an unsaid question.

“What can I do?” Thorin noticed grimly.

“The company, the family, school, everything connects them.” Bilbo noticed.

“What else can I do?” Thorin asked on the verge of a breakdown himself.

“Make it easier for them to understand what’s going on. Send them both to therapy. Maybe it should be family therapy including both of them and you. Don’t take it outside the family.” Bilbo noticed. “And send Dis somewhere far away, she makes it worse with her fawning over Fili.”

“Will you help me?” Thorin asked in a hollow voice.

“I’m your personal assistant, it’s my privilege to assist you in anything you might need.” Bilbo noticed with a gentle smile.

“You’re really special.” Thorin noticed pouring himself more wine. “I hope you will be a friend both to me and the boys.” He slowly told him.

“I think all of us should come with you on this trip, I mean me and Frodo and Fili.” Bilbo slowly told him. “We should not leave them alone at all.”

“And if I leave Fili here, he’ll be alone.” Thorin noticed.

“Exactly.” Bilbo made him realise. “And mine and Frodo’s presence will be a buffer for both of them.”

“Fine we’ll do it that way.” Thorin suddenly felt very tired. “This wine works great for my soul, I think it’s time for bed.” He slowly got up, trying to resist the urge to touch his assistant in search for comfort.

“Goodnight.” Bilbo told him lightly.

 


	21. Chapter 21

Fili felt the pressure more than ever. Thorin and his questions made him feel uneasy. As if Thorin knew. As if the truth was about to come to light and Fili would do anything to protect their lives. Somehow the perspective of Kili’s welfare was over clouding his own. He wanted Kili to be safe, he wanted their secret safe and hidden. Fili felt deeply worried, before nothing made him anxious about their situation, but today everything that happen shook him deeply. He felt he couldn’t handle it anymore. He felt that if someone came in he wouldn’t be able to put on his regular smile. As if his world had shaken and tumbled down. As if what happened to Kili finally hit him.

Kili could sense something was wrong. The moment he tried to go to sleep, he felt as if something was pulling him to his brother. He got up and glanced around his darkened room. He quickly walked up to check on Fili, but his brother’s room was empty. And there was only one place where Fili could be. He walked downstairs trying to be as quiet as possible. His heart nearly broke when he saw Fili on the floor sitting along the wall and sobbing. He was all red and for a short moment Kili had considered that his brother might have hurt himself. But seeing the new painting and the red paint everywhere, Kili quickly realised it was just paint.

“Are you okay?” Kili asked gently.

“Why are you here?” Fili growled.

“I had to come.” Kili gently sat next to him. “I could feel something was wrong.”

“Have you realised that our feelings are often synchronic?” Fili realised still shaking and crying.

“When I’m sad, you’re sad. When I’m angry you’re angry. Tonight I could feel you distressed...” Kili noticed.

“I could feel you the last weeks...” Fili noticed dully. “This mean we’re fucked...”

“It truly does.” Kili noticed grimly.

“We’re double fucked, I think uncle suspects something.” Fili gasped.

“Since he knows there is no point for you to cry here all alone.” Kili gently urged him to get up.

“How do you like it?” Fili pointed towards the painting.

“When you paint from the heart you’re fantastic.” Kili told him gently. “You should always paint like this.” Kili gently took his hand.

“We shouldn’t be...” Fili noticed.

“Just shut up for once.” Kili pulled him upstairs.

“We really shouldn’t...” Fili noticed as Kili pushed into his room and locked the door.

“Since he already knows...” Kili gently pressed a kiss. “We might as well do what we’re going to be sentenced of...”

“We already did...” Fili gasped with a smirk.

“One more time won’t make a difference for them, but it would mean the world for us.” Kili noticed.

“You’re crazy and fucked up...” Fili noticed in between kisses.

“And so are you!” Kili smiled for a change and kissed him deeply.

“Kili! This is so risky...” Fili gasped feeling his brother’s hands roam his body.

“Doesn’t it turn you on even more?” Kili nibbled on his neck.

Fili just inhaled deeply and pressed his brother against him to make him feel just how much it did turn him on.

“We should have just fucked each other from the start and keep it hidden...” Kili made him realise. “Now they’re on our backs... but nothing will ever change what’s between us.”

“You’re right...” Fili tugged on Kili’s clothes. “This does mean the world to me.”

Kili pulled him firmly towards the bed. “I don’t know how you could even imagine we could live without this...” He pressed another kiss as he gently pushed Fili onto the bed and sat in his lap.

“When you kiss me like that I know I couldn’t... live without you...” Fili voice broke down as Kili grinded against him.

“We can chose not to.” Kili noticed. “They are going to separate us if they find out.” He added as he was pulling Fili’s t-shirt off him.

“Kili...” Fili whispered as Kili got up only to pull down his shorts and return to his lap.

“I don’t want to live without you... not even for one second of my life.” Kili whispered to him pressing kisses down his collar bone and going down towards his stomach.

“You’re the only real thing in my life...” Fili gasped.

“So stop living a lie and live with me.” Kili told him gently taking his penis into his mouth.

“You know they won’t let us... especially now...” Fili’s breath was ragged and heavy.

“We could run away...” Kili looked up to look him into those beautiful blue orbs.

“Kili...” Was the only thing Fili said as his brother pushed him against the bed.

“I love you!” Kili told him kissing him with passion and grinding against him.

“I love you too...” Fili gasped feeling clearly what his brother had planned.

“You don’t mind do you?” Kili wanted to make sure the submissive role did not bother Fili.

“Close your eyes and tell me what your heart tells you...” Fili lifted on his elbows and kissed him.

“My heart says it doesn’t matter at all.” Kili smiled and pressed into his brother.

“Just be gentle, it’s not... what I’m used to...” Fili gasped and jerked a bit.

“I’ll always be gentle...” Kili kissed him deeply brushing against him.

Fili raised a bit to deepen the kiss, and urged his brother to continue to fuck him. He licked Kili’s neck and gasped with delight as his brother pressed deeper into him.

“You’re driving me crazy...” Kili noticed as he couldn’t hold back any longer.

“Don’t hold back...” Fili told him in a chaste voice holding him tightly.

“You can’t wait to get your turn...” Kili noticed with a grin.

“That’s the fun part...” Fili kissed him deeply.

“We’ve got all night...” Kili noticed as the sudden spur of thrill hit him and forced him to arch his back in one last move.

“More like three-four hours of what’s left of the night.” Fili gasped as he pushed Kili beneath him.

“Then you’d better hurry up...” Kili hissed with a grin.

\-----

“Kili wasn’t in his room when I was walking down.” Bilbo told Thorin as he was pouring him coffee. “I can guess where he is.”

“So can I.” Thorin added grimly.

“I’ll go with you.” Bilbo suddenly insisted and followed Thorin up the stairs.

Thorin gently knocked on Fili’s door only to find it locked.

“I’m coming.” They could hear Fili from inside.

“Good morning.” He greeted both men with his regular smile.

“Pack your things we’re going to Cannes in the afternoon.” Thorin informed him, while Bilbo approached Kili’s door and knocked.

To their surprise Kili glanced out of his own room, and calmly walked down to the kitchen.

“Breakfast is on the table...” Bilbo told him with a smile and walked with him.

“No school today?” Fili asked with surprise.

“No school, a few days of family time.” Thorin added.

“I’m happy you decided I could come.” Fili noticed shyly.

“Come down for breakfast soon.” Thorin told him dully still puzzled.

\-----

Fili glanced at Kili sitting just opposite him in the private jet. Kili was pretending just fine, he was gloomy and acted as if he was still depressed and sad. His head was down, his eyes slightly red from last night’s crying. He was listening to some music and gently swaying.

Fili pulled his sketchbook and began drawing.

Thorin was watching them like a hawk, clearly he was very worried and gloomy himself.

Bilbo on the other hand was chatting away with Frodo who was very enthusiastic to go on this trip. He glanced at Thorin with an all-knowing smile and turned to Fili.

“What are you drawing?” He was very curious.

“Just airplanes views.” Fili smiled and passed him the book.

“You’re talented.” Bilbo noticed with a smile. “I could never draw.” He admitted truthfully.

“I’ve always enjoyed it, and even if I won’t become the next Picasso, I still find it relaxing and fun.” Fili admitted with a light smile.

“Industrial design is also an option.” Thorin noticed.

“I’d really like that.” Fili smiled. “At least I’ll be useful to Erebor.”

“Think of what you really want to do, not of Erebor or anyone’s expectations.” Bilbo urged him. “Everyone has to find his own path in life.”

“I agree.” Thorin added. “Everyone should find happiness in life.”

“I really like your drawing! Can I keep it?” Frodo glanced at the book.

“Of course you can!” Fili smiled to the boy.

“We’ll put it in frames when we come back, and hang it in your room.” Bilbo told his nephews with a smile.

\-----

“You seem surprised with the house...” Thorin noticed.

“I haven’t seen it before.” Kili made him realise as Thorin guided him towards his bedroom. He immediately noticed he got a room as far away from Fili’s as possible.

“Unpack and we’re going to dinner. I’ve already booked a table.” Thorin told him and left him there.

 _‘Give them rooms in two opposite parts of the house. I’ll watch over Kili, and you watch over Fili.’_ Bilbo voice rang in Thorin head as he watched the boy close the door. He hoped they were doing it the right way.

Dis was dead set on coming along, but Thorin found her a new ‘ _job’_. Meaning he sent her with a special mission to spy on their rivals in America, giving her a similar task and a list of hotels. To his surprise her report from Australia proved attention-worthy. She tried protesting, but after he again reminded her of the good of the family business, she finally gave in.

Now he had to deal with the twins. And he had no idea how to solve it at all. He already tracked down the best therapist in London, who was known not only for efficiency, but discretion as well. Gandalf assured him Galadriel was the best expert around. Now he had to face them and thank Mahal he had Bilbo next to him. Thinking about the strong but caring man made Thorin realise just how much his life was empty before. His sister did one good thing in his life for a change.

“After dinner I’ll put Frodo to bed and we’ll talk with them.” Bilbo told him in a hushed voice as Thorin walked downstairs.

Frodo ran out enthusiastically and smiled seeing his uncle. “Can we go to the beach?” He asked with a wide smile.

“Tomorrow.” Thorin told him firmly.

“Tonight we’re going to rest and have a good dinner.” Bilbo gently hugged the boy.

“I’ll show you the beach tomorrow.” Fili grabbed Frodo and spun him in the air. Bilbo just smiled, both of the twins loved Frodo, and separately they spoilt him beyond reason. As if with Frodo they could forget everything that worried them.

“Will we go swimming?” Frodo asked with hope in his voice.

“Of course we won’t, it’s too cold!” Fili put the boy down and ruffled his hair. Frodo made a cute pout.

“So can we go to dinner now?” Frodo insisted. “I’m hungry.”

“As soon as Kili comes down.” Bilbo added with a smile.

“I’m so happy we came here!” Frodo ran towards the garden.

“I’ll watch over him.” Fili told both men and walked out after the boy.

“We need to be very careful.” Bilbo whispered to Thorin.

After a few minutes they heard Kili walk down.

“Fili, Frodo it’s time to go!” Bilbo yelled into the garden.

“I’m really hungry!” Frodo yelled enthusiastically and smiled warmly at his uncle.

“Let’s go!” Thorin tried to smile and grabbed the car keys.

They ate dinner and returned home after a walk around the old town.

“Can we go sailing?” Frodo asked the moment he saw the marina.

“Of course we will!” Fili assured him. “There is a nice rental company nearby, and I love taking a boat for a day.”

“That would be fantastic!” Frodo exclaimed.

“Bed time!” Bilbo gently guided the boy towards his room. “Can Kili read me a bed time story?” Frodo asked cautiously.

“Of course he can!” Thorin noticed with a smile, and nodded to Kili. Kili just smiled and ran up the stairs following Bilbo and Frodo.

“Sit down Fili.” Thorin guided him to a comfortable office with four armchairs.

“We need to talk.” Thorin noticed.

“About?” Fili glanced at him.

“About you and Kili, and what we’re going to do about it.” Thorin told him. “Bilbo and Kili will join us shortly.”

“What did you want to talk about?” Fili slowly told his uncle his brain working at top speed.

“Don’t insult my intelligence.” Thorin hissed. The boy glanced at him strongly, and Thorin had a sudden feeling of respect and recognition. Fili was going to be as strong as him.

“Come Kili...” Bilbo urged the boy to come into the room.

“Sit down.” Thorin pointed towards an armchair, and Kili obediently sat next to his brother. Bilbo took the seat next to Thorin.

“Cards on the table boys.” Bilbo began. “We already know so there is no point lying or pretending.”

“What are you talking about?” Fili spoke strongly and firmly, his resolved unmoved.

“The deeper you go into lies, the less reasonable I’m going to be.” Thorin spoke in a threatening tone.

“When did this start?” Bilbo asked gently, feeling sure he hit the jackpot.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Fili was not budging even a bit.

“You’re making this more difficult than it has to be.” Thorin grumbled.

“We want to help you deal with it. It’s not a matter of punishing any of you.” Bilbo gently assured him.

“With what can you help?” Kili asked in a shaking voice.

“We were thinking about therapy.” Bilbo gently told him. “We don’t want to involve anyone outside the family apart from the therapist. You two cannot continue hating each other all your lives!”

“So you want to fix our relations through therapy?” Fili noticed.

“Your childhood wasn’t exactly normal, and what was between you has troubled me greatly.” Thorin stopped pushing them.

“Therapy sounds fine.” Kili noticed slowly.

“If It helps Kili, I will take part.” Fili quickly agreed.

“Good.” Bilbo smiled. “So who wants to watch a film? I feel like making tones of popcorn!”

“A horror?” Kili asked with a shy smile.

“No way!” Fili complained.

“I was thinking of an old classic.” Thorin added.

“We’ll draw straws.” Bilbo summed up and rushed to the kitchen to get the popcorn.

“So I think we better chose a film before he comes back, and we’ll end up watching “Pride and Prejudice” or some other romantic crap.” Thorin told them in a hushed tone.

“Pandorum?” Kili asked with a smirk.

“I bet that’s another horror...” Fili gasped unhappy.

“A sci-fi horror...” Kili added with a grin.

“No.” Thorin spoke firmly. “We’re watching a classic ‘The hunt for Red October’.” Thorin decided quickly and selected the film.

“What the hell is that?” Kili asked.

“A very good film!” Bilbo smiled.

\-------

Kili awoke with a strange feeling in the middle of the night. Somehow he knew something was wrong, he got up and walked along the corridor. Even from his room he could hear the cries. He rushed to Fili’s room, and saw him deep in sleep tossing and turning. He was making strange cries, something between a muffled yell and a sob.

“Wake up Fili!” Kili shook him gently, but he wouldn’t wake up.

“Is everything okay?” Thorin’s voice startled him.

“It’s just a nightmare...” Kili shook Fili firmly, finally waking him up.

“Kili?” Fili voice so full of panic and pain surprised Thorin. But what Fili did next was even more surprising, he reached out to Kili and his in his brother’s arms.

“It’s okay, I’m here...” Kili told him in a faint whisper and began rubbing his back and petting his hair. “I’m here.”

Fili kept crying in Kili’s arms, as Kili was gently rocking him and trying to comfort him.

“So that’s why you can’t sleep?” Thorin asked gently sitting on the bed next to them.

“It’s nothing really.” Fili tried to hide his true feelings.

“Everyone has nightmares.” Kili added still holding his brother.

“Kili watch over him.” Thorin gently hugged both boys. “And if you need anything I’m next door.”

“I’m here...” Kili gently assured his beloved brother.

“Thank you...” Fili gasped and hid his face into Kili’s hair.

“I’ll always be there...” Kili held him tightly. “I think uncle just gave us his blessing for me to stay here...”

“I think he really did.” Fili suddenly chuckled. “Come here...” He made more space for Kili and invited him under the cover.

Kili tightly embraced Fili and together they finally fell asleep.

 


	22. Chapter 22

“So Fili is having nightmares?” Bilbo was very worried as him and Thorin were drinking their first morning coffees.

“It was really bad.” Thorin told him slowly. “But Kili managed to wake him up. I think that’s the reason why Fili has been suffering from insomnia.”

“If it was just insomnia it would be easy, but nightmares make the therapy even more needed.” Bilbo added grimly. “He probably avoids going to sleep, if we consider he might be having them frequently, it might prove to be a real problem.”

“I think that’s why they’ve been sleeping together, or at least trying to spend part of the night together.” Thorin added in a grim tone.

“Good morning!” Fili’s fake smile was back in place and he acted as if nothing had happened last night.

“Hello dear boy!” Bilbo smiled. “Would you like some toast?”

“Yes please.” Fili politely requested.

“Where is your brother?” Thorin asked gently.

“He should be down soon.” Fili did not elaborate.

“Could you please go and wake Frodo?” Bilbo asked politely.

“Of course!” Fili smiled and rushed back upstairs.

“He doesn’t seem to be affected at all.” Thorin was surprised.

“He’s a brilliant actor.” Bilbo added dryly.

The stay in Cannes did not bring any dramatic events, Thorin and Bilbo were relieved to see Kili smile for a change. The atmosphere between the boys clearly much better.

When they came home at the end of the weekend, the house was already empty.

“Your mom left yesterday morning.” Thorin told the surprised twins. “She’ll be in the US for some time.” He smirked.

“You should go to sleep, tomorrow is a normal school day.” Bilbo gently told them. “In the afternoon we’ll meet in the office.”

Kili just nodded and went to his bedroom a bit disappointed to sleep alone. He unpacked his things and went to sleep.

He suddenly awoke in the middle of the night feeling two warm hands glide over his body.

“I thought you wouldn’t come...” He gasped and shifted to take a look at his beloved brother.

“I’m addicted to you...” Fili gasped and kissed him deeply pulling him much closer. Kili just smiled and made a swift move to sit on his brother’s hips.

“Our last night before reality?” Kili asked with a smirk.

“Last night before reality.” Fili confirmed.

“Let’s make the most of it, shall we?” Kili grinded his hips against Fili’s body, and he watched his brother shiver with delight.

\-----

“So how was your trip?” Tauriel immediately began trailing after Kili at school.

“Fine.” Kili told her curtly.

“Will you be able to go to that meeting tomorrow?” Tauriel needed to make sure.

“Yes.” Kili nodded again biting down on his lunch.

“What’s gotten into you today?” Tauriel asked him surprised. “You’re a bit different.”

“I’m just...” Kili gasped and looked down.

“Are things better or worse?” Tauriel asked in a strained voice. She noticed Kili glance at someone, and she raised her head to see Fili walk by with his girlfriend. She noticed the brothers lock eyes together and a timid smirk appear on Fili’s face. Then it was gone, Kili lowered his head and Fili walked away.

“So that’s how it is.” She noticed startling Kili. “You’re not going to be able to pretend your whole lives in front of everyone.” She pointed out. “That’s why we keep you around, as a safety vent.”

“I know, but he’s stubborn.” Kili admitted.

“Are you still planning to leave?” Tauriel whispered to him.

“If it gets worse again, then yes.” Kili whispered back.

“By the way I’ve got a present for you.” Tauriel opened her bag and gave him a small box.

“It’s not my birthday yet!” He smiled at her.

“Call it an early birthday present.” Tauriel smirked.

“Oh great, in the era of modern technology you bought me a digital watch.” Kili sniggered seeing the present.

“It’s not a watch you dim wit.” She smirked. “Take a closer look.”

“It’s a...” Kili gasped and smiled.

“A beautiful watch.” She sniggered. “That’s the official version.” She winked at him.

“You’re the best!” Kili smiled at her.

“Ditto!” She smiled back. “Let’s go we have maths now!” She pulled him from the canteen into their classroom.

\-----

“I was wondering, your birthday is just five weeks away.” Thorin told the boys at dinner. “Would you like to throw a party?” He asked.

“I haven’t thought much about it.” Fili told his uncle.

“I don’t like parties.” Kili added his bit.

“Your mom should be back by then, so if we don’t plan something she will.” Thorin made them realise.

“If a party, I don’t want it here in the house.” Fili told his uncle firmly.

“Why not book a floor in the Arkenstone?” Thorin noticed. “We can get one of the VIP suites and invite all your friends. The hotel staff will take care of organizing, cleaning and everything in between.”

“That actually sounds good.” Fili noticed, gazing at Kili who seemed withdrawn again. “Are we making one big party? Not all out friends like each other...” Fili noticed.

“I don’t give a shit. I’m not inviting any of my friends to your stupid party.” Kili looked upset and walked out.

“Kili!” Bilbo called after him, but the boy quickly ran up the stairs.

“Leave him be. I’ll talk to him later when he calms down.” Thorin assured Bilbo.

\-----

“Kili?” Fili asked hesitantly walking into his brother’s bedroom.

“What?” Kili growled at him.

“What’s bugging you?” He asked gently.

“I don’t want any fucking party.” Kili hid his face in his pillow.

“Can I organize it anyway?” Fili asked in a tense voice.

“Do what the fuck you want!” Kili yelled at him.

“Will you come?” Fili asked sitting down on the bed next to him.

“What do you fucking care?” Kili spat at him.

“I care!” Fili grabbed his arm and pulled him closer. “You’re the only person in this whole fucked up world I care about, so yes I do care!”

“You mean it?” Kili asked in a shaking voice.

“I mean it.” Fili told him firmly. “I’m not sure how long we’ll be able to continue this, but I really want to go to university with you.”

“You mean it?” Kili asked with tears in his eyes.

“I do!” Fili brought him closer and closed his arms around him. “It’s just a party. Our symbolic passage to adulthood. Our real passage has already happened, but they don’t need to know about it, do they?” He sealed their lips together.

“I love you...” Kili wrapped his arms around Fili’s neck.

“And I love you...” Fili pressed them tightly against each other.

\-----

Thorin sent Ori, his new assistant to get him documents for the new hotel in Madrid and in meantime he decided to check on his sister.

“So are you having fun in Los Angeles?” Thorin asked Dis on the phone.

“Yeah, it’s all great! I love the weather here. Do you think we could possible move the company here?” She asked in a light tone.

“London is our home.” Thorin replied firmly. “We’ve already began preparing for Fili’s birthday party.” He changed the topic.

“Really? Without me?” Dis gasped disappointed.

“I’ve booked a floor in the Arkenstone, and we’re doing a huge banquet.” Thorin told her ignoring her reaction.

“What a fantastic idea!” Dis agreed. “I’ll come back by then, and I’ll oversee the catering and details.” She informed him.

“So what’s next in your schedule?” Thorin asked changing the topic yet again.

“I’m going to Las Vegas.” She laughed gently.

“It seems you’re planning to have a great time!” Thorin caught the merriness in her voice.

“I’ve got some great ideas. I’ll tell you everything when I come back.” She gasped with delight in her voice.

“Just don’t go on a gambling spree!” He scolded her gently.

“No way, we can’t afford to lose any money, can we?” Dis smiled. “I’m not as stupid as dad.” She reminded him.

“I hope so.” Thorin remarked.

“I’ll be in touch, take care of my boys!” She reminded him.

“I will.” Thorin replied and hung up.

Dis glanced at her phone with a smirk. She had been thinking for a long time about the company troubles and their families financial situation. And finally she found the perfect solution. She gazed at a newspaper on her bed. And with a predatory smirk she traced the face of the older man on the cover. “It’ll be a pleasure to meet you Mr Fundin.” She gasped to herself and giggled. She hadn’t been this excited since her favourite fashion collection from Lara Wong.

\------

Dwalin was irritated as hell. He had seen his brother infatuated with women before, but this one was over the limit. Her fake British accent, her flimsy expensive clothes and the everlasting fake smile on her lips. But Balin was so much enamoured with this woman that it was driving his brother crazy.

She was just another gold digger, that was for sure. He could easily valuate how much cash she was wearing, or at the probably fake jewellery. The moment he saw the woman for the first time he had their most trusted lawyer investigate her background, and Mr. Beorn firmly told him that no such a person under the name Daisy Woodland existed.

The day he wanted to confront his brother about her, he saw her yet again with him at breakfast, gazing at the old man flirtatiously. Dwalin had to admit, she was young and beautiful.

He spat out his accusation and confronted both of them, but his brother just gently smiled.

“I know everything about her.” Balin spoke with a kind smile on his face.

“So what’s her real name?” Dwalin was dumb folded.

“Desire!” Balin laughed gently. “What a beautiful name!”

“She’s only with you for the money!” Dwalin spat out another accusation.

“And what is money compared to the rest of my life in happiness?” Balin held Dis’s hand firmly and with love. “We’re getting married.” He announced cutting his brother’s accusations.

“Will you at least sign a marital agreement?” Dwalin spat at them.

“Of course we will.” Balin smiled.

“That’s the most important part.” Dis told him gently. “A marriage based on dishonestly will never work.” She smiled.

“And how can you know that?” Dwalin told her in a firm tone.

“She was married before.” Balin slowly told him.

“Was she?” Dwalin’s voice was ice cold.

“We divorced after two years.” She told him sadly. “It was a bad match. And we were both very unhappy. He left me with debts to pay and a broken heart. I don’t know what would happen to me if not for my boys, my sunlight in the darkness.” She made a sad face and Balin rushed to brush her face gently.

“So you have children?” Dwalin spoke in an even more cold voice.

“Two sons, Fili and Kili.” She told him.

“You can’t be serious about this brother.” Dwalin scolded Balin. “You’re not only taking her as your wife, but you’ll be sharing responsibility for two kids!”

“I always wanted to have a family and this is my chance.” Balin smiled at Dis warmly.

“If you’re here who is taking care of your boys?” Dwalin asked wittingly.

“My beloved brother. He’s been helping me out, he loves the boys as if they were his own kids.” Dis smiled at them warmly.

“Brother my ass...” Dwalin mumbled and left clearly very irritated.

\-----

“Is there anything we can to stop him?” He asked Mr. Beorn their lawyer.

“He’s an adult he can make any decision he wants.” Mr. Beorn noticed. “He already gave me guidelines for the marital agreement.”

“How much money is he giving her?” Dwalin asked trough clenched teeth.

“To her personally none.” Mr. Beorn told him grimly. “But he made a promise to finance her brother’s business for a billion.”

“This is just some kind of insane nightmare!” Dwalin hit his head against the wall.

“You’ve got three days.” Mr. Beorn told him grimly.

“For what?” Dwalin gazed at him.

“They are getting married in three days, and later they are flying to London to meet her family.” Mr. Beorn informed him in a dull voice. “They are taking the jet on Thursday afternoon.”

“I’ll be there.” Dwalin mumbled with defeat.


	23. Chapter 23

The preparation for the party was going smoothly. Fili set the menu, the decorations and Kili even took part in some of the meetings at Arkenstone.

Surprisingly their mother was late. She was due to come back nearly three weeks ago, but she called saying something important came up.

Fili felt relieved and so did Kili.

A day before the birthday party Dis finally texted Thorin she was coming to the Arkenstone, and to book her a room.

‘Aren’t you coming home?’ Thorin texted back.

‘After the party!’ she replied curtly, Thorin just raised his eyebrows.

‘As you wish!’ He replied and called in his new secretary Ori, the youngest brother of Dori one of his directors.

“Ori!” He called.

“Yes Mr. Durin.” Ori showed up swiftly.

“Call the Arkenstone and book a suite for my sister, she wants to stay around for the party.” Thorin ordered. “Find someone to fly to Cannes, I need some paperwork done over there. And tell Bilbo I need someone to check on my sister the moment she arrives, she’s up to something.”

“Yes sir!” Ori quickly agreed.

\-----

Bilbo arrived at the Arkenstone to oversee the last details and to make sure Dis had arrived safely. But his smiled died the moment he saw her. She was smiling widely and she was closely followed by two men. One looked like a good old banker, grey hair and polite. While the other looked like a head of a drug cartel. The man was tall, bald with tattoos on his head.

“Dis!” He greeted her warmly.

“Bilbo darling!” Dis hugged him. “It’s so good to see you! How are the preparations for the party?” She asked and Bilbo took her to the reception desk to show her what has been prepared.

“Party?” Dwalin gasped to his brother. “So this is where your billion is going...” He sniggered.

“Bilbo I’d like you to meet my husband Balin, and his brother Dwalin.” Dis finally introduced him.

“Balin, this is Bilbo Baggins, a good friend and practically family.” She introduced the small blond man.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Balin politely nodded.

“Likewise!” Bilbo smiled at the man, but still in shock from the news.

“So where are my boys?” She asked impatiently.

“It’s still early, they are at school.” Bilbo told her. “But they should arrive just after to oversee the final preparation.”

“Can you give me Tauriel’s phone number I need to talk to her.” Dis smiled at him.

“Let’s go inside, I got the keys to your suite.” Bilbo gently told her with a smile.

Bilbo quickly reached for his phone and gave Dis the number, an swiftly types a text message to Thorin. ‘We have a problem.” He warned him.

“Tauriel darling I wanted to talk to you!” Dis smiled as she was speaking.

“Yeah, I’m back to London, can we meet this afternoon?” Dis smiled again. “Thank you darling! I’m at the Arkenstone!”

“She’s going to arrive with my boys in the afternoon.” She smiled to her husband. “She’s like a daughter to me, you’ll love her!” Dis assured him warmly.

“I can’t wait to meet your kids!” Balin smiled warmly.

“Kids?” Bilbo’s eyebrows went up comically. “I need to get going, I need to get some papers done!” He rushed out, and the moment he was in the corridor he pulled out his phone.

“Thorin we have a serious problem.” He announced. “Come to Arkenstone as fast as possible. I’ll be waiting in the office.”

“This is all strange.” Dwalin whispered to Balin, as his new sister in law rushed to unpack her bags.

“Get that stick out of your ass.” Balin scolded him.

\----

“What’s going on?” Thorin found Bilbo in state of panic in the main office at the Arkenstone.

“Your sister...” Bilbo gasped. “She...”

“Spit it out, what in Mahal’s name did she do now?” Thorin went pale.

“She got married, to some old guy, that’s why she wanted to book a suite here and not go home!” Bilbo said the whole sentence in a flash.

“She what!?” Thorin yelled and sat down. “Why the hell would she do something like that!”

“We should go and talk to her, before the boys find out.” Bilbo made him noticed. “They will be here within the hour.”

“Fucking shit!” Thorin hit the desk with his fist.

“Breath, calm down before you have a heart attack...” Bilbo gave him a glass of water and forced him to sit back down.

“Maybe that’s what she wants?” Thorin asked in a grin voice.

“She’s not thinking again, it’s as simple as that.” Bilbo gently told him. “I’m here right by your side, I’ll help you sort this shit out.” Bilbo assured him with a kind smile.

“You’re the best person in the world...” Thorin gasped and in a spur of emotion pulled the smaller man closer and sealed their lips together.

“As much as I love what you’re doing...” Bilbo squirmed out of Thorin’s embrace. “We have to face her before the boys come, she also invited Tauriel...We’ll have time to talk later...”

“Fucking great...” Thorin mumbled and obediently followed Bilbo.

\-----

“Baggins as in Baggins from Bag End?” Dwalin whispered to Balin.

“I’m not sure.” Balin mumbled. “Remind me, why did they go bankrupt?”

“If I remember correctly gambling.” Dwalin was very worried. “What the hell did you get us into?” Dwalin scolded his older brother.

“You’re finally here!” Dis squeaked from the doorway.

Dwalin and Balin both gazed at the handsome dark haired man she was leading their way.

“Thorin darling, I’d like you to meet my husband Balin, Balin this is my brother Thorin.” She introduced them.

“Balin Fundin.” Balin decided to face this man head on.

“Thorin Durin.” Thorin shook his hand. He saw a surprised glare from Balin and Dwalin.

“This is my brother Dwalin.” Balin introduced his brother.

“I think we need to sit down and talk.” Thorin told Dis with a scowl.

“I have no secrets from my husband, he knows everything he should. I told him about our problems and he’s willing to help you.” Dis gasped with a smile.

“Just fucking great...” Thorin mumbled, and caught the surprised glare from Dwalin. “Mr. Fundin I think we should talk about the formal issues tomorrow, we shouldn’t burden women with such trivial matters.” Thorin immediately took control.

“Ms. Durin?” They heard a knock on the door.

“Tauriel darling!” Dis gasped seeing the girl walk in.

“You look fantastic Ms. Durin!” Tauriel praised her dress.

“Lara Wong!” Dis swirled like a little girl. “And it’s Mrs. Fundin now!

“I’ve been to her fashion show last week!” Tauriel was delighted.

“I have the perfect dress for you for tomorrow’s party!” Dis pulled her into the bedroom. “You’ll love it!”

“We really need to talk.” Thorin told the two men quickly. “But without her.”

“Clear.” Dwalin nodded. “Tomorrow just give us the address.”

“One of my assistants will pick you up.” Thorin nodded.

There was another knock on the door. Fili peaked in with a smile.

“I’m sorry if I’m interrupting anything, but the staff gave me this room number.” Fili smiled apologetically at his uncle.

“Come in Fili.” Thorin told him curtly.

“Fili, I think it’s time you meet Mr. Fundin.” Bilbo urged the boy to come closer.

“Mr. Fundin this is Fili. Fili this is your mother’s new husband Balin Fundin.” Thorin spoke quickly.

“What?” The smile on the boy’s face died and his eyes turned cold as he glanced at the elderly man.

“Is this some kind of crazy joke?” He scowled.

“Excuse me?” Dwalin spoke in a grim tone.

“Fucking best birthday present...” Fili mumbled evilly. “What the hell is she thinking, she’s out of control...” He spoke accusingly to his uncle.

“Fili manners!” Thorin scolded him.

“Not here!” Bilbo added gazing at both of the men in the room.

“Fili?” Dis entered the room. “I’m so happy to see you! How’s mommy’s favourite boy?” She hugged him with a smile.

“So this is your son?” Balin asked unsure, gazing at the practically adult boy.

“Fili did you meet my beloved husband?” Dis smiled at her son.

“You surprised me mom!” Fili’s usually smile was back on his face, and Thorin noticed for the first time just how good Fili was at pretending his moods.

“Hi Fili!” Tauriel came back.

“Hi Tauriel!” Fili greeted her curtly.

“Thank you for the dress!” Tauriel hugged Dis again, smiling holding a bag in her hands.

“Anything for my favourite future daughter!” Dis smiled.

“I’d better get going, I’m having my manicure done tonight.” Tauriel smiled and quickly left.

“Fili why don’t you walk Tauriel to her car?” Dis smiled happily.

“Of course mother!” Fili smiled and followed Tauriel.

“Your mother is fucking crazy!” Tauriel gasped as Fili was walking her to her car.

“You have no idea...” Fili grumbled.

\-----

“What’s going on?” Kili saw Fili all tense as he picked him up from archery and drove them home instead of going to the Arkenstone.

“Our mother!” Fili was walking around his room clearly irritated.

“What did she did this time?” Kili felt lost, the emotions from his brother following over him.

“She got married.” Fili spat out clearly losing it.

“What?” Kili gasped again.

“You heard me, she fucking got married to some fucking old geezer!” Fili began yelling.

“Why does that bother you so much?” Kili did not share his contempt.

“She’s putting everything in danger, our company, our heritage, our future... I don’t want a dad! Never again!” Fili broke down and began crying. Kili did not hesitate to wrap his arms around him.

“Why is having a dad so bad? I always wanted a dad...” Kili gasped.

“You have no idea! You have no idea how bad it is...” Fili began sobbing.

“Tell me what’s it like...” Kili gasped.

“It’s fucking hell! Life with him was fucking hell!” Fili was torn and crumbled.

“Tell me about it.. I never met him.” Kili spoke quietly.

“I can’t take it... I don’t want to have a dad ever again!” Fili continued sobbing.

“I’m here... You can tell me everything...” Kili encouraged him.

And slowly Fili did, with tears still following he told Kili about the years with his father. He said everything about what his dad did to him, about the pain. And Kili cried with him. The pain of what happened to Fili, the sexual activities he was forced to take part, the neglect and abuse was too much for both of them to handle.

“I love you Fili...” He held him tightly. “And I have something I need to confess.”

“What?” Fili asked surprised.

“You’ll see, I have a special present for you.” Kili told him quietly. “Just promise you won’t hate me...”

“I could never hate you...” Fili kissed him gently.

“Tomorrow we’re going to have to face them.” Kili told him slowly. “After the party the two of us are going to talk about my surprise for you...”

“But this is just so full of shit...” Fili continued crying.

“Our mom is full of shit...” Kili told him firmly. “And so was our dad. No wonder we’re so fucked up.”

“No wonder...” Fili gasped and hid more into his brother’s arms


	24. Chapter 24

Thorin met with Balin and Dwalin in the morning. Both men were clearly surprised with the posh office and huge office building.

“Dear gentlemen, I have absolutely no idea what my sister did to get you both into this mess, but my first question should be, did you sign a marital agreement?” Thorin spoke in his normal business style.

“We have.” Balin confirmed.

“Can I be informed of the details?” Thorin asked, and Balin pulled out the document. Thorin gazed at the legal document with crossed brows.

“Ori, please call in Gloin.” Thorin spoke calmly.

When the lawyer showed up, Thorin gave him the document without a word and motioned him to leave.

“Has my sister informed you of our financial situation?” Thorin asked slowly.

“She said your company has been suffering recently.” Balin spoke slowly. “But I had no idea it was a company of this size.” The older man gazed at the office.

“I told you she was yet another gold digger.” Dwalin mumbled.

“Quite the contrary. I believe my sister is not fully aware of our financial situation.” Thorin spoke slowly.

“So your debts are even bigger?” Dwalin gasped. “Or is that Baggins lover of yours losing everything gambling just like he did with his family company?”

“Leave Bilbo out of this.” Thorin spoke in a deadly tone. “Dear Mr. Fundin, by reading your generous offer for my sister I take it you really feel affection for her?” Thorin asked unfazed.

“I do, she’s so cheerful and positive.” Balin told him honestly. “If your troubles are greater please name it.”

“Contrary, I do not require any financial aid.” Thorin spoke slowly. “Erebor is doing just fine.”

“Erebor?” Dwalin gasped.

“But Dis said the situation is dramatic...” Balin suddenly became serious.

“I might have suggested we needed to cut back on certain luxuries she thinks essential.” Thorin spoke in a gentle mocking tone. “I should have known she would think of a third option.”

“So she spends a lot?” Dwalin insisted.

“Not more than a woman of her status.” Thorin said. “I simply tried to make her think more of the family business.”

“So you mean you wanted to teach her a lesson?” Dwalin asked.

“If you chose to chose such wording...” Thorin told them slowly. “Don’t get me wrong, I love my sister, but she has many faults and is spoiled.”

“What do you mean?” Balin spoke slowly.

“My sister is rather selfish.” Thorin told them slowly. “And she has made many mistakes in her life, especially when it comes to both her sons.”

“What do you mean?” Dwalin mumbled.

“She favours Fili, the one you met, over the other, and she shows it openly. I took custody over the boys several months ago, and ever since we’ve been going to family therapy, but it’s been difficult.” Thorin told them openly.

“How old are the boys?” Dwalin asked surprised.

“Today they are eighteen, meaning they are legally adults.” Thorin told them slowly observing their reaction.

“Both of them?” Balin asked suddenly. “From what she said I thought they were much younger...”

“They’re twins.” Thorin told him calmly. “She treats them as kids, that’s why I had to step in. My heirs need to become independent people. She spoiled Fili beyond measure, it’s surprising he’s actually normal after it, while she neglected Kili which unfortunately had a huge impact on him.”

“So you mean the other boy is troubled?” Balin asked kindly.

“It will take a lot of therapy to sort out his problems.” Thorin told them. “Although I will have to ask out therapist to talk with Fili as well. His reaction to your marriage was pretty severe considering he’s normally the quiet and calm brother.”

“So you do not expect any help in terms of financial matters, but maybe will I be able to help in terms of family issues?” Balin spoke slowly.

“We will have to discuss business, but only to our mutual profit. I would be glad if you look after my sister and make her happy. Preferably far away from London.” Thorin clarified. “I would also wish that you stay in our house, if she stays at the hotel she’ll interrupt the party, and I promised the boys we would avoid that.”

“Just how much is that party going to cost?” Dwalin asked in a deadly tone.

“As I’ve already clarified, I do not expect any financial help. I own the Arkenstone so you can say it doesn’t cost you anything.” Thorin spoke in a grim tone.

“The Arkenstone?” Balin gasped thinking of the luxurious hotel.

“I own nearly thirty hotels of the same standard.” Thorin spoke casually.

“Just how rich are you?” Dwalin gazed at him suspiciously.

“Not your league.” Thorin just smirked. “You would have to add one more digit.” He added after a moment. “My sister overreacted a bit. Financially we’re doing just fine. If you ever need any support, we can offer it. She still owns some stocks of Erebor, and she is entitled to a profit from the company.”

“We’d like to stay at the hotel, I’ll personally see to that she doesn’t take part in the party.” Balin told Thorin slowly. “We’ll return to the business side of this union at a later date, I need to think this over. On my behalf I can assure you I will take good care of your sister.” The older man smiled gently.

“That’s all I’m asking for.” Thorin agreed. “I’ll meet you at the hotel for lunch.”

“It was a pleasure to meet you.” Balin shook his hand.

\------

“Are you ready?” Kili gently asked Tauriel as she was swirling around in the dress Dis gave her.

“As ready as I’ll ever be!” She smiled at him.

They were waiting for the party in their suite, it was a large VIP suite with three bedrooms they shared with Legolas and Fili.

“I’m going to talk to your mother first, and thank her again for the dress. I’ll make sure she won’t show up... So you mingle with Legolas and I’ll come back soon.” She kissed his cheek. “Don’t you dare stain that shirt with food.” She warned his as he was eating something before the party.

“Yeah right...” He mumbled.

“I’ll see you!” She quickly left.

“You look great!” Fili praised her, he quickly sat down next to Legolas and Kili and began snaking with them.

“Men, there is going to be a tone of food at the party and you have to eat like right now...” Tauriel scolded the three. “Where is Sigrid?” She asked Fili cautiously.

“She will arrive just for the party.” Fili clarified.

“Great so I’m the only girlfriend officially spending the night with my boyfriend! Everyone will think I’m a slut!” Tauriel groaned.

“I’m your chaperon, so relax sis!” Legolas scolded her. “Get going!”

“Fine I’m out!” Tauriel shut the door.

“If I see your mom I will let you know.” Legolas assured Kili.

“I will handle her if she comes to the party.” Fili added.

“Uncle said her new husband agreed to keep an eye on her.” Kili told them.

“We’ll see just how good at keeping her on a leash he is...” Legolas smirked.

\-----

Tauriel walked up to the door and knocked.

“Tauriel?” Dis opened the door. “Oh my God I knew this dress was perfect for you!” She guided the girl into the suite. “Doesn’t she look stunning?” She asked Balin.

“You’re really beautiful!” Balin complimented the girl.

“Thank you Mr. Fundin!” Tauriel smiled politely. “I just wanted to show up and thank you yet again for the dress, it’s fantastic!”

“Anything for my future daughter!” Dis smiled happily. “Why don’t you sit down and have some tea with us? We’re leaving soon for the opera!” Dis smiled.

“I’d really like that.” Tauriel smiled and sat down.

“So is Fili prepared?” Dis asked her.

“The last time I saw him he was all ready, he’s with my brother. The guests haven’t begun arriving yet.” Tauriel spoke gently, and added a bit of sugar to her tea.

“So how long have you been together with Fili?” Balin asked with a kind smile.

“I’m Kili’s girlfriend, not Fili’s.” Tauriel clarified calmly.

“Just a minor detail...” Dis smile did not fade. “Has that placid girl arrived yet? What was her name? Sigrid?” Dis asked.

“Not yet.” Tauriel replied politely unfazed with the suggestion.

Balin gazed from his wife to the girl, and suddenly he realised he heard tones of information about Fili the last few days, but this was the first time anyone spoke of Kili in his presence.

“I hope you have a great time! I regret I can’t come and oversee everything, but my darling husband barely managed to get us tickets for The Moscow Ballet which is having just one show tonight.” Dis told her calmly.

“You got tickets? My step mom wanted to go, but they were all sold out!” Tauriel gasped. “I’m actually jealous!” She added with a smile.

“I see you put on the opals I brought you from Australia!” Dis noticed.

“They are my favourite!” Tauriel smiled honestly. “It’s the best present ever! My step mom... well she doesn’t buy me things, so you cannot even imagine how much this means to me...” Tauriel gently traced her fingers over the necklace.

“You’re practically family!” Dis exclaimed and hugged her with a huge smile. “The only good thing that no good son of mine ever did was bring you over to us!”

“I better get going!” Tauriel glanced at the time. “The party is going to start soon and I want all the girls to know their place...”

“None can even begin to compare to you!” Dis smiled and complimented her again. “Have a good time darling!” She kissed Tauriel’s cheek and walked her to the door.

“A very charming girl.” Balin told his wife.

“She’s just amazing.” Dis told him. “Too bad she chose the wrong son, but things might change in the future. Unfortunately she comes from that snobbish family.”

“What family is she from?” Balin asked curiously.

“Mirkwood.” Dis spat at him.

“Mirkwood as in Mirkwood International?” Balin gazed at her with surprise.

“One and the same.” Dis grunted. “Our families have always been competing so this union is unexpected to say the least. But she’s such a great soul that her last name does not matter much to me...” she assured him with a smile.

Soon Thorin arrived at their suite.

“Darling brother guess what my husband got us tickets for the Moscow Ballet!” Dis hugged him happily.

“That’s fantastic!” Thorin smiled and nodded at Balin. Who nodded back, unfazed with the two tickets that suddenly were delivered in the early afternoon.

“I just wanted to make sure everything is fine with the party, I don’t want to interrupt you.” Thorin noticed.

“We still got an hour to leave, so please sit down and have some tea with us!” Dis smiled and motioned him to take a seat.

“With pleasure I’d like to get to know your husband a bit better.” Thorin noticed politely.

“I’ve been meaning to ask you, has the renovation of the Cannes house commenced?” Dis asked with a smile.

“Not yet, the boys are still working on the project.” Thorin noticed calmly.

“So would it be a problem if we spend some time over there? I’d like to show Balin how beautiful it is!” Dis smiled.

“By all means please do!” Thorin smiled.

“What about Erebor?” Dis smiled again.

“You can visit it as well. In three weeks we’re going over there to assess what needs to be changed, so it’s untouched so far.” Thorin informed her.

“Fantastic!” Dis nearly jumped out of her seat. “Balin needs a bit of rest, his brother volunteered to take care of the boring paperwork.”

“That’s very kind of him.” Thorin smiled.

“I haven’t told you yet, but Fili did a phenomenal project for the new Madrid hotel.” Dis told her husband.

“Yes, they boys are very talented.” Thorin gently corrected her. “Madrid is going to be the best hotel in our chain, once we finish I’ll invite you both for the grand opening.”

“That’s interesting. I own seven hotels as well, so I’d like to see the standard your dictating.” Balin smiled.

“Madrid is going to be just breathtaking! The whole project is just so phenomenal and daring! I knew my Fili had it in him, he always drew beautifully, but what he did for that hotel was unlike anything I’ve ever seen! And I’ve seen tones of hotels!” Dis was clearly very enthusiastic.

“Yes, the project is unique in any aspect. Almost everything will be manufactured by custom made designs. The boys really put in a lot of effort.” Thorin continued changing the form from singular to plural, sending a clear signal to Balin that Dis ignored the fact that not one son worked on the project.

“Do you mind if I come by the office tomorrow and take a look?” Balin gently asked. “I’d like to talk with the boys about the project to get to know them better.”

“By all mean please do. I’ll arrange it.” Thorin agreed. “I’d better get going, I have still some issues to resolve before the party.”

“It was a pleasure to see you again!” Balin smiled honestly.

“Likewise!” Thorin shook his hand.

“I’ll see you tomorrow!” Dis kissed his cheek.

 

 


	25. Chapter 25

The party began as planned. Kili wasn’t enthusiastic, especially when all of Fili’s friends began arriving, but Tauriel kept him close and held him firmly in place. Legolas did everything to keep them busy and they three spent most of the time together. After some time Fili showed up with Sigrid at his side, but the girl was even more withdrawn and silent.

Legolas used the first chance to ask Sigrid for a dance, to get her away from Kili and Fili. Tauriel noticing her chance to make them mingle just said she had to go to the toilet, leaving the two brothers.

“Are you bored?” Fili asked with a smirk.

“A bit.” Kili agreed sipping on his drink.

“We don’t have to be here all night...” Fili told him with a smirk. “I’ve got some plans...” He spoke in a low flirtatious tone.

“An hour more?” Kili suggested and was rewarded with a smirk.

“I’ll see you at the west lift.” Fili nodded to him and mixed with the guests again.

The moment Sigrid ditched Legolas she found Fili back with Dain and Gimli.

“There is your beautiful girl!” Dain sniggered.

“A dance?” She asked with a timid smile.

“Why not!” Fili smiled and put away his empty glass and guided her to the dance floor.

“Why do you spend time with them?” Sigrid asked him gently. “It’s not like they are even likable.”

“Why do you say so?” Fili’s eyes became narrow.

“You’re a very nice person, but some of your friends... are just plain mean.” Sigrid complained.

“At least they are not boring.” Fili added grimly.

“Am I boring?” The girl asked suddenly.

“No. You’re fun.” Fili told her curtly.

“Fun...” Sigrid’s lips went narrow.

“You’re my girlfriend...” Fili told her gently.

“Am I really?” She looked at him seriously. “Then why can’t I even spend this night with you?”

“I respect you too much...” Fili told her with a gentle smile.

“To much to show you want me or love me?” She asked grimly.

Fili gazed at her silently unsure how to answer such an accusation.

“I get it, I might not be as beautiful as Tauriel. I get it I might not be fun and daring. But I would appreciate my own boyfriend to at least like me a bit.” Sigrid spoke bitterly. “You don’t kiss me really, you don’t touch me... You behave as if I am just a friend...”

“I don’t know what you mean...” Fili felt lost.

“Tell me honestly, how would you react if I told you I’ve been dreaming of having sex with you?” She asked trying to be outgoing.

“I thought so...” She sniggered as he was silent again. “How would you react if I would really kiss you?” She asked again, and when he was silent for a longer time, she wrapped her arm around him, and forced him into a deep sensual kiss, pressing her body against him.

Someone next to them began clapping, but Sigrid felt disappointed. As she gently let go, she could feel her boyfriend not react to the daring assault she just did. He was unmoved and not attracted to her.

“Why the hell do you need a girlfriend you don’t even like to kiss girls?” She hissed at him, and ran out with tears in her eyes.

He followed her with grim thoughts in his head. He found her weeping the corridor away from the party.

“I’m sorry...” He gently told her. “It’s just...”

“Girls don’t really work for you, do they?” She gasped adding all the facts together. He just nodded.

“So I was just a cover to cover up the fact that you’re gay?” She hissed.

“I didn’t want to hurt you... I just like you...” Fili tried to calm her down.

“As a friend...” She was devastated.

“I’ll call your brother to pick you up...” He proposed.

“So this means it’s over?” She asked in a voice full of pain.

“It means you need to calm down and think this over.” Fili gently told her. “I don’t want to break up with you...”

“But you don’t want to fuck me either...” She gasped annoyed.

“I just can’t...” Fili confessed.

“We’ll talk sometime later...” She pulled out her phone and called her brother Bain to pick her up.

“Don’t worry I’ll be waiting in the lobby, go and have fun!” She spat at him and ran towards the lift.

Fili returned to the party feeling lost and hollow, he grabbed the first drink a waiter was carrying around and decided not to think about what just happened. After the fourth drink he felt Legolas pull him away.

“Calm down, where is Sigrid?” Legolas asked him worried.

“She left me.” Fili told him bluntly.

“It’s not like you loved her, so why do you care...” Legolas spat at him.

“I just don’t like hurting people...” Fili told him.

“So stop getting wasted, or you’ll hurt the one person who really loves you....” Legolas hissed.

“You think so?’ Fili asked surprised.

“I do...” Legolas insisted. “Leave them... they are having a great time with you or without you...” They gazed at the drunk dancing crowd.

“Come on!” Legolas pulled him towards the lift, where Kili was already waiting for them.

“Have fun!” Legolas smiled and handed Fili a key, and pushed both of them into the elevator.

“You’re drunk...” Kili scolded him as the door closed on them.

“My girlfriend just left me...” Fili hissed.

“Good for me...” Kili noticed and pulled him into his arms. They kissed each other deeply and feverishly feeling safe in the small space.

A polite grunt brought them back to reality as the lift stopped and took one more passenger. They broke the kiss with hesitant smiles and held hands trying to seem invisible.

Soon they reached the floor the room was at, and Fili pulled Kili along without a word. As the door closed both boys did not noticed the hawk eyes glancing at them with contempt.

\----

Finally being alone with his brother Dwalin urged Balin to come to his room.

“What did you want to talk about?” Balin was a bit worried.

“This new family of ours is pretty strange.” Dwalin spoke coldly.

“What do you mean?” Balin asked suddenly.

“I’ve just seen your new step son make out with a boy in the lift, and later pull him into a hotel room.” Dwalin spat out.

“But he has a girlfriend from what I understand...” Balin gasped surprised.

“Clearly he prefers fucking boys to girls... I can tell you one thing, the way they were kissing I doubt they are reading books or watching TV...” Dwalin added grimly pouring himself a whiskey.

“My wife will be devastated...” Balin gasped.

“Is him being gay such a problem for you?” Dwalin spoke thinking of his own hidden preferences.

“Not at all. It’s just, she thinks so highly of him, it might hurt her.” Balin noticed.

“So what are we going to do about it?” Dwalin urged his brother.

“Absolutely nothing. The boy’s preferences are his own business.” Balin told him calmly. “If he decides to come out, I’ll support him, and try to calm her down, but until then I see no point in discussing this publicly.”

“How was the ballet?” Dwalin sniggered.

“Better than I thought it would be.” Balin noticed. “Tomorrow I’m going to the office to see the new project for the Madrid hotel. It seem both boys drew the whole design.”

“That’s rather surprising considering their age.” Dwalin noticed.

“That’s why I’d like you to come with me. Your professional opinion would be invaluable.” Balin told him gently.

“Fine, but later in the afternoon I’m flying home. Our company won’t run by itself for long!” Dwalin hissed.

“I hope you don’t mind I’m taking a few days off?” Balin asked hesitantly.

“By all means please do, you deserve a break.” Dwalin encouraged him.

\----

Fili awoke with a huge headache, he stretched lazily in bed with the feeling of his warm brother right next to him. Last night was hazy, but he had a feeling a lot of things happened.

“Good morning Sunshine!” Kili told him with a huge smile.

“Good morning Lover boy!” Fili kissed him deeply.

“As much as I’d love fucking yet again, I think we better take a shower and return to our room...” Kili scolded him.

“Can we have sex in the shower?” Fili smirked.

“Of course we can!” Kili kissed him and snuggled closer.

“What do you mean return to our room?” Fili asked finally adding all the information together.

“We’re in a room Legolas booked.” Kili told him gently.

“He thinks of everything...” Fili sniggered.

“It’s more like he wanted some privacy himself...” Kili noticed with a smirk. “Move it gorgeous!” He pulled Fili to his legs and dragged him into the bathroom.

“You’re fucking adorable...” Fili pushed Kili into the shower wall with a chaste move.

“And we have just enough time for you to prove it to me...” Kili gasped feeling his brother’s warm lips caress his skin.

\-----

“It’s nice to see you both back...” Tauriel stretched with a wide grin on the sofa in their suite. “Good that you took the other room, Dain and Gimli were trying to find you last night...”

“What did they want?” Fili asked in a deadly voice drinking a coffee.

“Something about a drinking competition...” Legolas sniggered. “Anyway we ditched them.”

“So what are your plans for today?” Tauriel asked them with a smirk.

“Uncle said we should come by the office...” Kili told her slowly.

“Today?” Tauriel gasped annoyed.

“It has something to do with our step father...” Kili gasped annoyed.

Tauriel glanced at them. “You’re taking a taxi.” He decided gazing at Fili. “I’m not losing both of you just because you have a crazy hangover.”

“Crystal clear...” Fili groaned holding his head.

“At what time did uncle want us in the office?” Kili gazed at the time.

“At noon I think.” Fili replied curtly.

“Shit we got like fifteen minutes to get there!” Kili urged him to move.

“I’ll call reception to get you a taxi.” Tauriel dialled room service.

“Thanks!” Kili smiled at her and dragged Fili out of the door.

“Is it me or do they know?” Fili spoke in a deadly tone as they got into the taxi.

“They always knew.” Kili told him. “And they don’t mind.”

“Fucking great, next thing you’ll tell me they are fucking each other...” Fili sniggered ignoring the taxi driver who was gazing at them curiously.

“Because they are...” Kili hissed with a grin.

“Fucking fantastic!” Fili hissed and rested his head against the seat.

“Come on!” Kili pulled him out and paid for the taxi and dragged him into the office.

 


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ta dam da dam! The last chapter - the sequel will begin tomorrow so subscribe to me if you don't want to miss it!

“Boys!” Bilbo called for them. “You’re late! Thorin is already sitting at a meeting with Mr. Fundin and his brother!”

“I need a pain killer!” Fili complained.

“He’s got a hangover and he’s acting like a bitch...” Kili complained to Bilbo.

“I heard that...” Fili gasped annoyed.

“Come on I have something in my office...” Bilbo pulled them to the lift.

Bilbo gave Fili a glass of water and a painkiller. “Move it, your uncle is annoyed as it is.”

“You’re late!” Thorin scolded Kili the moment he sneaked into the conference room. Their design was on display on the huge TV.

“We’re sorry!” Kili gasped and took a seat opposite the two men.

“Balin and Dwalin, this is Kili, my second nephew.” Thorin calmly introduced him.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Kili replied politely, a bit startled by the intensive glare he got from the tall bald man.

“The pleasure is all mine.” Balin calmly greeted the boy.

“Where is your brother?” Thorin gazed at Kili.

“He’s not feeling well. He should be here soon.” Kili quickly explained.

Bilbo soon walked in with Fili and showed him to a chair. The blond slumped into in and clearly he had problems focusing on anything.

“So I take the party was great?” Thorin sniggered.

“Better than great!” Fili replied with a smile, then he gazed at the two men sitting opposite him, and somehow he felt uneasy under their glare.

“I’m not sure he should be here with us, he’s in pretty bad shape.” Bilbo whispered to Thorin.

“It’s our only chance to have this meeting, so we cannot postpone it.” Thorin spoke to them. “Your mother’s husband and his brother will be an important part of our family now, so today I want to talk about how our relations will develop in the future.” Thorin began explaining his vision of the business relations between the two companies.

Fili suddenly caught the gaze of Dwalin, his step father’s brother, the way the man was looking at him suddenly seemed familiar. He couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off. He gazed back at Kili, and again back to Dwalin, who clearly was gazing at both of them with an usual weight in his eyes.

He tried to focused his brain, and then it hit him. He remembered those eyes gazing at him last night... in the elevator... His stomach made a painful twist, and suddenly he want pale.

“Are you okay?” Kili’s gentle voice reached him.

“No!” Fili gasped and ran to the nearest bathroom.

“Just fucking great... Just how much did he drink last night?” Thorin asked Kili in a firm voice.

“I have no idea, he was drinking with Dain and Gimli.” Kili quickly said. “I’ll go check on him.” He rushed out of the conference room.

“I’ll go after them.” Bilbo quickly realized there was something deeply wrong going on.

\-----

“Breathe...” Kili told Fili holding his head up as he was throwing up his breakfast.

“He saw us...” Fili hissed in between vomit attacks.

“What do you mean?” Kili whispered.

“Yesterday, in the elevator...” Fili gasped, Kili gazed at him with crossed brows, and realization suddenly hit him.

“He saw us...” He went suddenly pale. “Oh fucking shit!” He gasped.

“Are you okay?” Bilbo calm voice startled both of them.

“Kili are you going to vomit as well? You look awfully pale!” Bilbo noticed and helped the brunet to sit down on the floor.

“I thought I was okay, but suddenly I felt weak...” Kili complained.

“I’ll go tell your uncle you both need more time.” Bilbo told them gently. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

“Run away with me.” Kili whispered to Fili.

“What do you fucking mean run away?” Fili hissed.

“I got it all worked out, I got the money.” Kili told him.

“And just fucking leave? Leave home? Our family? Our school? The company?” Fili hissed angrily. “No fucking way!”

“That way we could be together...” Kili whispered with defeat.

“And we would have nothing!” Fili gasped. “You’re fucking crazy!”

“We’re done for!” Kili made him realise. “He knows!”

“Fucking hell!” Fili hit his head against the toilet. “This fucking hangover is going to kill me.”

“Run away with me, we’ll be fine and we’ll be together!” Kili insisted.

“I’m not going anywhere!” Fili gasped. “I can’t just fucking go and leave!”

“Fine!” Kili gasped with despair. “Stay here and rot!” He darted out of the bathroom.

“Fili?” Bilbo came back after some time to check on them. “Are you okay?” He gently patted the boy’s back.

“Where is Kili?” Bilbo’s question rang dully in the bathroom.

“I don’t know.” Fili replied gloomily.

“I’ll go talk to Thorin.” Bilbo told him gently.

\-----

“Are you sure?” Balin asked Dwalin with a stern voice. “You cannot go say such things without proof.”

“I know what I saw...” Dwalin insisted.

“Keep it to yourself!” Balin hissed when he saw Thorin come back to the office.

“It seems the boys don’t feel well enough to continue the meeting, for which I apologize.” Thorin told them calmly.

“You can’t blame them, they just had a big event.” Balin told him calmly. “We can meet them when I come back from my holiday with Dis.” He smiled calmly.

“Let’s continue with the official issues, and later I’ll show you the project.” Thorin quickly added.

\-----

“Are you sure you have no idea where Kili is?” Bilbo asked Fili for like the hundredth time.

He had called Tauriel, but she said she had no idea where he was.

When Kili did not come back within half an hour he decided to call the housekeeper Mrs. Bringsbee.

“He was here just a moment ago.” She told him. “I’ll go take a look in his room.” She walked up to the bedroom. “I’m sorry but he’s not here!” She gasped.

“We’ll be right there!” Bilbo told her swiftly. “If you see him don’t let him leave the house!”

“Yes sir!” She replied and hung up to go search the house again.

Bilbo motioned Thorin to join him for a minute in the corridor.

“What’s going on?” Thorin gazed at his assistant worried.

“Fili’s feeling really bad, I’m taking him home. But I have no idea where Kili is. I called Tauriel but she has no idea where he is. Mrs. Bringsbee said he was at home so we’re going there now.” Bilbo quickly told him.

“What do you mean you have no idea where he is?” Thorin gasped.

“That’s the problem!” Bilbo hissed.

“Go check at home, I’ll get Ori to search the building here!” Thorin immediately made the call. “Call Tauriel again, if anyone knows where he might be it’s her.” He noticed in a grim tone.

“I have no idea what to do!” Bilbo gasped clearly lost.

“Don’t panic, we’ll find him!” Thorin told him. “I’ll finish this as fast as possible.”

“Is there a problem?” Balin asked in a worried tone.

“Fili’s is not feeling well so Bilbo is taking him home.” Thorin told them politely.

“I see, so can we continue?” Balin asked calmly.

“What about the second boy Kili?” Dwalin noticed.

“That’s the real problem, but we’ll find him soon enough.” Thorin tried not to seem too worried.

“What do you mean?” Balin asked worried.

“He tends to have panic attacks.” Thorin told them slowly.

“So this is nothing new?” Balin really worried.

“Not really.” Thorin calmly confirmed.

“If there is anything we can do to help!” Balin immediately proposed.

“If there will be I’ll contact you.” Thorin replied calmly.

\-----

“Mrs. Bringsbee where is Kili?” Bilbo asked worried.

“I honestly have no idea!” She told him. “He was here around one, but now he’s just gone.”

“Oh my...” Bilbo rushed to his room.

He walked in and he immediately noticed Kili’s laptop wasn’t on his desk. He reached into the wardrobe and it looked as if someone had turned it upside down.

“Oh my!” Bilbo clenched his head.

He rushed to Fili’s room and found him crying on the bed.

“Fili are you okay?” Bilbo asked worried.

But Fili just continued crying and passed Bilbo a piece of paper.

“I hope you’ll be happy. Goodbye and take care. Don’t look for me...” Bilbo gazed at Fili.

“Do you mean he ran away?” Bilbo’s voice was near breakdown.

“Oh my Mahal I need to call Thorin!” Bilbo quickly pulled out his phone.

\-----

“Where is he?” Tauriel rushed into their house.

“We have no idea where Kili is!” Bilbo gasped with defeat.

“I meant Fili!” She gasped.

“In his room!” Bilbo told her coldly.

She ran up the stairs.

“What the hell happened?” She corned Fili.

“What do you mean?” Fili was still sobbing.

“He was all bright and happy in the morning, what did you tell him?” She insisted.

“I can’t tell you!” Fili continued crying.

“Cut the crap, if you want to find him you need my help!” She insisted.

“Did you two fight about something?” She insisted.

But Fili did not respond he just continued crying.

“Fucking hell!” She gasped and slammed the door.

“So you have no idea where he is?” Bilbo asked Tauriel as she came back to the living room.

“No idea...” She folded her legs worried.

“Tauriel where is Kili?” Thorin stormed in.

“I have no idea...” She began sobbing desperately. “I’m really worried!”

“Fili?” Thorin asked Bilbo.

“He’s pretty shaken, he’s crying in his room.” Bilbo told him.

“Do you have any idea where he might have gone?” Thorin insisted.

“He just left this...” Bilbo passed the note to Thorin.


End file.
